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Chuck’s Place: Meet The Body Where It Is At!

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Startled awake, I am taut and tense, my mind spinning it's tales… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Startled awake, I am taut and tense, my mind spinning it’s tales…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

I awaken with a start from an action-packed thriller dream. As the storyline reassembles to waking consciousness, I survey the state of my body. My jaw and throat are tightly clenched. The muscles of my legs and arms are tight as well. My pelvis, abdomen, stomach and chest are all frozen. In my stilled state I breathe slowly, lightly, and intermittently from my upper chest. My body lies in utter stillness. My emotions are sadness and fear. My overall body sensation is one of pensive anxiety.

I begin to review the dream, what it means in this dimension of waking life. What are the parallels, the synchronistic implications for life in this day? My mind begins to tell me a story to fit the theme of the dream, to account for the vigilant state I experience in my body. My mind concludes that indeed, bad news must be on the near horizon; I must remain on alert, brace myself.

I remind myself of the many stories my mind has generated in the past to account for similar physical states of heightened alertness. I remind myself how rarely those stories have turned out to be true. I remind myself that the storyteller mind is quite creative, however, its genre is essentially fiction, not to be trusted to guide the daily ship.

These reminders, I notice, have little impact on releasing my body from the vice grip it finds itself in. I appreciate the mind’s attempt to help the body release through these reflective reminders, but I also realize that my body needs a different approach.

I direct my consciousness away from the storytelling center of the mind and enter into the state of my abdomen. I notice the tension of its grip. Slowly, I direct my breath into my abdomen, allowing it to expand like a balloon. With that, I notice the tightness in my pelvis and stomach gladly asking to follow the lead of my abdomen. They all release and my abdominal energy flows in harmony once again. I notice my breath beginning to fill my chest cavity, the muscles around my ribcage relaxing, allowing for deeper expansion as my heart opens as well.

I shift my focus to my still-clenched throat and jaw, releasing the tightness of my jaw, directing air slowly into the channel of my throat, allowing it to expand slightly more with each breath. I notice my fingers and toes spontaneously uncurling. I feel warm blood flowing throughout my body. I notice my mind is quieter, as it listens to my body, how it questions whether there is, in fact, danger at all. That thought sends a spark of alertness through my body. I quickly shift my awareness back to my body and take in a full breath, allowing all parts to release as I exhale. I’m good to go now.

My mind and body at ease, flowing once again… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
My mind and body at ease,
flowing once again…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

I realize that had I not gone and met my body where it was at, I would have held its tension, however, subliminally, throughout the day. It’s message to the mind would have generated an ongoing epic story, reinforcing its conclusion that I must remain on alert. That would have been the dominant experience of the day. Without awareness brought to the body, to release it from its reaction to the world of the dream, I would not have been freed to be fully present to life during the daytime.

It’s not enough to tell ourselves to relax. We must go to the body and meet it where it’s at. We must free it to accompany us through the day, so that it may correctly perceive and communicate its reactions to the here and now, offering a true gauge of the reality of the moment. I know, from years of study and observation, as well as personal experience, that like the animals who sense and communicate the momentarily arriving danger of an earthquake or oncoming storm, that the body will tell me when there is real danger. We can trust it, but must first go to meet it where it may be stuck and preoccupied with old reactions to old stories, which must be cleared if we are to be fully present and aware.

As my dream and subsequent experience reveals, we must go and meet the body where it is at, listen to its findings, and help it release old reactions if we are to fully benefit from its ability to assess and react to real and present danger. To merely shout commands from above, telling it to relax, will not suffice. We must go inward and tenderly treat ourselves to a natural release. Once we have accomplished that, all can proceed from there!

Chuck

Chuck's Blog

Chuck’s Place: You’re Never Stuck!

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At the center of all of us lies the jewel… It's even in those we dislike the most… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
At the center of all of us lies the jewel…
It’s even in those we dislike the most…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

We use projection as a defense when we find ourselves disliking or hating another person. We see in that other person qualities or behaviors that we find threatening or distasteful in some way. In disliking the other person, we keep such disturbing energies at a distance from ourselves, even if we must interact with that person on a daily basis.

