All posts by Jan

A Day in a Life: I Asked For It

It seems that this blog, which I began in an effort to highlight how Jeanne’s messages relate and intersect with everyday life, is more or less turning into a blog about setting and awaiting outcome of unbending intent, as the seers call it, at least for now. Over the past twelve weeks I’ve been exploring dreaming intent, in which I had sent out a proposal to the women seers of don Juan’s generation of the sorcerers of ancient Mexico, to come and teach me in dreaming. I was utterly amazed as the nights unfolded and I did, in fact, learn invaluable lessons from those women. That process took place last fall and since then I have continued setting dreaming intent each night that I feel I want to go exploring, and although I do not specifically intend to dream with those women, I know they have continued to lead me on some pretty cool adventures. Some nights I may just want to sleep soundly and dreamlessly and that, too, becomes my intent. On the night of June 2, 2010, right before midnight, I had a most profound out-of-body experience (OBE). It was more vivid than any other OBE I have ever had. Clearly, the shamanic work I am doing and the books I have been reading are major factors in how the experience unfolded and how I reacted to what was happening.

In keeping with Jeanne’s message on Monday of this week, to not hold back, I write today about that experience, sharing it with you not only because it was so profound, but also because it is perhaps the thirteenth step in learning a shamanic practice. Before I describe the experience, I quote a paragraph from The Second Ring of Power, the book I was reading just before going to bed that night. Carlos Castaneda is talking to la Gorda and the women of his own generation of seers about the various stages of learning dreaming from the nagual, don Juan. On pages 269-270 Carlos says:

The final stage was drawing the “attention of the nagual” to focus on the total self. Don Juan said that that final stage was usually ushered in by a dream that many of us have had at one time or another, in which one is looking at oneself sleeping in bed. By the time the sorcerer has had such a dream, his attention has been developed to such a degree that instead of waking himself up, as most of us would do in a similar situation, he turns on his heels and engages himself in activity, as if he were acting in the world of everyday life. From that moment on there is a breakage, a division of sorts in the otherwise unified personality. The result of engaging the “attention of the nagual” and developing it to the height and sophistication of our daily attention of the world was, in don Juan’s scheme, the other self, an identical being as oneself, but made in “dreaming.”

Don Juan went on to encourage Carlos to practice, saying that there are no definite steps for teaching that double, or dreaming self, just as there are no definite steps to teaching ourselves how to be aware in our daily lives; we do it by practicing it from the time we are born. Don Juan also encouraged Carlos to practice without fear getting the best of him. After reading the above quote, I recalled how other out-of-body explorers generally suggest that looking at the self asleep is to be avoided because when attention is drawn back to the physical body it may arouse fear, causing us to snap out of the experience and land right back into that sleeping self. In contrast, I saw that don Juan was actually suggesting that looking at the sleeping self was part of the process in learning to fully “dream.” When I fell asleep that night I merely put out my intent to “see” and to “dream.” Here is my experience, which I will attempt to capture in as much detail as possible:

I wake up and look outside through the sliding glass door of the bedroom. I see what I perceive as an airplane blinking behind the trees in the distance; it blinks quickly and then swings sharply to the left, low on the horizon. As I watch this unusually strange maneuver, I think that perhaps it’s not an airplane after all, but a shooting star. But even that idea does not fit what I’m seeing, because the light doesn’t shoot and burn out, but flies directly towards the deck, which is right outside the sliding door. The light flits about and I wonder if it’s a firefly, but I’ve never seen one this big nor one that zips about so happily, bouncing in the air, its fat body large and bright, a luminous elongated egg-shape, and not blinking on and off like the light of a firefly.

During all of this I am partially sitting up in bed, feeling extremely uncomfortable and awkward, blinking my eyes over and over again in order to clear them so I can see better. I feel very heavy, drugged by sleep, and it’s a struggle to stay sitting up, but something is drawing me to the window. With great effort I get out of bed, still feeling clumsy, as if very intoxicated; my legs don’t work right and yet, somehow, I step over the sleeping dog lying on the floor next to me and make it over to the sliding glass door. From this vantage point, I see that not only one bright light is fluttering and swooping outside in the darkness above the backyard, but more are starting to come from the same spot in the sky. Suddenly, but without fear, I realize that this may relate to what I’d been reading before I fell asleep, that I am “seeing” as the seers see. With that thought I wonder if I’m out-of-body. I recall what I’d just read, that when one can tolerate seeing one’s body lying asleep then one is truly “seeing and “dreaming.” I decide that I’ll turn and see if my body is lying in bed, as don Juan suggested, reminding myself not to be frightened if I see my body lying there, because I don’t want to snap back into it.

