Tag Archives: inner work

#723 Facing the Dispersion

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
What message of guidance do you offer us now?

This is a time of great culmination and dispersion. Imagine waves at sea, with no sight of land but far from any shore, slapping into each other, rising up in collision and confrontation, and yet there is little to do as a result of this clash but to sink back down into the great wide ocean once again. Such is the time of now, the time of culmination and dispersion, yet what is the deeper meaning?

Beyond returning to the unconscious, the great wide ocean of discontent, all of your experiences are meaningful for the moment, and far beyond as well.

All are challenged to take not only meaning from the events in life but to learn the lessons about the self those events send swirling up into awareness. The deep sea that does tend to the earth and its inhabitants in so many ways does also keep hidden the deeper meanings of life, evolutionary or otherwise.

I do not mean to confuse or speak only in metaphorical or allegorical terms, for I do not intend wasting words. I seek to expand awareness, to prod you, My Dear Readers, awake; to ask you to use your intuition and knowing to guide yourself more steadily through life—so bear with me. Who can you rely on to offer real advice? In truth, you must resort to the self, for only the self knows what lies deep inside you. You must, if you are to evolve, find the means of allowing the self to express, to be expressed and fully known, both inside and outside the self.

This inner process requires a good dose of humility, a large portion of innocence, and the ability—learned, practiced or innate—to trust that you can allow the energy inside you to guide you, as the waves upon the sea, to the point of culmination and dispersion.

It is only through calling up the deeper truths of the self, often by force, that the spreading of them will occur. In forcing the self to face the deeply sunken treasures of truth, long buried or otherwise hidden, the next step in personal growth may have a chance.

That next step is facing the dispersion I speak of. To face this kind of dispersion requires affording the self the deepest respect, first of all. Only with deep respect for the self will you be able to take seriously all that shoots forth and falls around you as your inner and outer waves crash and disperse.

In honesty must your self-respect be guided to acceptance of all that lies floating about on the waters that are your life. You see, you are but nature itself, like the ocean, with things seen on the surface and things hidden below, even to the very bottom and beyond, in the muck that lies far beyond normal reach. You are nature itself and as such you have within you the same forces that nature bears. These include unknown forces that emerge when you least expect them, forces that will shake you awake and ask you to humbly step back, to look at your life in all its broken bits and pieces floating like debris upon the ocean top. These forces ask you to accept that indeed these doings are honestly my own, and then to allow this humble self to accept the responsibility for not just picking up the pieces and putting them away. No, the real process of clean up after a storm is to examine how this storm happened, whether it was conscious or unconscious, and to use those fragments of self to build a new more naturally acceptable self.

All humans are innocent beings at the core. All fear life, as much as they fear death, yet do they too easily elect to pretend that neither is that important. Caught in an alternate reality of sameness, they lose sight of the truth of life. They forget they are the ocean and the moon and stars alike. They forget they are innocent beings with the forces of nature rocking inside them. They quell and soothe this true nature. They pretend it could not possibly exist, that what they experience could not be true. “How could this happen?” they ask. “This could not happen to me!” they cry. “What did I do to deserve this?” they wonder.

In truth, if you look at your life as the ocean itself you may be able to better understand the reflection of self as nature. If you prefer, look to the sky, for it too is like the ocean. One lies above and one below, yet do they offer the same opportunities for growth. They offer the opportunity to look beyond what you see before your frightened eyes. They ask you to pierce the surface of your world and explore what lies beyond.

My advice for you, My Dear Ones, is to continue piercing your own world. Do not accept it simply because it presents itself in one form or image. Look at your life and remind yourself that though this is my life at this moment, it is but the surface that I must break through. I must use the forces of nature inside me to explore my inner world for guidance but also for direction.

One must be ready to undertake the shattered bits and pieces of flotsam and jetsam that float upon the ocean of life as indeed that which is laid before the self to examine. This is indeed a time of energetic self-examination. If you take a moment to study the self you may find that your culmination has already occurred. It may have happened years ago when you least expected it and since then you have been trying to put the pieces together again, in the same way, attempting to re-form an old image. However, that is not possible. The only thing to do now is to accept that a new world, a new self is called for. A new self must be prepared now.

A new life must be created from the dispersed self. But be sure to keep in mind also that this is the opportunity you have waited for, the moment of decision you have longed for. Do not miss it this time. Do yourself the honor of doing it differently!

Please feel free to post comments or respond to this message from Jeanne in the post/read comments section below.

