Each day is a new beginning, a new opportunity to grab ahold of life, to wake up and begin anew, an opportunity to re-do, re-make, re-create yourself in a new way. Whether something small and inner or something more visible, each day’s dawning offers an opportunity for change. Without blame or shame, realize that you are the creator responsible for the outcome of your own life. Without judgment, make choices today that lead you one more step in the new direction you have chosen. With loving kindness embrace your creative power and bring yourself one step closer to your ideal you. Today is another new day and another opportunity to be kind and loving to the self in a new and proactive way. Get creative, and make this day’s journey unique, for you. With joyful intent and a positive attitude, of course!
I don’t really know that much about astrology. I follow a few blogs, but I get lost in the planets, in the alignments and polarities. I find the details mind-boggling. It’s often like reading a foreign language. But even so, I know what I feel.
I woke up in the middle of the night. I was awake during the moment of the cardinal grand cross, a rare four planet pattern that occurred last night. As I lay awake, I knew it was time to make further inroads into the changes that I’ve been instituting over the past several years. “Now,” I thought to myself, “is the time to fully make the shift.”
Life challenges us all the time. Life asks us to make decisions, to face our difficulties, and to keep growing. I just have to look out the window and I know that facing my challenges is in alignment with nature, planetary or otherwise. Nature dies and then pushes through. The grass grows, the flowers bloom, the leaves appear once again.
I notice the signs that come to greet me, underscoring this time of shift. A butterfly flies over our heads as we sit in the yard, a little early we think. Two moths appear at the window, right in front of my eyes. I cannot fail to take in the significance; spirit is calling.
Spirit is always calling. As Chuck and I were discussing this morning, we are all born equipped with it. Then we lose it. We lose touch with our innocence, our connection to the wonder and the magic, but then we spend our lives looking for it. Sometimes we are doing this with purpose and at other times we do it unconsciously. But spirit calls out to us in so many ways, asking us to come back to our equipment again, that which we were born with, our connection to the energy of everything. In answering the call, we are declaring that we are ready, knowing full well that changing ourselves will take work. We put on our warrior self and we fight alongside our spirit self as we break through old worlds and old behaviors, old patterns that have kept us in bondage, so that we can achieve our own perfect grand cross.
When I began my recapitulation, it was really because my spirit was calling so loudly that I could not ignore it. Following that call meant the collapse of everything, but it also meant the beginning of new life. In shift, in change, there is death and rebirth, breaking apart and building up. Endings and beginnings are bundled up, tangled up in the process of change. Gradually the destruction turns to construction, as new structures based on spirit begin to take over and the new world that we’ve been working on for so long finally begins taking shape.
The feeling is that now is the time to implement that which has been taking shape, to not only notice the signs of spirit but act on them. We all have something inside of us, some goal, some desire, some creative urge, our spirit calling out to us in some way. My spirit once called out to me because it was dying, but now it is alive and well, living a full and productive life, but still it calls out to me: Time to go deeper still! And so I pay heed. “Yes,” I say, “time to go deeper still!”
It’s time for all of us to let spirit take us more fully into experiencing just what “deeper still” means. I’m game!
I sit, sun pouring through the window. I absorb its heat and the glow of the light. I know we’re at the precipice of a major shift, but in this moment I bask in the awe of the sun’s rays. This week has been about changing dreams, minor shifts of focus that take us into other worlds, worlds of rejuvenation and awe, worlds that take us deeper into the magic.
I open The Eagle’s Gift by Carlos Castaneda, to a moment in time when Carlos and la Gorda were caught in powerlessness and gloom. “One day, in order to alleviate our distress momentarily, I suggested that we immerse ourselves in dreaming,” Carlos wrote. “As soon as I voiced my suggestion, I became aware that a gloom which had been haunting me for days could be drastically altered by willing the change. I clearly understood then that the problem with la Gorda and myself had been that we had unwittingly focused on fear and distrust, as if those were the only possible options available to us, while all along we had had, without consciously knowing it, the alternative of deliberately centering our attention on the opposite, the mystery, the wonder of what had happened to us.” (p. 127)
In this moment, I am thankful for the coming uncertainty, the forced interruptions in the continuity of routine. These are the wake-up calls to change the dream. These are those moments in a dream when we are invited to lucidity, when the absurdity of circumstance stirs our awareness to wake up and realize this can’t be real, we must be in a dream. If we awaken to that truth, without waking from the dream, we are freed to enter new dreams of possibility in full awareness.