I am still feeling very clumsy and think that normally I’d turn slightly and glance over my right shoulder, but that doesn’t feel right in the state I’m in. As soon as I think that thought, I feel myself swing effortlessly around, counterclockwise, in a sweeping 360 degree turn, though I don’t actually move; only my “seeing” moves, as if my eyes can see in all directions. Halfway around, I quickly take in the darkness of the room, that the covers are pulled up, and I see my legs and Chuck’s sleeping form under the blankets, but the top of the bed is in such darkness that I cannot see our heads. When I finish the turn, when I finish seeing the room, I am facing right back out toward the deck and the yard again. I sense my “body” flattened against the sliding door, as if I’m but a thin sheet of cellophane stuck to it.

At that moment, I realize that I’m in my “double,” that I am indeed “dreaming,” and as soon as that thought crosses my awareness the first light-being flies right up to the deck and dances before me. A large egg-shaped luminous creature, about ten or twelve inches in length, it comes right up to the window. Flitting about, it twirls and loops in front of me and, as it begins to fly off to the right, I am struck by how similar it appears to the way I have always perceived Jeanne’s energy, a luminous being with white wings and body, butterfly-like more than firefly-like. As soon as I have that thought, the being flies back in front of me and seems to show me that, yes, it is exactly Jeanne’s energy. It pirouettes before me, flutters its wings and seems to laugh with delight, happy that I’m now perceiving it correctly. I feel its energy, so alive and so vibrant.

As I watch this show taking place, I blink repeatedly, constantly trying to clear my vision so that I don’t miss anything. My mind, however, is still trying to place what I’m seeing, to make sense of what these creatures might be. I have one final thought that perhaps they are luna moths, and just as I settle on that idea, I let it go and pay greater attention to what is happening outside the window. I see the light-beings still coming towards me, pouring out of the same point on the horizon behind the trees, their fat bellies luminously glowing, getting brighter and brighter and bigger and bigger, as they bounce through the air, swooping and dancing towards me.

I stand and watch this beautiful show for a long time, pressed up against the window, blinking and taking in, with a sense of wonder, delight, and amazement, the absolutely serene silent beauty of these creatures, these luminous beings, as they dance and float before me. I’m able to turn and “see” the show to the right and to the left, as well as straight ahead, without actually turning. I’m simply able to “see” in all directions.

As the show continues, I’m fully aware that I’m being given a gift of not only “seeing” and “dreaming,” but also of interpreting energy, that these creatures are showing me what energy looks like, and somehow I understand this. I know that I look like that too, that we are all luminous egg-shaped beings. I know that we are all full of such vigor, potent with energy, that we are energy, that we are incredibly luminescent. I know that we are all magical beings.

I don’t know how long I actually stand there pressed against the window, but somehow I get back into my body, though I don’t remember actually traveling back over to the bed. The next thing I do know is that I wake up, still feeling that drowsy soporific heaviness and I write down in my journal a cryptic description of what I’ve just experienced, not wanting to forget it, but already knowing that I’ll never forget it.

The next morning, the experience remained as fresh and real as it had been the night before. I puzzled over what had actually happened, my mind conjuring up the idea of luna moths again, wanting to settle on some rational explanation for what I’d experienced, but I knew those were not creatures of this world. I still held the truer feeling of having experienced pure energy, coming in a form I could handle, and that truth and that energy has lasted to this day.

This was a turning point. I’ve never doubted what I “saw” and what I felt. My awareness was totally intact, my thoughts were mine; I was always me throughout the entire episode. I truly believe that I received something energetically from those luminous beings during this experience, that I was invited into experiencing my own boundless energy body. I can truthfully say that since that night my personal energy, my physical energy has remained steadily vibrant and glowing. My fears have vanished and I am no longer holding back. This is the world I have worked so hard to enter and I know that I can’t turn back. I can no longer experience or interpret reality in the old way. I humbly report that I learned to “see.”