Fondly and innocently offered.

#721 Prepare for a Long Winter’s Meeting

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
The signs of autumn are early upon us this year in the Northeast. The leaves are changing their colors and dropping to the ground, the grass has mostly stopped growing and after a dry summer the spiders are coming into the house looking for warm crevices to winter over in. Our personal activities, conscious or unconscious, reflect this time as we prepare for the darkness that now comes earlier and earlier each day. Perhaps we notice this incremental change in season more strikingly this year due to its early arrival. Perhaps we are at an age of appreciation for the chance to draw inward once again after the warm and largely external lives we have led during the summer months. As Chuck wrote about, this is the time of Po, of breaking down and dissolution, yet it does not carry sadness with it, only the looking forward to what comes next as we enter a time of turning inward with the prospect of deep reflection and study ahead.

The moon, recently shining so brightly at night, stresses that this time of death and dissolution is also brightly lit, that there is indeed light in the darkness, and if we allow ourselves to wake up during the night we see that everything we experience in the day is still there at night, though illuminated by a different light, thus allowing us to see it differently too. In the night and in the darkness we have the opportunity to explore differently if we choose to wake from our slumber and look into that darkness. This is all metaphor for doing inner work, of course.

I can’t help but notice that nature is setting everything up for us, perhaps a little earlier this year because nature itself requires that we human beings become more innerly focused and reflective over all. It is telling us that it is time once again to face our personal darkness and resolve our inner issues so that when the spring comes we will be in synch with the new life all around us. No matter what happens to us or to the world over the next few months new life is certain. That too is the insight of the time of Po.

With all of that in mind, Jeanne, what message do you offer us human beings at this time of preparation for turning inward, as we enter a new phase? Whether we like it or not we must go inward now. I feel this strongly on a personal level, but also perhaps even more strongly on a universal scale. Great change in the human race feels pressingly required and exceedingly important. I feel we are truly being confronted to do the work of transforming ourselves. Within each of our inner worlds we have the opportunity to do this work. Then the challenge becomes bringing it into our outer worlds. This is a long monologue leading up to asking for your guidance, specific to this time, which is both personal and universal. What guidance do you offer us today and in the weeks ahead?

Metaphor, My Dear, is a fine vehicle for teaching, yet at this time it is most important that practical and pragmatic decisions be made or your inward turning will have dire consequences. It is a time of staying in reality. Even though, as you state, it is of utmost importance to accept the darkness that comes creeping into your awareness, so is it equally important, if not more so, to accept the fact that you cannot go into that darkness unprepared.

What do you mean by “dire consequences?”

To be unprepared for the onslaughts of the inner world could lead to shutting down, to fear, to disaster. Be always conscious that the outer world reflects the inner world, but be also conscious that beneath the cold earth the seeds of spring wait patiently, holding in the energy of new life. However, one must prepare for that which is present at each moment until that time of birth. One must guard one’s energy in a healthy manner and go forth, not haphazardly, flippantly, or inflatedly, but soberly, with focus on the moment in hand, at all times.

You must, each one of you, prepare for what lies ahead. You already know what that means. You cannot have lived even a few years upon that earth without recognizing the change of seasons. Now however, as adults, you are more aware that you must be responsible for the self. You must be as the animals in nature that have been busily preparing for this certainty of darkness, of cold shutting down and hibernation; their entire lives revolve around this activity. They are conditioned to this moment, for it is as important as the fact that they do live. Without this instinct to survive there would be no new life.

As adults, your natural instincts must now be brought forth. Where is your own instinct to not only survive but to do so with impunity, impeccably, but also with desire to be your natural self?

As you prepare for the time ahead, as the season changes once again, remain aware, alert to the behaviors of the self that have become so natural to you but are not in fact nature at its core inside you. Inspect your process for habitual tendencies that do not actually have anything to do with the true desires of the self, with survival, or with inner work. Inspect your inner nature for what it truly needs to be doing to prepare for the time of inward turning. Your true nature, your spirit self, absent of society, of ego, and of attachment to the things of that world, might actually surprise you with what it truly wants. I can guarantee that it wishes for expression in some manner.

Do not “think” about this expression, do not give it tools, but allow it access to life simply by intending, by opening the doors of your mind and your physical self without judgments, without old ideas or behaviors, but simply allowing the self to “know” that this spirit self exists. And the other thing is, do not think that you know this side of the self, because you don’t. You may have inklings, you may hear it calling, but you do not fully know this self, because it has not yet fully lived. In order to live fully it must be released and that is a high order.