In waking life, as well, we can find or create glitches to awaken ourselves from the trance we are induced into from the habits we mostly inhabit through the routine days of our lives, through the repetition of our behaviors, and the slumps we find ourselves so often stuck in. These trances of habit so define our actions as to shape our needs and daily outlook into fear, distrust, and boredom.
Yet, at any moment we can intentionally pause and reclaim our awareness! In the moment we skip outside the mundane—the routine, the expectations, the pain, the frustration, the sadness, the shame, the fears, the disappointments—and choose instead to occupy “the wonder of what has happened to us,” we offer ourselves the opportunity to enter a new reality, a new dream entered in full waking consciousness.
We are beings on magical journeys, fully capable of shifting our lives in an instant, making ourselves available to love and enjoy every moment of our magical lives, simply by, as Carlos says, willing a new dream.
Living a healthy life, for as long as we are here, is all about care of the self, striving to know the self at the deepest level, learning to love and to receive, giving the inner self and the outer self equal attention and importance. It’s about valuing who we are and what we have to offer, because we all have something to offer. It’s about fully embracing the real self—the true self that we all know we are but are often afraid to express—allowing it live to the fullest.
This is not an easy task! We must struggle to maintain balance, both internally and externally, while we simultaneously must wrestle with our human desires and appetites. If we are to succeed, we must pay attention to our bodies, our minds, and our spirits, as well as all the parts of ourselves that constantly vie for our attention. We must learn to be okay with where we are. We must remain fully aware that life itself wishes us to grow and change. We must be okay with what comes to us from outside, knowing that it is there to guide and teach us. I see both negative and positive aspects of life as obstacles because whether they are harsh or difficult challenges and confrontations, diseases and physical impediments, or even if everything comes easily to us, they all challenge us to individuate and mature so that we may reach our fullest potential.
If we can begin to accept that life is more than just a mundane, sad, unfulfilled existence; if we can embrace it as an exciting experience in a most fantastic realm, we open ourselves to something far beyond the norm. In simply deciding that the life we are in is enough, in acknowledging that what we must contend with everyday is our necessary pathway to change, we begin to experience life in a new way.
I create my own reality, and so, if I constantly complain about my life then I will never experience life in a new way. I will only experience what I say and tell myself. But if I shake off the negative speak that runs through me and contaminates my experience, I offer myself the possibility for a new experience. This is what Jeanne speaks of in her messages. Each week she asks us to be open and willing to face life in a new way, not viewing it as a horrible or frightening experience, nor as a tiresome task or depressing situation, but as an exciting adventure. She asks us to be energetically available to life in a new way.
Living a healthy life, and gaining awareness of who we are and where we are really being led in our personal lives, entails constantly seeking balance, paying attention to what our bodies tell us, honing our skills of self-communication and dialogue with the inner self—all parts of that inner self. A good way to begin intending and asserting a new attitude toward life, is to pay attention to our physical bodies. In simply paying attention to our body’s messages, we might just have the first big breakthrough to new life.
Recently, I have been struggling with a lower back ache. It’s due to heavy lifting of 40 pound bags of pellets and the hauling of firewood. I have had to pay attention to it, as it will not let me do otherwise. It’s forcing me to stay in my body. I already know that this is one of my greatest challenges in this lifetime, to be present in my physical body. Through my entire recapitulation, being present in my body meant facing the pain and humiliation of the sexual abuse I suffered as a child. As a child I got really good at leaving my body—it was a means of escape from the pain it carried—so good that for most of my life I was never really in it. My recapitulation taught me that my body was a good place, my vehicle through life, absolutely necessary if I was to evolve. And so I struggle constantly to remain present, to not drift off as I am naturally wont to do.
To change a habit that once saved my life has been challenging. And so, I am thankful for the aches and pains of my lower spine, reminding me every day to pay attention to what my body is telling me. I am addressing it constantly in a multitude of healing practices, but my biggest healing has been to let it be present, to work with it, to let it guide me to what I should and should not be doing at this time in my life.