Try some dreaming. Might I recommend reading a little Castaneda beforehand, or a little Buhlman, then set unbending intent, go to sleep, and see what happens?

Until next week, I send love and energy,
Jan

NOTE: Books and authors mentioned in this essay can be found in our Store.

#694 Don’t Hold Back

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Today’s weekly message falls on what was once a special day for you, your birthday. I extend birthday wishes, though I know you are far from this world in that sense.

Several people have forwarded us channeled messages regarding what is happening in the Gulf of Mexico, to our earth, to the animals, to ourselves, to life itself. All of them contain the same messages that you have been sending out for all the years that I have channeled you, the messages that we humans have come far from our true energetic roots and lost our connection to nature, earth, and spirit. At the same time that such messages are traveling around the globe, and the messages for all of us to awaken are stressed, I detect a new sensitivity and desire for truth, realness, and for connection to what really matters. I, personally, have always felt that most people, behind their fears and facades, are spiritually hungry and driven, but it has not been conventionally acceptable to be so. As the world became more technologically advanced and plastic we have further neglected our inner worlds.

I also feel that there is a big shift taking place, and whether it is intentionally set by our deeper yearning for connection to nature and spirit or not, it is happening anyway. This is the message that is being spread: change is being forced upon you, so are you going to take up the challenge and change as well?

We have conversed on this topic many times. Chuck has also written extensively about it in his blog. Is there anything new you would like to say on the subject? Or is there some other special message you would like to express on this once special day? Happy Birthday, Jeanne!

The messages of change and alarm must continue to spread, for although you may intuit a slow demise of earth’s resources over the past century, so must you now all take note: this disaster is of far greater consequence than you can imagine. Your time upon that earth must now become an era of full consciousness, your masses awoken with bitter truths, as the blood of Mother Earth does spill upon the shores. But of far more consequence is the impact upon the balance of nature that has thus far been heavily compromised and contaminated, left far too long. Balance no longer knows its own definition for it has long tilted into decay. The resulting heaviness of such poor attention to the balance of nature shows how powerfully mankind effects his environment.

This is an environmental disaster that has long been pending so do not make it into what it is not. Nor is this a spiritual disaster alone, but a far-reaching reality of your world. Your world is utterly compromised in that region, in the Gulf of Mexico, where there is, as of yet, no true knowledge to either describe it or to halt it. The fact is that greed is destroying the very earth. Earth, in its far superior mode of reaction to cause and effect, will not cease to spill its contents upon the waters and the land.

The biggest truth is that shift has already happened. Do you not see that it is no longer pending? Do you not see that the time of waiting for something to happen has passed? The thing that once seemed so far off and remote has already taken place. You are all living in a new world now. That is what you must wake up to. The world is different now.

Did you miss the moment of shift? On this day that I once celebrated as my own moment of shift, I suggest that you, each one of you, look at where shift has occurred in your own life; for something has changed now, and you are forced into acting and reacting differently in all aspects of life as a result. Notice that you have been pushed to change for a long time now. Accept that this is true for you, but also accept that this is true for all human beings.

Begin now to speak of this shift, of this push to change and awaken to the inner self. Your comments will be fully reciprocated, for there is a new language of intent spreading like wildfire upon that earth. It is the fire of new energy boiling up out of the Gulf of Mexico, burning back the times of greed and exploitation to reveal the utter truth of what life upon that earth is really all about: growth, transformation, evolution, respect for all living beings, love and compassion, and, above all, a time of shift to a level of higher awareness and to knowledge of that which lies beyond.

Take into consideration the gifts you are now being offered to truly shift your own awareness, to see what you could not clearly see before, to seriously consider that your time there is more meaningful than you have allowed yourself to believe, and that now you are being forcefully urged to embrace it to the fullest.

Do not hold back. I urge all of you to fully express your spiritual energetic selves. The earth itself is showing you how, without attachment to the resisters or the pretenders or the fearful ones. Go for it. Be one with the energy of your new times. Energy is abundant, but it must now come from within. The answers lie within.

A Day in a Life: The Twelfth Step—Feminine Energy

On November 4, 2009, I wrote in my journal during the night: I wake up in a dream in heightened sexual arousal, having an orgasm. Oh, yes, I am dreaming and having an orgasm in my dream, so I go with it knowing that it is my own sexual energy that is aroused and activated in orgasm.