In order to prepare for your inward months of spirit work, you must balance that time in practicalities. You must prepare for the winter ahead. Do what you must in your own world and environment to set yourself up for this time. In all matters be pragmatic. At the same time, question your automatic reactions, responses, and habits. Do things differently now, by allowing your conscious mind to disseminate that which has not been working for you so that you may be open to the guidance that will come from your new acquaintance, your spirit self. Allow yourself to flow naturally during this time, by both accepting the changes in your outer world, without sorrow and attachment, but also by acquiescing to the quiet stirrings of your inner process.

Do not reach for the normal comforts of the darkness. Reach instead for the discipline to stay present with what your spirit shines its light upon. And do not pretend that you are safe in your world, because that is too complacent. Instead, challenge yourself to be constantly alert and aware of the fact that nothing ever stops challenging you. Be as aware as the animals that predators lurk all around you. They may be as familiar as your own habits, or they may be as foreign as disaster striking, but do not for a moment pretend they do not seek you out. You are not special.

This is a time of closing down, yet is it also a time of confrontation with what comes next. This is where your adult self and your spirit self must remain alert and cognizant as they confront each other in the darkening light and challenge each other to lay down their arms and sit at the conference table for a long conversation about the truth of the self. This is the meeting that must convene in order for change to become acceptable, for this time to be productive, and for each one of you to offer the self transformative work.

Come to your meeting fully prepared by being open and nonjudgmental. Allow each part of the self to speak. But, the number one rule at this conference is that only the truth be spoken. It may take a while to reveal that truth, but it lies at the center of your world, waiting to be discovered like the seed in the ground.

Autumn is inward turning time. Begin your preparation for a long winter’s meeting. Consciously or unconsciously you are all headed there. It is your choice in how you approach this time. I wish you the best of luck. I wish you openness, but above all, I wish that you may face your truths fearlessly, honestly, kindly, and lovingly toward the self.

Please feel free to post comments or respond to this message from Jeanne in the post/read comments section below.

Offered humbly, in service.

#717 The Pulse of the Universe Inside You

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Today feels like the day we have all been waiting for, the culmination of a long and serious transition time. This morning I pulled a Tarot card and received The Chariot, a fine affirmation of all my personal intentions to live, work, and be within the flow of nature, both calm and flowing but also in motion, constantly daring myself to go beyond my limitations. This card is perfectly in alignment with where I am at this moment in time.

Drawing this Tarot card struck at the heart of change as I personally enact it in my life, setting my intent from a calm place of heart, yet remaining fully aware that I must push myself and sometimes even force myself to stick with my well-laid and well-intentioned plans. While I feel a shift today I also know that challenges will arise because that is the nature of the universe and it is how we are shown where our path lies. I know that I must stay connected to my intentions and on my path, but that I must also be alert, aware, and prepared for anything.

Perhaps many of your readers are starting this week in a similar state of calm determination, feeling the shift in energy as I am. Can you offer us advice for the week ahead as we set our intentions to flow, while at the same time we know full well that there will be challenges ahead?

My Dear Jan and All My Readers, find your heart center as you begin each day, taking but a few moments to locate and feel the intensity of this calm place that lies within each of you. This is nature at the core of each of you, the pulse of the universe inside you. This universe you speak of is not outside of you, but deeply embedded inside you.

This is the first thing to note: Your challenges come from within. Even though you may notice them being mirrored outside in the world and the people around you, and in your daily lives unfolding, note that they originate inside you, conjured by your spirit urging you to confront that which holds you back. The universe and all of nature lie at your heart center. Visiting this place daily will set you on your path and invite openness to that which comes, for you will, in your openheartedness, recognize your challenges as perfectly matched to where you are in your life. There will always be something to get beyond, to work through—and it will always be something personally important or it would not be there confronting you each day—until you have solved the riddle of it to your heart’s content.

The second thing to note is: Each day you must also make note of the energy outside of you, for it will also show you how your inner process must be conducted. You must learn to read the energy outside of you, in the atmosphere, in nature, but foremost in the people you come in contact with. You must learn to assess what is happening for others in your proximity and adjust your expectations and your own energetic output to both accommodate and challenge this outer energy. You must find balance between your self and your outer world without compromising your intentions to change and grow.

