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Messages from Jeanne, Questions for Jeanne

#528 A Process of Self-Forgiveness

Jeanne Marie Ketchel
Channeled by Jan Ketchel

Today, another reader asks a question.

Dear Jan/Jeanne,
I have had many very human experiences in the last year. They range from the desire to live a life of fulfillment, which led me to speak my truth for the first time in my marriage and begin the process of detaching from that relationship, to throwing myself into my business and home, to supporting a friend as she released her human life. Life and death, and all else in between, have been with me this year. Intellectually, I understand that this is the continuum; life, death, rebirth. Even before I could explain that, I knew I had been here before and so this always made sense to me. What I want to understand is how do I hold that knowledge, honor that knowledge, in the midst of all the human experiences that I am here to partake in? How do I honor my exquisite energy while my human body craves connection and pulls me into pathways of comfort? How do I walk away from a life that holds so much wonder and pain into a life that is better for my eternal soul? Intuitively, I also know that whatever I do will benefit my soul, and it may speed up or slow down the process. There seems to be this idea that only the soul should matter, but what of the body and its needs? What of the mind and its awareness? I feel as though I will miss things if I only focus on the needs of my soul. I want to enjoy my life in all its glorious expressions, on all levels of my eternal self, mind, body, and spirit. How do I embrace all of these?

Anonymous

My Dearest One, you address the struggles of all humans, who are aware of their spiritual and eternal selves, to maintain balance and yet continue to grow. Is it not possible to do all that you so eagerly desire? Is it not possible to be so human and so spiritually aware simultaneously? I contend that it is. However, there is a process of forgiveness that must be undertaken in order to achieve this balance. This forgiveness I speak of is not the forgiveness that you might equate with actions taken and regretted. The forgiveness I speak of is self-forgiveness; so that you may fully embrace the journey you are on and allow the self to really be as free and embracing of all aspects of the self that you so desire.

Forgiveness of self is a process of learning to detach from the structures of life imposed by society and the inner self who remains caught in old places. This inner self who confronts the “pathways of comfort,” as you call them, is the self who must release its energy and allow for growth.

Who is this inner self inside you, personally, My Dear One? This is the self who must be addressed, embraced, fully pondered, and become known, so that a new comfort in fully trusting the self may take over and allow for full expression in life. Is this self a frightened and reluctant child, or a taciturn baby? Is it a demanding inner self who, in spite of all that life presents, continually refuses to give up the old comforts, though it sees clearly the life and energy that is available if it does so? Are you caught in several areas of old comfort, many strands of reluctance and fear? This is not an uncommon place to be.

The adult self is the facilitator of this self-forgiveness that I speak of, the intelligent and mature adult self who does, in fact, gravitate toward as much enjoyment of life as it does gravitate toward the enjoyments of the spiritual aspects of life. The rituals of the inner process, the old comforts, are as binding and fulfilling as the rituals undertaken on a spiritual path. So you see, My Dear One, if you are struggling to release the self, you are going to have to confront the deeply embedded rituals in your life. These rituals may range from the simplest and most apparent, such as the process of waking up and having tea or coffee, to the ritual of standing still in the middle of your busy day to take a breath and connect with the inner you, asking the outer you to slow down a minute and breathe in new energy.

Rituals bind us all to habits that may be good or bad for us, comfortable or uncomfortable, desired or undesirable, fulfilling or unfulfilling, beneficial or damaging. But also keep in mind that no matter what the consequences of our habits in life are, they are giving us the experiences we need, showing us things about ourselves that we must learn, though it may take us a long time to notice that we are, indeed, living a ritualistic life, rather than an evolutionary one.

This, My Dear, is what you are confronting in the self as you experience change, new life, death, energy, and the needs of the human self to excel and experience the grandeur of the world you live in, along with the deeply emotional aspects of life. You may begin to notice that much of your life has been reduced to ritual, to habit, to pathways of comfort that do not necessarily lead to growth. These are the areas of life that must change in order for evolution to supercede ritual, for detachment and self-forgiveness to take place, and for a greater balance to be experienced. To actualize this eagerness for a fully lived life in all aspects of self, as you so desire, I do contend that change must happen.

You are well on the way to making changes in your life, My Dear One, and these changes are good examples of connecting with the inner truth of the spirit. If your true spirit is suppressed your true energy for life is also suppressed. If your rituals take over your life, your spirit will remain bound in the repetition of those rituals, unable to free itself from the wheels of life turning endlessly in the same direction. When your spirit comes knocking and throwing wrenches into your wheels, it is time to stop everything and look at how your wheels have been spinning. Have your wheels been free-flying, spinning out of control without stopping, because you fear that if you stop there will be nothing there at all, or perhaps only the skeletal remains of once beautiful wheels of comfort? Are you afraid that you may miss out or be too late for something if you do not keep your wheels spinning at the current pace?