Each night for several weeks last fall, I asked to be connected with the women seers of don Juan’s line of sorcerers and each night I was taken on an adventure or given some experience, perspective, or knowledge. It began as a process in learning how to set unbending intent, to detach from the outcome, and to be totally open to what arrived. It grew into something much more than that as the nights unfolded. In this final night of dreaming with the women seers I was able to tap into my feminine energy. On the night before, I was in a heightened state of utter calm, encased in all-knowing awareness. As I wrote about last week in this blog, I believe this step of utter calm was only achievable because I had worked through the previous ten steps and understood the meaning of doing deep inner work, such as recapitulation. With that being said, I believe this final step was also achievable only because I had been able to access that place of utter calm knowing through the process of accepting and acquiescing to the journey I had taken in the past and by remaining open to the possibilities of the journey still to come.

Preceding this dream of orgasm and feminine energy, I had been practicing what I call the feminine energy breath as taught to Taisha by Clara.* This breathing entails inhaling in through the vagina up the back of the body to a point between the shoulder blades, holding it there, then continuing to inhale up the neck and over the top of the head to the third eye, and holding it there before releasing the breath down the face, over the front of the body and drawing it back into the vagina. I had been doing this breathing pattern three or four times during my morning yoga and shamanic practice, and during the day whenever I thought about it, for several weeks. The day before this dreaming episode I had done it pretty much throughout the entire day.

It felt so appropriate that I should have this dream of tapping into sexual energy at this point. I had, as I mentioned, gone into this dreaming process with the women seers with the intent to learn something from them and I felt that I had really worked through and processed everything they taught me. I trusted, quite innocently, that by setting my intent each night my call for guidance would be answered. Apparently, I was ready for this final step: to tap into and feel not only sexual feminine energy, but what I can only describe as being an all-encompassing energy, what the yogis call kundalini, as it rode up and spread like fire throughout my entire body. I knew however that it totally belonged to and came from within me, that it had nothing to do with another person, that it was my own energy on fire, so to speak; that it was real, accessible, and totally enjoyably present inside me. I just had to access it to discover the reality of it.

When I woke up out of the dream I knew that it was not something that only women could experience, but that every one of us, men and women, have this energy inside of us waiting to be accessed and experienced in this whole body release. And yes, it is feminine. That to me is the most interesting part of this final step. I fully understood that it was feminine in nature, but not limited to women. I was aware of the underlying psychodynamic of the masculine and feminine energy balance inside each of us and that we must learn to access both aspects of this energy, that they are present for very different reasons, and if we do not allow ourselves to tap into each one of them we will not be whole, either as human beings or as energy beings.

Throughout this twelve-step dreaming process I was aware of the presence of Jeanne’s energy alongside that of the women seers. I felt her presence, hovering in the background. Perhaps she was there as a mentor or protector, I am not sure, but her energy was present and distinctly different from that of the other energy I met with. All of that energy also felt distinctly feminine. How I knew this I am at a loss to explain, I just knew it was the energy of women.

As I finish writing about this process of dreaming with the women seers I am most struck by the unfolding of it. From the moment of first setting the intent, to being completely open and allowing myself to stay present in each dreaming event, I learned that everything is possible. I learned what it means to fully trust the experiential. It was a magical process in many ways, sometimes fleeting and difficult to grasp, other times very clear and concise, but definitely, experientially, as real as it gets.

Until next week, keep breathing and dreaming. And don’t forget that setting intent really does work. If you wish, feel free to write about your own dreaming experiences in the comment section below.

Love,
Jan

* NOTE: The breathing I mention is described on pages 45-46 in The Sorcerer’s Crossing by Taisha Abelar, available in our STORE under Shamanism.