It is a good idea to consider the self as a separate being with a separate inner process that must be attended to. But remember that the inner self is not the ego self. It is not one of the archetypal personality functions of the psyche, but the spiritual self who adjusts and flows without attachments, without demands, without really revealing itself, but simply flowing with what comes, even though it is absolutely in the fore, in charge so to speak.

In directing your inner and outer worlds from your heart-centered inner spirit self, using your knowledge of how change needs time to unfold, to present challenges, and to be worked through, you will both maintain good balance and forward movement toward not only culmination, as you mention Jan, but transformation, so that you go beyond it to a new level.

And, of course, when you reach that new level you start all over again, challenging the self to change and grow some more, for that is life. But also, at each level, you are more aware, more firmly heart-centered, flowing more easily, and more firmly grounded in who you are, why you are there, and what you are meant to do with your life.

Good Luck. Ask for guidance in the form of balance, in the form of inner calm, and in the form of daring, so that you might push through all that appears before you.

#713 Understanding Change

Jan Ketchel channeling Jeanne Marie Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Today I ask for guidance for everyone, as we continue our journeys and whether we notice how we are affected by the outer energy or not. What message do you have for us?

Do not forget why you are there, why you live now upon that earth. If you feel you have not discovered your purpose, I can give you an inkling of what it might be: You are all there to grow and evolve as energy beings. You are there to change. You are there to push the self constantly to change.

So, how can you change today? Look at your life with clear and truthful eyes. You do know what, and where, needs immediate release and shift in your life. This is where you must start. And in order to start you must confront your fears as they arise. In order to confront your fears you must dare the self to move in a new direction, incrementally if there is no possibility of great change at the moment.

If you are in a position to both foresee and precipitate drastic change, I ask that you remain calm, deliberate and slow in your progress. If you are not in a position to enact drastic change at this moment, I ask that you also respond to the urgings of your spirit with slow, deliberate and thoughtful steps.

Change, in order to have an effect in your life, must be undertaken with conscious and calculated actions, based not on fear of confrontation, or on the need to flee, but only because it is right.

A determination that change is necessary must first become acceptable in order for enactment of change to be right. If you are not yet of the mind that change is indeed what life requires then it is time to stay only with inner work. Inner work will lead to outer action, but until the inner self is in alignment with words of great meaning and impact—that will result in taking action—it is not possible to truly change.

You see what I am saying? No matter what you read or hear, from my words or from others who seek to guide, your personal journey of change will not proceed if you have not come to an inner understanding of what it means to truly change.

I, and others who speak of spirit, of energy, and of evolutionary growth, do not propose that an individual react simply to advice as it is spelled out. My words are presented merely as thoughts to propose to the inner self, thoughts that may provoke an awakening. No awakening or deeper activity will happen, however, if you have not allowed your inner process to guide you more than what you hear outside of you. Your personal inner work is really all that matters and all that you must pay attention to.

Although the outer energy may propose that change is necessary, it is only by sitting in stillness with the inner self that you will know if change at this moment is right for you. Take time to be quiet and thoughtful, but most of all be patient with yourself, both your inner self and your outer self.

Your outer self may be restless and urging you to do something that your inner self is not ready for, or that your inner self knows is not right. Only by allowing these two selves to interact will you be in a position to know such things.

If you are looking to change the self today, this is the first place to begin, by changing how you interact with the two selves. That will be work enough!

I do not mean to suggest that outer activity requires much attention, except as it may guide to inner exploration. As you grow and feel that the world outside of you is less interesting, as your ego fulfills its duties and shows you the importance of spirit, so may you discover that inner work is where change may be enacted. This is a lifelong process and one that deserves attention.

A Day in a Life: Recapitulation & Infinity

Over the past few weeks I have written about recapitulation as both a shamanic journey and as undertaking the inner journey, doing deep psychological work. Today, I touch on the other experiences that arise as one undertakes recapitulation and deep inner work, the experiences of infinity: of spirit, of channeling, of visions, of seeing and experiencing energy. Infinity presented as a shamanic or spiritual term, really boils down to experiencing the self as energy, interconnected to all other energy, having experiences that cannot be defined in rational terms.

