What are you carrying and why? What does not belong to you that you feel obligated to treasure and bear? What do you burden yourself with that was never yours to begin with? Free yourself by letting go of what does not belong to you, innerly and outerly, emotions and artifacts alike. Let go of what does not have meaning or value to you personally, and what belongs to someone else. It is not your responsibility to be the bearer of other people’s past selves or other people’s future selves. Let is all go and feel the wings of freedom emerge from your back where previously you carried all that stuff that did not belong to you. Ah! Freedom!
You are your own responsibility. Let there be no confusion about that. And yet, as human creatures, it is common to join in relationship or community, to share experiences and be as one. When this is so, responsibility is shared as well. But take care to not lose your individual self in the relationship or amidst the group, for you and your soul have a job to do that is individual, personal, and as equally important as that of others. Remind yourself often of your responsibility to your own journey and to your soul’s journey. Whatever it may be and wherever it takes you it’s why you are there, taking the journey of your lifetime. Discover it each day as you begin anew, focused once again on that prime need: to live your soul’s intent to the fullest, one day at a time. That’s your real responsibility!
How about a little more love and compassion? – Photo by Jan Ketchel
Our world has many separate parts that interact to maintain our wholeness. The reigning principle that holds us together is homeostasis, a tendency toward balance and stability. When one part of our world becomes extreme other parts of our world become extreme in the opposite direction in a compensatory effort to restore balance.
Currently, our world has devolved into such an extremist state of tenuous balance, with volatile groups expressing deep opposition to one another. The ability to appreciate the needs and perspectives of others in an effort to restore peaceful equilibrium is lost to our current circumstance.
Suspend judgment. In such time of extremism, all cling to the one-sidedness of their individual or group positions. The truth appears radically self-evident; the “other’s” view is clearly distorted and wrong. Emotion intensifies to convince, defend, and attack. Reason is stretched beyond reason. In fact, reason is one side of a pair of opposites, deeply suspect to many.
Realize that all the opposition outside ourselves courses equally through our inner selves. Here we can contribute to our own inner balance, as well as the greater world’s, by inwardly facing the one-sidedness of our own ego positions. Even the most contentious positions encapsulate some grain of truth. Our ego is charged to use its analytic and feeling capacities to find the value and necessary place for all parts of the self and the world.
Outwardly, we do well to not fall prey to blame and hate, as these reactions simply further and intensify the divide. Though we must stand firm to who we truly are, upholding our beliefs and values, we are equally free to feel compassion for all. Compassion is directed love energy, where all are acknowledged as legitimate parts of the whole.
Compassion can be expressed through civility. Regardless of the intensity of our beliefs or feelings we can treat each other with respect. This is an enormous task in these times of extremism where many say and do things that evoke strong visceral reactions within the self. Nonetheless, we can all take up the challenge to resist getting taken over and acting out our rageful impulses, verbally or otherwise. This act of containment keeps ego control above water, not causing further damage. Being civil may not result in a kind response, but it will at least not further inflame.
Next, the responsibility is to care for the self and the intense emotion suppressed within. Allow the self release in total private. A brisk walk, deep breathing and, yes, even throwing stones may be warranted. Once the emotional charge has diminished, reflect deeply on the source of inner activation. Something important is being revealed to the self in the emotional reaction. Know thyself, love thyself.
Love the part of the self that feels victimized, betrayed, or disempowered. Although you may choose to have no relationship or engagement with the triggering “other,” find compassion for them within the self, perhaps simply seeing them as a fellow human being struggling with human life. At that level we are all one.
Upholding civility is the bridge we have now, in these times of raging rivers that threaten to flood our civilization. Join in supporting this bridge, through action with civility.
One small change sets the ball rolling and before you know it you’re on your way. The opportunity to change comes again and again. In every day, in every moment it waits by your side wondering if this is the day, if this is the moment. It might not look like much or present as something big or tremendously transformative because often the first spark of change is no more than an inkling of an idea, a spark of insight, but even a spark has the potential to produce a raging fire. Let your own spark of insight inspire the first step on your changing journey and then the next and the next will easily follow. Just keep going. You never know where you’ll end up!
Be honest with yourself. You know you cannot really lie to yourself. Though you may try there is always a part of you that refuses to be tricked. Let that part take over now, guiding the way to new life as you shed the old and take on the new. There’s no time like today. Now could be the moment of change you’ve been waiting for, but it’s up to you. You are in control and you have the power. What more do you need?