The negative emotional state of disliking or hating another, though often unconsciously, protectively established, creates an inner toxic state of cynicism, depression, and powerlessness, leading to an equally toxic obsession with the disliked person.

We also encounter powerlessness in being unable to make the other person change in a way that would make us feel relief and comfort. In our powerlessness we also feel that our own deepest needs are not being met. If, for example, I experience someone close to me as being completely self-absorbed and unable to be present for me in the way I desire, I will likely feel angry, unloved, rejected, and unvalidated, as if I exist only to serve the other, with no consideration of my own right to be in this world.

In this scenario, I am powerless to find peace and happiness within my own being, as this rejecting person can’t even see me. I blame the other person for my unhappiness. I might feel stuck in this relationship that I see no escape from, or I might dream about a new life, freed of the prison I find myself in.

In order to turn such a scenario on it’s ear, in order to shift out of a place of blame and rejection, we must search for redemption within this situation and within ourselves. But how can I possibly find freedom now, you might ask, in the midst of what I consider a lifetime sentence? How can I save myself from the darkest of dungeons, from which I see no viable escape? Can I assume full responsibility for being in the situation I’m in, acknowledge that it is completely tailored for my growth? And at some deep level, can I accept that I’m in it to solve it? Can I face it without blame? Can I accept that the pain is part of my gain; it just is?

To begin with, we might look upon our perceived jailer, the rejecting other, as a being equally captivated within their own story, their own prison. Can we step back and appreciate the depth of the other’s drama and pain, how it limits them too from being fully present to live their own life to the fullest? Can we grant them the freedom to solve and resolve their own mysteries, to find their own way to salvation, to allow them the freedom to work on becoming a new person, capable of being present in the moment? Can we see that we can actually choose whether to be offended or whether to release ourselves from an expectation that doesn’t match up with current possibility? Can we accept the reality of where things are, without blame or regret?

Can we turn inward and validate ourselves, our own right to exist? Can we become the mother and father to our own evolving self? If, by the circumstances of our birth, we’ve been caught in an unloving world, can we become the lover of our own possibility? Can we fully assume responsibility for our birthright to evolve from wherever we began, taking control of our right to take life forward in a new direction? Can we validate our right to existence and open ourselves to possibility? Can we support and guide ourselves through the change we so desperately desire and seek? Can we allow ourselves to flourish?

Can we allow ourselves to take back our projections, becoming the change that we wish for, opening the door to the true magical mystery tour of life in this world?

Be the change you wish for!

On the tour,
Chuck

Chuck's Blog

Chuck’s Place: Shamanic Tools Of Freedom

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Freedom is the unmasking of the petty tyrant and seeing it for what it really is… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Freedom is the unmasking of the petty tyrant and seeing it for what it really is…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

As a seeker and a therapist, I search for tools of freedom. Freedom is the ability to flow with life as it is. Life is flux—change—and with change always comes a wounding to that which once was. Woundings create fixations, protective shells of holding on, to that which was. Such fixations interrupt our ability to flow with life as it has become.

The shaman’s world accepts the inevitability of woundings and tracks the human tendency to fixate on judgment of the self for its woundings. These judgments take the form of self-blame or self-rage. Either judgment further infects the wound and alienates the self from the flow of life energy. The shamans are empathic to woundings but ruthless in their goal of freedom. Hence, they go to extraordinary lengths to uncouple from attachment to their woundings.

To break the fixation with wounds to self-worth, self-importance, or self-esteem, the Shamans of Ancient Mexico encouraged their apprentices to saturate themselves with the doings of tyrants who made their lives miserable. In order to free themselves from the effects of these tyrants, these shaman initiates needed to astutely study the tactics and behaviors of these petty tyrants to precisely plan and execute their defeat. If they allowed themselves to indulge in blame, shame, rage, pity, or self-defeat, they would lose focus, often to fatal outcome. Those shaman initiates learned to waste no energy on taking anything personally, but focused instead on staying present in objective reality. This was the path of freedom from their woundings.

Traumatic encounters are uninvited encounters with life’s harshest petty tyrants. Shaman initiates seek out the encounter with the tyrant, but innocent recipients aren’t given that choice. Whereas the shaman initiate is in an active playing field with the tyrant, in real time, the trauma recipient’s playing field is the field of recapitulation, the reliving of the trauma once lived.