In order to enact change, the wheels must stop. The rituals must be dismantled and examined for truth of need. The ego self must relinquish its desires to the true desires of the inner spirit self, the mature spirit self who, though firmly in adult reality, is also openly trusting of the innocent side of itself as well. It is in combination of true ego self and true spirit self that forgiveness, detachment, and fulfillment of life will happen.

New rituals may seek to inhabit the spaces left by old habits as they are dismantled. In order for true growth to happen these spaces must become spirit-filled energy spaces. As old habits are left behind a period of loneliness and emptiness may ensue, until the ego relinquishes its hold on the desire to replace one ritual with another and instead allows the inner spirit to take over. The balance that you seek, and that every spirit seeks, is awareness of self in constant flux, able to flow through life, fully participating, fully aware, fully alive, fully enjoying and living freely. I do not want to discourage anyone from living and enjoying life, yet do I also not want to stifle the inner spirit’s quest for life as well. How do you give ego self and spirit self equal time and space? How do they sit side by side so that the wheels of ritual and habit turn into wheels of energy? This is the work that must continually be undertaken:

1. Question the validity of the rituals. Are they necessary and truly fulfilling?

2. Stop spinning your wheels and take a look at what they are made of. Perhaps they are not what you thought they were, for they were picked up for usage such a long time ago.

3. Confront the self regarding the changes already enacted and the experiences already granted.

4. Determine, with knowing spirit self and knowing adult ego self, which changes are beneficial and resonant with both and which changes are not even close to fulfillment.

5. Walk in the direction that the signs, the truths, and the experiences in life are pointing you in and follow this new path.

6. The point of self-forgiveness now comes to greet you, as the next step must be detachment from that which no longer nurtures either the spirit self or the ego self. This will be very clear, though it will also be very difficult to process. It will entail the aspects of self that are not only reluctant, but truly afraid. Self-forgiveness is the act of the balanced self giving permission to move on with the changes that may be so painfully proposed and shown. To grant the self permission to move on is the point when the old wheels will be fully seen as no longer adequate.

7. The next step is to hold onto awareness of self in transition, without pulling toward the self new rituals, new wheels, or new comforts. This is a time of tension. To maintain the stability of the self in this time of emptiness is the challenge, for only in holding at bay the old voices and keeping out the old stuff, that will come asking for re-entry, will you be able to fully embrace and enact change. This time of tension-bearing will be a great challenge.

8. This will require learning what it means to truly detach from the world as you know it and turn toward the possibility of a new world, though it may not yet be in sight. This step into the void will be the most difficult, for it will involve learning to trust the inner guidance that may, at times, appear to offer strange or unusual advice. This time of trust, however, will lead to the next step in evolutionary growth, which will be:

9. The acceptance of the self as individual, as wholly self-contained, self-aware, self-sufficient, and trustworthy. This acceptance of self will lead to a new energy. As the old powerhouses of energy no longer function, as emptiness occurs, as the old is no longer invited in to contaminate the self with useless rituals and comforts, a new energy will begin to seep in. This is the energy of spirit in balance with ego and as this energy enters the heart, the mind, the very bloodstream of the body, you will discover that you are different. This moment of awareness of self as different, as changed, as acting now from a new post of command will lead to the ultimate goal and that is:

10. Fulfillment of self in new awareness, innerly connected, outerly connected, energetically connected, and available to truly embrace the life that you are so eager to live.

My Dear One, I see your struggles to embrace the wholeness of self, yet must I caution that to do so too quickly will result in disaster, for only in truly allowing all aspects of self to be present and ready to take the journey will true fulfillment be reached. If even one tiny aspect of the self is not ready to participate there will be difficulty in achieving the proper energy to fully live, as you so desire.

I know this process of balance takes work; it takes slowing down; it takes inner trust, and it takes ego-busting, to a great extent. It takes confronting the sadnesses in life, and the emptiness and loneliness of taking a journey alone for as long as it takes to connect with the true self and truth of the self. But each step of the process of gaining balance is filled with gifts of insight, experience, and energy.

This is quite a subject and quite a question! It is quite a quest, I might add; the quest for fulfillment, for life, for growth, and for completion. I advise, with a final punctuation, that those of you who are so eager to fully embrace life, as this reader is, offer your selves the gift of self-forgiveness, for this is truly at the root of all change and all evolution. For without being able to let go of the old self there will be no ability to find and allow a new self to become real. And this is what you seek, the real self.