#692 Choice Matters

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Personally, I have noticed an increase in experiences of energy. About a week ago I had a profound out of body experience (OBE). I have also noticed that energetically speaking, in the outer world, there has been a lot of activity. There have been days when everyone seems to be angry. Other days everyone we meet seems caught in an old place, and other days everyone seems flowing and full of awareness. It feels as if this particular time in our lives, and in the history of the world, is offering us such power to change, to do things differently, and yet we hesitate. I am speaking of personal issues that arise to remind me to keep changing, but also of the issues of our own country and the signs of change that all of us are constantly facing. The main realization that I experience, energetically speaking and otherwise, is that we are not in charge, that a far greater force is asking us to acquiesce and flow with the true awareness that we are all energy beings. I believe this force is inside each one of us. When we slow down and experience it, as I did in my OBE, we feel enlightened, but then we go back to our daily lives, seeking to join that world of energy with the state of our crumbling world and we come up against so many impenetrable walls, walls of self-doubt, of judgment, of the need to be human, as well as the visceral memory of the experience and wonder of it all, of the magic.

I understand that acquiescence to energetic reality takes time. But I also wonder, are people really understanding that our energy experiences, such as an OBE, are the true reality that we seek and must turn to now? I don’t think I am making an uninformed assumption. I fully feel that not enough people are getting what it means to be energy beings, that which you speak of so often, what don Juan, Carlos and the women seers teach about, what quantum physics is about, and what the religions of the world sprang from: the fact that we are all energy beings caught in a fixed reality and that it is up to us to dismantle that fixation, whether by fault or on purpose, in order to “see” better. I believe we are now in the midst of that process of dismantling and it does not matter to God, or Mother Earth, or the energy of intent how we go about that. Our awareness must now shift so that we do not lose this opportunity to evolve, to flow with the earth itself, as change is more fully brought upon us. It is now imperative that we all make some drastic changes in our personal lives.

Can you comment on my feelings that, each day, we are being confronted with powerful energy alerts? Some days, we are asked to fight through them, to express our anger and discontent. Other days we are asked to gently flow, but, at all times, we are being asked to be aware of the energy around us and how it affects and guides us to evolve. We are, I believe, being shown, each day, what we must change about ourselves, whether those things are inner aspects such as judgments, prejudices, fears or denials, or whether they are how we choose to live in the world. I feel that it is time for all of us to face what we have created, both inside us and outside us. Can you offer your comments and guidance as to what we have become and where we should go now?

My Dear One, the world you inhabit, the world of everyday life, is but one reality, yet it is the playing field for your evolving self. I do not like to speculate because, as you know, choice matters and that is really the crux of everything that you speak of today.

Each one of you must choose how you will live. Is this lifetime dedicated to building a nice ego, to engaging in self-important behaviors of inflation, bullying, self-aggrandizing—all necessary aspects of learning what it means to be human? Is this lifetime dedicated to victimhood, to eternal big-babyhood, to sucking off the lives and energies of others? Is this lifetime a predatory life or a simple life of deflation and self-loss, or are those aspects simply building blocks to an evolving self in this lifetime? Have you presented your self with challenges that require you to take abrupt and mighty steps out of an old world and into a new one?

You see, you must first address your personal challenge. What is your personal challenge? Where are you caught? Then the next challenge is to discover the means of taking that giant step to a new level of self and awareness. You see, your assumption, My Dear Jan, that you and the world are one, on a similar journey, is correct. You would not be living at this time if the world did not reflect the challenges that you each, as individuals, face. Your world outside of you is your inner world vividly reflected, staunchly produced and accessible. It can be so easy to see how to solve the issues of that world and how everything is being done wrong, going too slowly or quickly, in the opposite direction from what you know is right, and, yet, can you turn your frustrations with that world innerly and accept the energetic consequences of the decisions you personally make each day?

Energy is energy. You are, each one of you, energy. What flows outside of you has the ability to flow inside of you and affect you greatly. You are in control of your own energy and everything about you is set up for you to learn this fact. You may not feel or admit that you are, though you so easily may see that the world outside of you is all set for change, and perhaps for total collapse. Energetically speaking, whatever happens to your outer world is good for it. Energetically speaking, the flow of life is being directed by the choices that have been made in that world. Your own life is flowing according to the choices you make.

I do not judge or hold attachment to that world or the choices of individuals, except to point out your teaching tools and your learning process. Abide by the laws of energy and you will learn about awareness, awareness as clear-seeing. Perhaps this may come to you in intuitive knowing so that your choices may be clearly shown to you. Perhaps your awareness may come in the form of puzzling experiences that you must need in order to better understand what you need in life. Perhaps you will only have full understanding by incremental learning, rather than bursts of knowledge too big to hold onto and fathom. Most humans need to learn in this incremental manner, for true energetic reality is too much to take in.