I have always been physically strong, able to do exactly what I wanted, and so I never limited myself in anyway. Now, I must face that I am limited and sometimes, I must admit, it has been a real pain—pun intended! I can’t just do anymore; now I have to think before I do, and that is both a challenge and a contemplative process. I must stay in my body basically all the time, in every moment of the day. If I do not, it reminds me —OUCH!— to come back! And so, I am constantly present, paying attention to what I am doing in each moment. Life has become a constant walking/sitting meditation. I am paying attention to the fact that my back, always so strong and readily available, is now saying: Don’t take on so much for others; don’t give away your energy so easily, protect it, use it for what is most important. You are not allowed to bear so much anymore. You are important—take care of you!
Each morning, Chuck and I begin the day by each pulling a card from our favorite Tarot deck. It’s a way of anchoring ourselves in our intent—the intent to remain balanced, aware, and open to life. Each day we ask the cards to supply us with what we need most to guide us. The answer, whatever it is, always reminds us to pay attention to our internal worlds as well as our external worlds, as they mirror each other perfectly. Each day we both pick the perfect response to where we are individually, and as a loving, growing partnership as well. How could it be otherwise? The universe is always in alignment with us! The challenge is for us to get in alignment with it!
My little back ache is asking me to pull back from too much experience in the outer world, to hone my skills in my inner world in a new way. And so I have been daring myself—as you know, if you’ve been listening to my weekly channeled messages—to deepen my experience as an energetic being. Yes, I must live life fully in my body, accept my strong physical self, but equally my strong spiritual self as well. And that is why I have a backache!
I see this as part of my process of growth and change, in alignment with my spirit’s intent to constantly grow. I don’t believe we are here to just grow once and then plunk down and say, “Okay, I did it, I changed.” No, the challenge is to keep growing. Likewise, if all I do is moan about my aching back, nothing will shift for me at all, all I’ll have is a painful back and a depressing life. But, if I elect to use this challenge, then I am doing something to shift myself, to change my perception of life, and hone my awareness. In fact, I create a new reality for myself.
I hope you all find out what your little or big aches, pains and challenges are trying to alert you to. Mostly, they ask us to confront something, to get to the bottom of who we are, to make amends, and move on to the next challenge. We just have to be ready to face and accept the truth of that challenge, and act upon it in a positive, healing way. Acting upon it is often the greatest challenge. Many times I have had to feel the searing pain in my lower back to remind me of just how I am being asked to act upon the messages I receive.
Good luck! And be careful out there if you are shoveling all that snow today!
Here is today’s channeling. I began with a little introduction and unfortunately hit the stop button rather than the pause button, so I am posting two audio files. The first one is my intro and the second one is the channeled message for today.
On a synchronistic note, I opened my eyes as I finished the channeling to see a large shape seemingly sitting in the bird feeder. “What the heck?” I thought, thinking at first that it was a large hawk, but as I got up and went to the window saw that it was the head of a deer! I knew that deer were coming in the night and eating the leftover seeds from the day, since the feeder pan was always empty each morning. Now I had the culprit! I knocked on the window, but the deer only moved back a little onto the lawn. She stayed around for a good fifteen minutes while I got the camera and took pictures of her.
She came back to the feeder too! Taking small steps, as we are encouraged to do in today’s channeling, she trusted that she was safe. She knew very well that I was at the window, as she’d glance up every now and then, as if to say, “I see you, but I am not afraid. You are open and I too am open.” I sent her my welcome in return, allowing her to be present, as she was clearly giving me, and all of you, a meaningful message in return. She was allowing herself to be open, innocent, flowing and trusting of everything, perfectly in alignment with today’s message.
Personally, I interpret the presence of the deer this way: as innocent energy that will do no harm to anyone, as good energy, in fact, and so I intend to keep the innocent self open to receive today, just as Jeanne suggests we do in the channeled message. I hope you will too, as this deer came for all of us!
Thanks for listening and being a part of this new shift that I am going through. And I’m very happy it was not a groundhog that showed up!