News and Notes

The Tibetan Book of the Dead

Greetings!
A reader of Jeanne’s messages was kind enough to send us a copy of The Tibetan Book of the Dead, narrated by Leonard Cohen and orginally released on VHS in 1994. It was re-released on DVD in 2004 and is now available in a new 2009 DVD release. I have added it to our store during this synchronistically appropriate time. May it aid and enlighten you further on your quest for understanding and completion as it takes you through the stages of death according to the Tibetan Buddhist tradition.

We look forward to continuing our work with Jeanne and sharing it with you. Thanks for reading!

Jan and Chuck

Messages from Jeanne

#527 I Am a Being Who is Going to Die

Jeanne Marie Ketchel
Channeled by Jan Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Today, I am following up on last week’s message from a reader, as well as the current topic of death as advisor. In a response to Message #523 the following query was posed: “I don’t understand how I can truly live in my energy body when I am in my human form. Do you mean that I must cultivate out of body experiences?”

In general, I would like to ask you to respond to this question regarding establishing a practice of maintaining a balance between our inner spiritual world and energy exploration while we also seek to grow and evolve in this world, taking into consideration the shaman’s statement that Chuck spoke about in his Saturday blog #526: I am a being who is going to die. Can you give us additional guidance regarding this balancing act, in light of this statement of the shamans of Carlos Castaneda’s lineage?

My Dear Ones, in the face of death, would you live your life differently? If you knew, for certain, that you would die tomorrow, would you do, act, say, or accomplish something special? I pose these questions in order to jolt your awareness to the fact that, as the shamans of Chuck’s world do say: I am a being who is going to die. Each day you are, in truth, facing your death, yet do you ask your self the questions that I pose?

If you ask your self the question, “what will I do today as I face my death?” you may discover that you will live your life quite differently. Without awareness of death facing you each day, however, the complacency of everyday life removes the significance and the certainty of death from before your eyes. It is up to each one of you to open your eyes, remove the veils, and speak directly to your own mortality in this manner, each day, in order to more fully live a balanced life of awareness.

If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, would you make amends, take leave of loved ones, and prepare your self for what lies ahead? Or would you refuse to accept the possibility, even though it was so blatantly stated as a certainty? I address the certainty of it, as do the shamans of Chuck’s world. You are a being who is going to die. With that certainty in mind, how do you wish to live your life?

As Jeanne Marie Ketchel, I was given the gift of that certainty and I focused my attention on creating a balance in my life so that I could find enough strength to remain upon that earth, as long as possible, while simultaneously exploring other aspects of energy. I did focus upon the activities of certain death as proposed by the same shamans of Chuck’s world. I did embrace and learn from the wise teachings of many who had gone before, transitioning into energy, learning how to understand the process, with the certainty that I would be facing my death sooner than I would have liked.

In order to maintain a more focused balance in your lives, My Dear Ones, I ask you to pose not only the statement of the shamans to your self each day, but also the questions of how you will live now that you are aware that your own death transition is a certainty. Will you express your love and appreciation in far greater magnitude? Will you look for the beauty that surrounds you and envelopes your being? Will you show your self as fearless, impeccable, and a fighter, while at the same time you face the inevitable with the courage of an ancient one, who knows that death will come when the time is right? Will you seek better understanding of the need to detach and leave that world, while simultaneously seeking awareness in energy form?

Why must you wait for death to come knocking before you mature into such a warrior of life? You see, My Dear Ones, though you may, in fact, live for many years, your life may be richer, happier, more fulfilled, more loving and compassionate if you can hold in your awareness the certainty that your death is imminent. I suggest, as the shamans of Chuck’s world do, that such awareness alone is enough to shift you into better balance. This is the awareness that you seek, My Dear Reader; the perfect awareness to shift you into a being who is going to die, into a being who, by making that statement and keeping it uppermost in your mind, will discover that balance in life, body, and spirit, may be achieved.

To live your life upon that earth constantly preparing for your death, with awareness, is quite a gift. You are offered the opportunity of such a gift without having to deal with the challenges of disease. Or perhaps this may be the catalyst that you do receive, as I did, yet are you also being offered a healing opportunity each day that you remain present in that world. I ask you, My Dear Ones, to live your lives in balance, with this awareness, so that you may have the healing opportunities that will arise from such focus. With awareness that death is present at all times, your life will become a different life.

