I woke up this morning and turned to Jan: “I just had a nightmare!”
“So did I,” said she.
I was struck by the classification nightmare, not one I really identify with. However, it was the word that came out of my mouth.
As we compared notes, I realized we were in the same dream, though with different props. For Jan, it was the phantasmagorical winged serpent devouring the innocent or foolish. For me, it was the world of people and the devouring power of greed.
In my early waking moments I was being seduced by the mind to attach to intrigues in the world. I watched it happen, but didn’t attach; I held onto my energy. The phantasmagoric imagery of Jan’s dream tempered my interpretation of my own dream. We were being shown an energetic challenge before us and offered the opportunity either to grasp the metaphor and face the challenge within or allow it to project outward onto the world of everyday life.
Jung’s axiom came to the fore: face the shadow within or encounter it without. How quickly, when we attach to the without, is our energy completely engaged and drained. Can we strip away the nightmarish energy, see the challenge directly, and address the needed change? Or must we engage a new drama in an old world?
INTENTO!!!
As we talked about our dreams and came to understand the message, I found myself recapitulating walking out of a Tensegrity workshop that Jeanne and I had attended in 1999 having completed the magical pass of the Sabretooth Tiger of Intent. I provide a link to that pass here. I encourage those who view it to notice the transition back into the human form at the end of the pass. This is how to change: turn around 180 degrees and walk calmly away in a new direction, into a new life.
As Jan and I continued to talk this morning, it suddenly dawned on me that I hadn’t written my blog! In fact, I hadn’t even thought about what day it was or what I might write about! It became quite evident that the spirit had its own intent that this be my blog message today. And so, I have delivered it!
Carlos Castaneda writes, in The Wheel of Time: “We hardly ever realize that we can cut anything out of our lives, anytime, in the blink of an eye.”
Chuck’s Blog Chuck’s Place will be posted later in the day at the insistence of the tiger of intent, a Magical Pass that teaches us how to walk into new life like a shaman!
I’ve been doing inner child work for years. I’ve learned so much from long encounters, from hours of what Jung termed active imagination, from weeks of inner focus, as I’ve attended to my spirit. I sometimes feel that it’s like driving a car; sometimes I’m aware that I’m doing it, alert and conscious of everything I pass along the way, at other times I arrive at my destination wondering just how I got there.
I do inner child work especially when confronted with a dilemma or when conflicts arise. I know that it’s imperative that I constantly check in with my inner child and see how she’s doing. Although my personal challenges are, for the most part, clearly defined now, I also know that sometimes they are not the issues that need attention but that something else is calling to me, some deeper more profound need is making itself known.
Self-reflection?
I have a dilemma. How do I solve it? I ask for guidance. I wait for an answer. Meanwhile I have my own agenda. For the time being my personal agenda rules. It takes over. It’s all I can think about: how to set it in motion, how to contrive to make it happen, how to make it meaningful. I can’t get away from it. As I allow it to assert itself, it begins to dominate not only my thinking but my actions as well. This feels like part of the process I must go through, but deep inside I feel restless. Something else is stirring in me, raising a protest, asking me if this is really what I intend to do. I push it away.
“No,” I say, “I want it to happen my way. I want to be in control. I want to set up my life in such a manner that I can determine not only the process but the outcome as well.”
“Sorry,” I hear. “You are not going to be granted that wish today. Today you are going to have to struggle and eventually you are going to have to let go.”
“No, I don’t want to. I want things to work out my way!”
As this tug-of-war goes on, I know, deep inside, that I must stop playing this game. From experience, I know that the sooner I acquiesce to a process that is already in progress, already laid out for me, the better things will unfold. This is how I resolve my dilemma: I acquiesce to the process, but it takes deep work to get to this place of acquiescence.
I know I must dissect my personal agenda and discover why I am so attached to it. I must face the fact that I may be trying to hold onto old ideas, old agendas, and old comforts that no longer serve me. I must face that even though I may want those things, they are not good for me; they no longer serve who I am becoming, who I have the potential to become, and whom I need to become to evolve.
Once I’ve studied my personal agenda, the next step is to turn inward. I must get quiet in order to do this. I must let myself have a few moments of meditation or simply sit quietly and comfortably. I must ask myself: What is really going on here? What am I missing? Am I just reluctant, avoidant, affronted? Am I being shown something I must embrace; or the opposite, that this is something I must refuse?
