Resentment means, literally, to feel, with intensity, over and over again; resending to the self feelings that have affected it deeply. The actual feeling experienced in resentment is one of passionate anger and bitterness, held tightly, and felt enduringly, for perceived wrongs committed against the self.

Such emotional fixation and repetitive emotional experience rigidifies the heart, inhibiting the free flow of loving and compassionate energy.

The mind often replays incidents associated with its resentments, whereby refreshing their smoldering energy with renewed vigor that then seeks outlet in actual or imagined revenge.

As is evident from the current state of the world, resentments from centuries ago have led to fervent beliefs of entitlements, which are being played out in wars and conflicts throughout the globe. The family of nations and the oneness of the human race is overshadowed by a stage of separateness that is focused on individualistic needs, entitlements and resentments.

Behind all the material veils of physical life is the ultimate truth that all is One, that everyone is part of everything. This truth can only be lived when we emerge from our narcissistic shells and are able to be in love with, and of service to, the Greater One. The karma of separateness, as embodied in resentment, is love. Love is the acceptance of everything, which removes all barriers to Oneness.

The journey from resentment to love is a developmental process. The shamans of ancient Mexico discovered that the key to freeing the stuck energy of resentment lies with overcoming one’s self-importance. Self-importance must first be differentiated from self-esteem.

The essence of self-esteem is a measure of one’s self-confidence in the ability and capacity to face life’s challenges. Equally important is one’s ability to be in full acceptance of self, of all one’s strengths and weaknesses, as well as all that one has done, good or bad.

In contrast, self-importance is an egoic strategy of defense, which protects the ego self from feelings of inferiority and inadequacy. The self-important ego clings to its archetypal entitlements, as, for instance, in the expected love and support of parents, or in the right to have its needs met and not to be abused.

These are, of course, healthy archetypal expectations, however, they hardly address the fullness of reality conditions in Earth School, beginning with the universal experience of violent separation and trauma at birth. Regardless of our ultimate mission in an earthly incarnation, we have all chosen a milieu where the ego is always behind the eight ball. To graduate from Earth School we must arrive at total acceptance of everything, even the most unfair experiences.

To defend against the enormity of this challenge the ego employs self-importance, demanding to be compensated in some form for all the basic entitlements it has been denied. The ego’s resentments for violations to its self-importance might result in aggression expressed outwardly, or buried inwardly in a silent, bitter depression.

The ultimate goal for shamans is the total elimination of self-importance and maintenance of a healthy self-esteem that provides the confidence and clarity to face life’s challenges without attachment to the outcome. Success and failure are equal for shamans. There is no diminishment of self for failure, there’s simply acceptance of the truth without judgment. Healthy self-esteem has no need for self-importance; it acts from its own self-assuredness.

Shamans suggest using the  petty tyrants in one’s life to get over self-importance. Petty tyrants are those people or circumstances in our lives that offend us and drive us to resentment. The goal is to arrive at not being offended by the most offensive behaviors inflicted upon us. If we are not offended we gain utter clarity in how best to navigate a difficult person or situation.

Of course, we may need to safely release genuine primal screams of reaction for what we have endured. However, once released, rather than shift into resentment, we are strengthened in our confidence to come to full acceptance of the truth of our experience and fluidly take action to best address the circumstance we are in. Only the ego caught in self-importance suffers woundings and resentments, the High Self never does.

We don’t indulge in hate, but ultimately feel genuine love for our petty tyrant, a necessary teacher from the dark side, who has offered us such opportunity to shed the weight of resentment and hone our skills of navigation as we deepen our ability to further journey into infinity.

We might also employ the power of autosuggestion to gain release from the habit of resentment. The subconscious mind transforms resentments into habits as the conscious mind incessantly dwells upon them. If we raise our consciousness and freely choose to suggest love for all of our neighbors, we exercise the Divine spark at our disposal in the subconscious mind to transform resentment into love.

Shamans have also provided the recapitulation breath, the side to side bilateral breath that accompanies the reliving of encounters with petty tyrants and both neutralizes resentments and frees stuck energy for the ultimate journey of love, for every One.

And yes, we can set extremely firm boundaries with petty tyrants and still love them. These boundaries are not boundaries fueled by resentment. To the contrary, they are firm boundaries that reflect the truth of the heart.

In this infinite journey that we all traverse, the ultimate karma for all resentment is love. For how are we ever to advance without the total acceptance of everything that is all-inclusively an expression of the One?

Choose love, the ultimate free choice,

Chuck