So, in conclusion, I ask you to allow the awareness of death to be the catalyst that shifts you into the balance that you struggle with. Once you accept death as your daily companion, teacher, and protagonist, so may you allow for it to show you the way to live. For you will, in fact, choose to live differently in the face of your demise. I guarantee you will live differently, even if it is to find your sadness, your connection to that life, and your habitual needs that so deeply seek to show you that they keep you grounded, while your spirit seeks to show you how to lighten your burden, and how to live a compassionate life, as a loving being.

In death do you face eternal life. Are you ready to experience that, even now, as you lift your feet and walk your path? Are you ready to look upon each and every thing in your world for the last time, in full awareness that this may, indeed, be the last time?

This is the lesson of the shamans of Chuck’s world, the wise ones who teach that you are energy now and forever, in life and in death; however, your awareness of this is overshadowed by the veils and structures of that world. Death may remove them and reveal your true potential, but why wait to access that which is innate and eager to partake of life now? Is it not ironic that in facing your death you are offered access to true life, the energy of eternal living?

I contend that in keeping awareness of imminent death in front of you, each day, your balance will naturally establish itself. As you look upon your world, with death at your side, you will almost automatically discover the impeccable warrior you truly are. Your alignment as body and energy will adjust itself, so that your puzzlement in how to become more balanced will resolve, for it is most natural to be balanced.

I am a being who is going to die. Keep your awareness of death at your door and act from this place of imminent demise and transition. Awareness of death is your catalyst to healing and living all of your truths. It is all you need to set you on the path of change and growth as you ask your self to face your truths, each moment of each day, fully aware.

Messages from Jeanne

#525 Death is Your Most Desirable Teacher & Traveling Companion

Jeanne Marie Ketchel
Channeled by Jan Ketchel

Dear Jeanne,
Although I don’t wish to be morbid or focus too much on death, it is interesting that the subject has come up a lot this week. Do you have any final words to impart regarding this transformational energy that seems to, indeed, be quite noticeably present this week?

In energetic terms, I do not regard death as morbid at all, but only as transformational. Death also occurs in small ways, as one travels the path of life, whether it be one of awareness or not. Small transitions of change present one with the lessons that death teaches us all in its great final push of urgency to go for the ultimate transition into pure energy. At that time we are asked to accept the truth of our evolutionary potential and to remain aware of the possibilities ahead.

Look now upon your experiences of death as small awakenings. As with all awakenings the impact will only be truly transitional if you maintain awareness of your experiences and of the progress you have made. These small lessons are good preparation for remembering to hold onto such awareness rather than fall back into the veils of oblivion. If you fall back into the veils you will lose the awareness, forgetting that you have already awoken many times. The slumber of complacency in ordinary life is a deeper sleep than death, for it means many lifetimes in the veils must be spent. Death is the opportunity for new life.

I ask that you hold onto your awareness of death, the companion who walks beside you, a silent enigma, a teacher showing you its transitional potential, pointing out the beauty of its energy. Ask your self now to be aware of the light ahead. Direct your attention, now focused on fear and loss, to the evolutionary potential of the journey that every one of you must one day take. Do not be afraid to begin your preparations for death even as you do the work of awakening the self to the beauty of life. Each day as you do your spiritual work, your awareness training, you are preparing for your death. Though you may feel that you are seeking life and its full potential, so are you training your awareness for this ultimate moment, the test of your awareness to hold on during this time of such consequence.

Understand that the vigor you gain access to during this time of spiritual awakening is the energy you will encounter tenfold (at least) as you transition into your energy body. But will you remember that this is so? Will you understand that you are at the great moment of change, not in a negative place by a very positive one? Each day, as you access your energy and take it back for your own usage, you are experiencing death and the energy gained by leaving your body, incrementally speaking. If you can hold onto the awareness that death is energy, perhaps you will be able to travel forward now, keeping awareness of death as your most desirable companion, rather than the one to be most feared.

Does this help you to accept death as part of your journey? Death is exposure to your full potential. This transitional energy is a gift placed on the altar of life, now, giving offerings of energy and awareness. If you are looking for the greater meaning of your life, look to your death, for that is where you will find it.

Today, My Dear Ones, you may be struck by the sudden impact of death upon your reality in that world, upon that earth, but offer your selves the far greater impact being offered as death knocks on the windows and doors of your earthly form in some manner each day and asks to be let in. It is not offering demise, but it is offering you access to your true energy without having to leave that world.