Sitting in calmness allows the voice of our inner child to be heard. If we listen carefully we will hear truths spoken that we may not have wanted to hear before, that we may not have been ready to hear until now. If we allow ourselves to become a frightened child again, knowing that we are facing changes that we don’t want to happen while we also remain our adult selves, we may reach a new level of understanding about how we tend to function on a normal basis.
We all have a needy, wounded child inside us. No matter how much inner work we do that child will always be present, suggesting deeper issues that need attention. Its needs are endless, ancient needs. Eventually we learn that they stretch far back, into eons, into past lives full of similar needs left unresolved.
Ready to get off the well worn path and enter the abyss?
As we do inner child work, our spirit will repeatedly guide us in how to sit alongside our child self, perhaps in discomfort at first, but later in full acceptance as we face the ancient knowing child self and ask it to tell us what comes next. What must I face this time? Where are you taking me?
We must be prepared to face our fears. We must accept that our inner child self of this lifetime is frightened of change. We must accept that our adult self of this lifetime is afraid of change too. Both parts of us must constantly face the truth that change is challenging us to face our fears and conquer them with awareness.
Whenever I sit in calmness with my adult self and my frightened child self, I know that there is something else beneath the fears that I must also face. I must go even deeper. I must reach down to that far more evolved ancient child self, the one who has already lived these life challenges before. This is the knowing self that constantly challenges me to go beyond my present self. This is the place where I will gain clarity on what to do to resolve my dilemma.
Clarity often comes in calmness, delivering a direct blow. Much like getting hit over the head, it strikes quickly and with utter clarity. When we are ready we are able to accept it and immediately act upon it. If we are not ready it will remain churning inside us until we are ready.
When our world is challenging us, even collapsing on us, our deepest dilemma is often in learning how to acquiesce, to let go, to not fight as we have been taught, but to let the process guide us. Often we may find the deeper meaning inside, rather than in constantly looking for reason and answer outside. Sometimes we just can’t have things our way.
There is so much more to doing inner child work. As we work with what our inner child presents, going deeper and deeper, we get to know just who that child is, and just who we are and why. Eventually, we all arrive at that place where the ancient child self speaks. Often the sound of that ancient child’s voice may be distant and difficult to decipher, but if we let our personal agenda go, for even a second, we may be able to accept the truth it brings us. Sometimes just a hint of something different, a deep inner knowing, may waft up and offer us just enough to help us along, to make a decision that will indeed set us on a new path.
What lies in the vastness of the inner world?
The inner world is vast, bigger than the outer world. Jung once noted that once we do inner work we will no longer be able to ready novels, because nothing can compare to what we have already encountered inside the vastness of the self. I have found this to be true. I personally can no longer read a novel. I am quickly bored, knowing that inside the self reside all the mysteries and horror stories that I once enjoyed reading, the adventures and relationships I loved to tap into, other people’s lives I’d turn to. All of those things, and more, reside inside us, in the vastness of our inner world, just waiting to be tapped into.
As we let ourselves be guided through the terrors inside us, we arrive at precipice after precipice. And each time we stand on the brink of change we know that we must take the leap into the abyss that yawns before us, if we are to keep evolving. That is where our riches lie, where our thrills await us, where our adversaries lurk, where our beauties hide, and where our spirits will greet us.
Going ever more deeply inward, we soon discover that our outer world is less threatening, less frightening, less terrifying, for we discover that it cannot present us with anything as frightening as we have already faced within. This is what Jung learned and this is what we also may learn as we continue our inner child work.
Thank you for reading, and may you all enjoy the adventure of a lifetime, inside the self.
Dear Jeanne and all of infinity that guides and shows us the way: What message do you offer us today?
Here is the reply from Jeanne and the Universe:
Like the shadows on the wall, change is a constant.
All of you who struggle—as most people do with some problem or issue at one time or another—do not despair nor turn your back on the process before you. Change is inevitable.
I encourage all of you to keep in mind that life does not stop because you declare it too much to handle. No, life will keep at you until you either break or shut down to its urgings. But know that either way, life will continue, for it is a constant.
Your pains will ease as you confront them, but they will remain active in one way or another if you refuse them. If you answer the call of your spirit, you will be rewarded with never-ending new discoveries about the self and the life you live. If you constantly refuse to participate in what life itself has handed you, with interest in evolving, your energy will be usurped by your refusal.