Carlos Castaneda writes, in The Active Side of Infinity, that he did not have explanations for the effects his recapitulation was having on him, that when facing the unknown and being confronted with things he did not have interpretations for he could not find a means of describing them. Don Juan presented him with a new source of interpretation by telling him that “infinity, or the voice of the spirit,” would come to his aid. He writes:

“Don Juan has guided me to accept the idea that infinity was a force that had a voice and was conscious of itself. Consequently, he had prepared me to be ready to listen to that voice and act efficiently always, but without antecedents, using as little as possible of the railings of the a priori. I waited impatiently for the voice of the spirit to tell me the meaning of my recollections, but nothing happened.” (p. 169)

As he goes on to recapitulate more memories of how he had behaved towards others in his life he finally arrives at the following: “I didn’t have to ponder anymore the significance of my vivid visions. For an unquestionable certainty invaded me, as if coming from outside me.” (p. 172) He goes on to explain how he discovered that the dictums he had been brought up with had overtaken him, what he had been taught driving his every action; so deeply ingrained they became necessities. This realization is his turning point. He goes on to say:

“I was aware, beyond any doubt, that what was at stake was infinity. Don Juan had portrayed it as a conscious force that deliberately intervenes in the lives of sorcerers. And now it was intervening in mine. I knew that infinity was pointing out to me, through the vivid recollections of those forgotten experiences, the intensity and depth of my drive for control, and thus preparing me for something transcendental to myself. I knew with frightening certainty that something was going to bar any possibility of my being in control, and that I needed, more than anything else, sobriety, fluidity, and abandon in order to face the things that I felt were coming to me.” (p. 172)

Don Juan admonishes Carlos to not get caught in “psychological exaggeration,” but to accept that he had entered an irreversible process. “Your true mind is emerging, waking up from a state of lifelong lethargy,” he says. Carlos writes:

Infinity is claiming you,” he [don Juan] continued. “Whatever means it uses to point that out to you cannot have any other reason, any other cause, any other value than that. What you should do, however, is to be prepared for the onslaughts of infinity. You must be in a state of continuously bracing yourself for a blow of tremendous magnitude. That is the sane, sober way in which sorcerers face infinity.” (pp. 172-3)

Carlos proceeded to do what most of us do when faced with the “onslaughts of infinity,” he got busy, immersing himself in work, in writing, in anything to keep infinity at bay. During my own recapitulation I too used all my energy to keep infinity from invading and seeping into my life, until finally, out of sheer exhaustion, I realized it was hopeless. There was nothing I could do to keep it away, including my connection with Jeanne, which both greatly aided me and frightened me at the same time. My own experiences mirror what don Juan described to Carlos in the following excerpt, as he talked about the results of going into inner silence:

“He assured me that a dot of a peculiar, rich, pomegranate red shows up, as if bursting from the lavender clouds. He stated that as sorcerers become more disciplined and experienced, the dot of pomegranate expands and finally explodes into thoughts or visions, or in the case of a literate man, into written words; sorcerers either see visions engendered by energy, hear thoughts being voiced as words, or read written words.” (p. 174)

Carlos went on to have an experience of words moving at tremendous speed, impossible to read. After his experience he rushed to tell don Juan about what had happened to him, as I once rushed to Chuck, needing anchoring in this reality. Don Juan assured him that he had had his first encounter with infinity and although its descent was not gentle, it was nonetheless how it appeared and that Carlos was going to have to learn how to adjust to its onslaughts. In my own case, I too had to learn how my connection with Jeanne was meant to be utilized, what it really meant for me personally, but also what I was supposed to be doing with it: what I was being shown and why by infinity.

Carl Jung also experienced the “onslaughts of infinity,” and many of his psychological terms and tools come from these personal experiences. The Red Book is his personal journey into the unconscious, into what don Juan called inner silence, the place where we are offered access to that which lies beyond the rational world, which has so structured and defined our perceptions.

In The Red Book, on pages 230-231, Jung contrasted “the spirit of the time” with “the spirit of the depths” as two opposing forces that must be reconciled with, the outer rational world with the inner unknown world. When he asked “the spirit of the depths” to give him a sign that it was right to no longer resist its call, he received a two hour long vision that happened in broad daylight. This was the beginning of his journey back to his soul, for he could not resist this “onslaught of infinity.”

In daring to take the inner journey, whether it be called recapitulation or inner work, reliving memories or doing active imagination, both Carlos and Carl entered other worlds, as real as this one. Despite initial fear and resistance, in finally acquiescing to the “onslaughts of infinity,” they both perceived and experienced energy differently. Their lives changed when they chose to take the journey with infinity leading the way, as both resource and guide.

If you wish, feel free to share or comment in the Post Comment section below.

Sending you all love and good wishes,
Jan

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