This is what your awareness training is asking you to acknowledge and accept: that death means gaining full access to your energy, full access to awareness of the interconnectedness of all things, full access to universal knowledge, full access to God-light, God-love, and the ultimate awareness of self as part of this light and love, only fulfilled in energy awareness.

Contemplate your own moment of death. Though it remains far distant, so is it truly evolutionary to prepare for it each day, stealing a little of its energy for usage now. Why wait to gain access to that energy when you can have access to it so easily now, for your greater growth? Simply being aware of death as energy potential sets the intent to remain aware. This is what I ask of you, My Dear Traveling Companions: remain aware of your energy as your spirit continually awakens to its true potential. Do not be afraid to ask for it now, not death but the energy of it. Learn to trust what it shows you as your awareness grows. Allow it to guide you further in your life, remaining open to whatever may lie ahead. Be open to receiving not only energy, but the insights offered. Pay attention to the attachments you are being challenged to relinquish, turning always toward the light. Do not lose sight of the light.

Even in the darkest of times the light shines brightly, beckoning you to notice it shining through the veils, warming you with the energy of true love and compassion. Remain aware.

Questions for Jeanne, Reader Responses to Jeanne

A Response to Message #523

Hi Jan/Jeanne:

Thank you both for the energy you put forth to communicate with me. (Message #523) I also found today’s message about death particularly meaningful to me. I am realizing that I cannot know everything before I experience it and that, yes, it would be very limiting (and quite a feat!) if I could. A framework can be grounding but also limiting. It is good to know I haven’t missed anything and that I don’t need to rush.

I am also glad to be reminded that mental knowledge isn’t so important. I need to be ready to accept what I experience in order for it to mean anything. I think what you are saying is that I am energy, I contain all knowledge, and my awakening will happen when I am ready to experience this? No external description will help me grow because my experience will be utterly unique. I guess I get caught up in the idea of knowing things in this life so as to enable future evolution. However, you didn’t fully know you were energy and that you contained all knowledge while you were Jeanne Marie Ketchel, did you? You awoke through the death process and then your awakening continued and you were completed after you left your human form.

I have been working with Chuck for several months and I mentioned to him that I felt you were putting a lot of pressure on us to evolve and that you had very specific ideas about how we should go about this. He disagreed with my perception of your intent and is helping me to see that it is my own pressure. My spirit wants to catapult me, but my ego needs to slow down. I don’t know how to bring the two to an agreement.

I was exposed to many ideas and experiences as a child and they traumatized me, so I rejected my spiritual self until recently. I needed to ground myself and undo the damage that was done to me by these early experiences. If I hadn’t grounded myself, I would have felt lost while suspended in nothingness. Now I need to integrate these experiences and face my fear of nothingness, and my adult self needs to manage my spirit during this process. If one’s spirit is cultivated before one’s ego has a chance to solidify then that can be very terrifying. Does this make sense? I just don’t want to go back to sleep but, at the same time, I do, as you say, need to temper my pursuit of all things…

Imagining a life without limitations and endless possibility makes sense to me but, at the same time, I am struggling with concrete problems (as we all are) and I need to stay grounded and focused in this life. I don’t understand how I can truly live in my energy body when I am in my human form. Do you mean that I must cultivate out of body experiences, or am I being too concrete and dualistic?

It is comforting to know that my own energy is unique to me. I guess it’s uniqueness remains, regardless of what form it takes. I may reincarnate or I may live as pure energy and I may no longer have my (or at least not only) my identity; but me, as energy, is still unique.

I like that life is unending and I accept evolution AS purpose. I think that in this life I am meant to learn to trust myself, to be in my body, to balance freedom and responsibility, and to heal myself and others. I accept too that death is evolutionary as well and that I will have choices to make then too. I can accept that there exists a reality that I don’t know yet and that the reality I do know is always changing and is not fully real. It is fully real and should be experienced, but that is only one aspect or facet. I can let go and detatch and what is helpful, as I struggle to do this, is the notion that if I choose to take that plunge when I die and keep my awareness and evolve, I do not have to throw away all of the Me’s I have been — I can integrate them into one, and the common thread has always been, and will always be, my unique energy.

I think I am at once afraid of merging with another and of being abandoned. It is helfpul to think that whether I am merged or alone, I am still unique energy that cannot be destroyed, and so I am fluid and there is nothing to fear…of course, but right now I am still afraid, but I can come back to this knowledge and sit in the stillness of this truth when I need to recharge for the journey…I will remind myself too that terror arises from the jolt of new reality becoming available–I would love to hear any reactions to this that may come…I apologize for how convoluted and disjointed this may read…

Best,
Anonymous