The means of achieving freedom from traumatic fixation, however, is identical to the means of achieving freedom from all woundings. To complete the process, we must arrive at what the shamans call the “place of no pity,” for self and other. From this position, there is total clarity and total release, as the ability to be present for the full truth of what happened, and the full release of energies previously fixated by life interrupted, is achieved. This is the ultimate defeat of the tyrant: complete release from its grip and complete release from the protective shell of fixation. From this place of no pity we retrieve the journeying self. We shift and reengage in life, as it is. Freedom achieved!

Chuck

Chuck's Blog

Chuck’s Place: An Opening

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Our ancient reactions are like old walls of defense, but they can be taken down… one breath at a time… -Photo by Jan Ketchel
Our ancient reactions are like old walls of defense,
but they can be taken down…
one breath at a time…
-Photo by Jan Ketchel

When we are met with a smile, a nod, or a gentle welcoming gesture, we are programmed to soften, feel safe, relax our defenses and breathe freely. This innate archetypal bodily response to accepting supportive validating gestures may be inhibited by a history of traumatic interruptions that threatened safety; however, these bruises in human interactions can heal and, over time, allow us to relax into our innate capacity for love. We never lose our innate capacity to give and receive love.

The journey to freeing our innate capacity to receive the world, and express our full presence in it, is multilayered but largely physical. The bruises of trauma generate archetypal bodily defenses far more ancient than the archetypes of human interaction.

Failures in human interaction trigger an intrinsic self-driven defense system that functions independently of the behavior of others. If others cannot be trusted then the self alone becomes the source of safety.

The body turns on its own vigilant guard to protect the boundaries of the self. Sleep may be light or infrequent as a result of such vigilance. Muscles remain taut, shoulders tight, breathing shallow. All bodily systems, in fact, stay on heightened alert to possible danger, cautiously anticipating, planning, and avoiding potential trouble. This completely self-reliant defense system is ancient and highly useful in times of real danger. In our evolutionary history there was a time when it alone insured survival. Though less necessary in the modern world, it can be activated in a heartbeat should we be confronted with serious danger.

A major challenge in healing from trauma is turning off this ancient defense system when it has been activated unnecessarily. Here the human ability to reflect and choose a new action is particularly useful.

We can employ the mind, with its ability to observe and reason, to assess whether we are indeed really, in the here and now, in danger. The realization that we are not in danger in no way lessens the grip of this ancient defense that protects us through its control of our body, but it does give us a point of awareness, within our body, that alerts us to where the true work lies.

Reason alone has little to no impact upon the body’s defenses. We can, however, intentionally direct our awareness to our body and notice the state of our muscles and organs—heart, stomach, throat, etc.—as well as our breathing. We can, with awareness and intention, begin to direct our breath to various parts of our body that we notice to be clenched or shut down. We can, for instance, progressively soften and loosen our solar plexus or heart as we gently direct our breath into it. Similarly, we can begin to release tension in our shoulders and legs, or wherever we find tension in the body, by intending ourselves to do so. The body quite obediently listens and responds to our intentions.

As we consciously release the grip of vigilance in our body, our brain receives different messages from our body self that lies separate, beneath the head of reason. If our muscles and organs are relaxed, our brain concludes that we must be safe. The brain is then freed to stop its own vigilant story making that had given definition to the worrisome messages that it had been receiving from a tense, defended body.

Every time we release the tension of a clenched part of our body we change the message to the brain and the brain, in turn, changes its message back to the body. Over time, the brain can send the message that it’s okay to relax; we are safe. With safety comes receptivity, and our inherent archetypal ability to engage in deeper human connection opens. Smiles, nods, and warmth are able to be more safely received and expressed. We open.

This process of opening is indeed multifaceted and includes the journey of recapitulation, but it can be supported and enhanced, at any time—even in this moment—with one gentle directed breath.