I must state once again: Life is all about change. It is about accepting the inevitable truth that change happens. It is about learning to regard change as your most valuable life companion. It is about letting change outside of you change you on the inside. It is about using the changes in your circumstance to guide you and show you your deepest issues, truths, and needs. It is about accepting change as necessary for personal growth.
Change asks you to question it for its personal meaning. And remember this: Everything is meaningful.
What has changed for you lately?
Can you stay in that place of change and then move the next step, going more deeply into it?
Can you accept that you have no control and then allow your reluctant self to let go a little bit more?
Can you begin to embrace the inevitability that change is upon you, has you firmly in its grip, is holding you tightly already?
Can you dare to allow yourself to be taken into new life?
This is where you are now: on the road to new life. In reality that means that, yes, everything is going to change even more. It’s frightening, but it’s also invigorating you with a new kind of energy. You may never have experienced this kind of energy before and so it may seem overwhelming, but if you can allow its intensity to carry you forward you will be mighty surprised.
I suggest to you all: Let go into new life. One step at a time let yourself be guided by life itself. It is ready to meet you at a new level of awareness and involvement.
It’s up to you. You must each ask the question: Do I fight or do I go? Either way, things are already changing.
Good Luck! And welcome to the energy of now that does not wish to stop. Its path of destruction leads to new life, to better life, to evolving life for each one of you, and the world at large.
Acquiesce and go far now, My Dears. Find your path and stick to it. Listen to your heart and let your head rest awhile, until you have found your footing. Even in going forward blindly you are led in the right direction; and sometimes it’s better that way.
And remember, whatever path you take will be the right one. You will learn and grow from your choices and the experiences you encounter. Know always the truths I have long been speaking of: Change has already happened; change invites you forward; change is your new life companion.
We are challenged every day by forces that want our time, money, attention, and emotion. Jung focused on the inner culprit—the shadow, or unknown self—as the force that consumes a great deal of our daily energy and actions. The shamans of Carlos Castaneda’s lineage focused outwardly on the flyer, an entity that preys upon the tumult of human excess for its own sustenance and survival.
These are two descriptions of reality that coin metaphors to capture the predatory dimension of life. If we can acknowledge, that is, suspend judgment about this dimension of life, both within the self and in the world at large, we are freed to benefit from this relationship. The function of the shadow/flyer is to show us all of who we are. With this knowledge we can choose who we might become.
As we exit the season of excessive consumption we are shown our proclivity for sensual delight, whether we indulge or refuse it. Encounters with shadow/flyer may result in nausea, guilt, depression, insatiability, out-of-controlledness, and defeat.
Make no mistake about it; these are powerful entities with completely self-serving agendas. They can wreak havoc on our physical and emotional selves. However, their power lies solely in our ignorance or refusal to know the full truth about ourselves. If we can accept that we are sensual, emotional beings that need to find fulfillment in all that we are, we can begin to make room for all that we potentially are, in new balance.
Sometimes, we engage in excess to numb ourselves from parts of the self too painful or frightening to know. This is a defensive strategy that has its temporary value, however, it cannot hold back the deepest need to know and realize the full self. This activity points the way to recapitulation.
When we find ourselves caught in the daily round of repetitive Jekyll/Hyde behavior—fully convicted and repentant with the rising sun, only to be swept away again and again with the rising moon—we are awakened to the power of the shadow/flyer to control our lives in the absence of self-knowledge. As we awaken, we are freed to find new balance in our lives, perhaps a middle way; and with this awareness we are able to release the predatory entity of excess.
Mosquitoes are predatory flyers. However, they will move on to other prey when the stagnant pool that breeds them dries up. If we remain in stagnancy, we invite the shadow/flyer into our lives. It will feast upon us in our stagnancy, however, with the discomfort it creates we are invited to change.
Such is the nature of this symbiotic relationship between predator and prey. The predator becomes the beacon or instigator of change. Nonetheless, we must use this provocation to our advantage. That is, we must wake up, face the fullness of the self and move toward balance and fulfillment in life. Once we begin this process of change we release the predator because it no longer serves us. And we no longer serve it!
Moving on, into a new space. We have literally moved our office to the end of the hall, beyond our former location. See you there!
Chuck