In answer to your queries about the energy around you in your world and the intensities you now feel, I suggest that you attempt a new measure of attention to what is happening around you, because it is indeed a significant time to be alive. But in your personal world, what are you supposed to be learning? What is your personal growth challenge at this moment? How can you change with the changing world?

Change is inevitable. Are you going to flow with it, or are you going to perish in the vast sea of darkness? Really, the choice is simple. You must ask yourself: What do I fear most, the energetic unknown or the old familiar darkness? In order to change, one must enter the darkness, but you must elect to take the journey. Oh, and by the way, no matter how you answer that question, the journey will be the same. You must face your fears and learn that they too are but energetic realities to be confronted and passed through on the way to the next level of awareness.

You must confront everything you need to confront, whether you elect to go willingly or kicking and screaming. Don’t you know that you are all going anyway? What else is there? You are all beings who are going to die. How do you elect to experience death? That is the next question to ponder. And don’t wait too long to decide. Get right on it; there is no time to waste!

A Day in a Life: Dreaming the Eleventh Step—Inner Calm Knowing

Rely on the self
the inner knowing
.

The above was written in the middle of the night of November 3, 2009 when I was dreaming with the women seers of don Juan’s generation. This is what I wrote in my journal upon awakening the next morning: I was in a place of incredibly balanced calm where I totally understood, intuitively, what inner knowing meant. I was tapping into it and thoroughly enjoying the peacefulness of it. It was a struggle to write down what I was feeling, and what I should have written was lost because I took a long time to alert myself to the fact that I should write it down. Instead, I wrote the above, knowing full well that it did not capture the experience I was having nor the greater meaning of it. The feelings I was experiencing encompassed compassion, detachment, balance, utter calm and complete knowing — a total knowing with access to all knowledge, including the state I was in at the moment. I was able to stay in that state of utterness, of knowing with access to greater knowledge, simply because I could access inner calm. It is a place I want to stay in. It appears to be quite accessible, and I can get there by intent. Once there, all mysteries dissolve; everything is clearly known. (End of journal entry.)

I had channeled ten elements of a shamanic practice and when I wondered if there would be an eleventh I went into this calm inner world, which I believe was showing me what is achievable if the ten steps of shamanic awareness are practiced. I do not think I could have so easily reached this place of utter calm knowing if I had not learned and thoroughly processed the preceding ten steps. Furthermore, had I not done a pretty thorough recapitulation, I would not have been able to truly take in and assimilate those steps either because, as it turns out, they are all very pragmatic steps of the recapitulation process.

When I began my recapitulation nine years ago, I did not have any steps to follow, per se, but followed my own process as it unfolded, day by day, seeing where my body took me, what triggers arose, what synchronicities, dreams and experiences appeared to guide me, and what came to pull me back into my past. That was the process of recapitulation as I undertook it, guided by Chuck in this world and Jeanne in her world. It lasted for three full years and, in fact, to be truthful, it did not begin with the word recapitulation even being spoken, until I was deeply into the process.

The process unfolded as I learned to flow with it, and, as Chuck began to introduce me to the shamanic world, it became very clear that we were fully immersed in a recapitulation process. I say “we” because, although I alone took the journey, I was fully supported by Chuck and Jeanne, by their knowledge of the shamanic and spiritual experiences I was having. As I allowed myself to go deeper and deeper into experiences from childhood that had been completely blocked the recapitulation took on a life of its own, showing me how to gain access to all parts of myself, spiritual, physical, mental and emotional, through memories, dreams, flashbacks, visions, and experiences in this reality, in the past, and in other worlds.

A thorough recapitulation leads to wholeness, to integration of all aspects of self, and that leads to the place of utter calmness that I experienced in dreaming with the women seers that night. I longed to stay there, but eventually I woke up and had to leave it, but only for the moment. I knew I had that place of calmness inside me. I am never far from it; I just have to go there.

Next week, I will write about the twelfth and final step in developing a shamanic practice that I learning in my dreaming with the women seers.

Until then, keep dreaming, keep setting intent, and keep recapitulating!
Love,
Jan

NOTE: The day after I had this experience I posed a question to Jeanne in the channeling blog regarding it, which I link to here. She, in turn, offered the first of three steps in learning detachment, in an evolutionary sense.