Breathing away,
Chuck

Chuck's Blog

Chuck’s Place: Reconciliation Of Retrograde

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Trickster energy… - Photo by Chuck Ketchel
Trickster energy…
– Photo by Chuck Ketchel

It’s 6:21 AM. I’m driving slowly along the windy hilly roads to work. My mind is preoccupied with the experience Jan and I had last Friday at the VA Hospital in Albany. We’d been invited to present on PTSD. We decided to give an experiential presentation for which I’d brought my EMDR light bar. There was a delay getting into the conference room, as a prior meeting was spilling over into our time. Our presentation time was compromised, as another presenter was to follow immediately after us.

Once we finally entered the room, I quickly attempted to set up the equipment. Suddenly we entered a cartoon-like dream. Everything we touched, although meticulously packed, fell apart. The tripod literally fell into pieces, impossible to reassemble.

“Okay,” I resolve, “I’ll hold the light bar without the stand.” As I go to clip the control switch into the bar I discover that the clip is broken. There is no salvaging the equipment now! That’s it, I decide, the trickster shaman’s world trumps. The Magical Breathing Pass of Recapitulation will have to be the main experiential feature. And so, about 25 people learned and experienced this ancient Magical Pass and it’s application to PTSD.

As I continue to drive to work, I recall that the time crunch of the presentation also precluded a brief group hypnosis that Jan was to give at the close of the talk. Suddenly, my awareness is abruptly drawn back to the present moment: a young deer is staring at me, frozen in the road. I slam on the brakes—a near miss!

The symbol for Mercury...
The symbol for Mercury…

What does it all mean? For the past several days, I’ve been experiencing and observing opposition and retrograde. We exist and are composed of fields of competing energies. Mercury, the trickster energy, is indeed in retrograde. At the VA we experienced the ancient shamanic energy opposing and trumping the modern mechanical/technological world. At the moment I recalled the opposition of time and trance—no time for a group hypnosis—I was awoken from my own highway hypnosis to not kill a deer. Here was the opposition of time and timelessness: being present in this moment to not kill a deer vs being lost in the timeless world of the mind’s meanderings.

We all struggle with oppositions within the self. Carlos Castaneda relates in Magical Passes how don Juan Matus explained this in a metaphorical sense: “…that we are composed of a number of single nations: the nation of the lungs, the nation of the heart, the nation of the kidneys, and so on. Each of these nations sometimes works independently of the others, but at the moment of death, all of them are unified into one single entity.” (pp. 103-4)

Our challenge in this life is to reconcile those oppositions within us, the trickster included, into an integrated whole, in a process that Jung termed individuation.

Sometimes the nation of the stomach craves that which the other nations of the body reject. Sometimes the neocortex—our rational brain—rejects the impulses and needs of our limbic system—our animal brain.

When my neocortex confronted the frozen limbic response of the deer in my headlights, it managed to direct my body to hit the brakes. My own limbic system worked in concert with my neocortex to supply the rapid response to react physically to the crises at hand. This is an optimal response—nations of the self unified, acting in concert.

In times of retrograde, Mercury, the trickster, can confound all attempts at collaboration. Mercury laughed as I fumbled with the equipment at the VA. Rather than fight, I read the signs and immediately shifted. Acquiescing, I flowed with the energy of the moment and instead taught deep bodily knowledge.

Opposition is within us all...
Opposition is within us all…

When I asked the I Ching for guidance regarding this period of retrograde, it once again, not surprisingly, produced the hexagram of Opposition, #38. The moving lines—in the third and fourth places—depicted a wagon with oxen being dragged backwards. Now there’s a retrograde image! The guidance reads: though humiliation might occur, sit tight, wait, align with a likeminded person who can be trusted. In the case of the faulty light bar, I turned to my neocortex, which acted in concert with spirit: Go with the flow, trust the Magical Pass.

In shaman’s terms, the guidance is to suspend judgment, to look beyond the impasse. Reconciliation lies in the deeper meaning of the trickster’s intent—to reveal a deeper truth: The ancient Magical Pass of Recapitulation is all you need to be freed of PTSD.

We can reconcile with all our retrograde energies if we accept their opposition with patience and perseverance, not falling for the trap of self-blame. The deeper meaning of Mercury’s retrograde lies in the wings of Mercury—our freedom to fly—achievable if we don’t get caught in the heaviness of opposition.

Flowing on the wings of Mercury,
Chuck