A Day in a Life: Shedding Ancestral Baggage

Seeking the road to wholeness and freedom... - Photo by Chuck Ketchel
Seeking the road to wholeness and freedom…
– Photo by Chuck Ketchel

We are born with ancestral baggage. We are attached to and burdened by the energy of our ancestors, our families of origin, and our life’s circumstances. We pass this burdensome energy onto our children and all who come into contact with us. We will suffer until we free ourselves. Others too will suffer until we free ourselves.

When spirit calls, it is asking us to free ourselves of our emotional baggage, our physical attachments, our mental constraints, and our spiritual limitations. It asks us to methodically unburden ourselves, to face the truths of our lives with utter honesty and humility. It asks us to question who we truly are, why we think the way we do, and if our thoughts really reflect the deepest truths of who we are. In 2001 I finally paid attention to that call from my spirit. I met Chuck and began the process of reclaiming my true self, the person I always knew I really was but was so afraid to be. I kept this person hidden.

As an artist I found a means for her to live, as I discovered I could covertly reveal her personality, her innocence and her darkness alike. In expressing myself as an artist anything was acceptable. Over the years I knew there was a lot more, a deeper level that even my artist self was not willing to enter. In the caverns of my soul lay the untouchable self. Alongside her lay the wretched remnants of that which could not be spoken.

Although this self was unknown to me, she flashed up every now and then, freaking me out, sending me deeper into the river of depression that flowed through my life. Eventually, I knew I would need to address her, or at least the feelings that I could not handle and the crumbling of the world I was trying to uphold. That was the beginning of my recapitulation process.

When I first met Chuck, he and Jeanne were deeply immersed in the shaman’s world, specifically that of Carlos Castaneda and the practice of Tensegrity, going to workshops around the world on a regular basis. When Chuck learned the recapitulation sweeping breath he noticed that it’s bilateral movement was similar to the bilateral aspects of EMDR, a trauma treatment process that he’d been studying. Quick intuitive that he is, he immediately saw the clinical potential of recapitulation. His hunch was to prove true.

I have just published the third volume in the Recapitulation Diaries series, Into the Vast Nothingness. This is the continuation of the recapitulation journey that I unknowingly embarked on when I met Chuck on that fateful day in 2001. I say “unknowingly” because I didn’t know that it was what I was going to be doing. As we worked together the process unfolded, the journey took us, though Chuck was deeply aware of it, always patiently waiting for me to find my way. Eventually, the word “recapitulation” became synonymous with the work I was doing; there was no other word to describe it.

I reveal just about everything about myself in my books. I see no value in holding back because I know there is someone else out there with similar baggage who might be helped. I offer my books as incentives to unburdening, even if only privately and in the safety of one’s own inner world.

The shamanic practice of recapitulation, however, comes with its own powerful energy. It has a habit of infiltrating into life. It asks us in a myriad of ways, just like spirit, to examine ourselves minutely. It asks us to face our deepest selves, presenting us with new ways of seeing, asking us to deal with what we no longer need in our lives. As we shed the old baggage, we discover that there isn’t really that much of our old world or our old self that need accompany us forward.

Just as I reveal my deepest self in my books, I don’t hold back about the difficulties of the journey either. Recapitulation is a difficult road, a solitary and lonely journey, but it’s a thorough means of achieving the great unburdening that our spirit asks of us. It’s a choice that we make or refuse, but it’s really only a choice if we know exactly what it is that we are choosing or refusing. Do we take the journey to freedom and wholeness or do we continue to carry the baggage of our lives, ancestral and otherwise? As Chuck always told me: When you are ready the journey will meet you and if you are not ready then wait, it will catch up with you soon enough!

At one point during my recapitulation, I realized I was carrying more than just my own depression. I was carrying the depression of generations of women in my family, that ancestral baggage! I no longer wanted to be the bearer of it. It did not belong to me! And furthermore, I did not want my children burdened by that which did not belong to them either, but I knew I could only free them by freeing myself. In freeing myself, I am able to free them to face life on their own terms, free to be who they are truly meant to be. They do not need to uphold the ancestral world, at least not because of me.

There are many tools to spiritual awareness. Recapitulation is a deep and lasting tool to unburdening the self, not only of that ancestral baggage that we all carry, but everything else that holds our spirit back from truly living.

Cover of Volume 3 of The Recapitulation Diaries
Cover of Volume 3 of The Recapitulation Diaries

I send another book out into the world. In publishing Into the Vast Nothingness, I free myself of attachment to it, even as I hope that others will find it and read it, because I wish for others to be free too. I hope you will read the books and learn that everything can be spoken about, everything can be talked about in the right, safe setting, and everything can be let go of.

Should you feel inclined, I invite you to write reviews of the books, as what you say may help others as they seek not only to heal from their traumas, but to heal from the ancestral traumas we all carry too. May your own journeys be journeys of freedom.

Blessings on your journey,

Here is a link to the new Book: Into the Vast Nothingness in our Store.

A Soulbyte For The Day

Cover of Volume 3 of The Recapitulation Diaries
Cover of Volume 3 of The Recapitulation Diaries

Today’s Soulbyte:

Reveal who you truly are.
Be met with true spirit in return.
This is how to live.

Jan reveals who she truly is in her books, the latest, Into the Vast Nothingness, just published.

Here is a link to the Kindle version where you can take a look inside and read the introduction: Into the Vast Nothingness-Kindle

Here is the paperback version: Into the Vast Nothingness-Paperback

Chuck’s Place: The Path Of Innocence

First light, innocence of a new day... - Photo by Jan Ketchel
First light, innocence of a new day…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

I am deeply appreciative of the pioneering work of others who have contributed to the clarity of my own unfolding path. As a result, I recently considered a major shift. The question that presented was whether or not to deepen my affiliation with the work of one of those pioneers, a major energetic commitment.

I’ve been at this kind of juncture many times in this life. I recall the moment when Jeanne and I looked into each other’s eyes after our first encounter with the witches of Carlos Castaneda’s lineage. In that moment we knew that this was it. Our lives energetically shifted forever as we aligned our intent with the intent of the Shamans of Ancient Mexico, the intent of total freedom.

As I pondered this current potential shift, I threw the I Ching and received the guidance of hexagram #10, Treading [Conduct] with a moving line in the second place. Treading portrays the weak going to meet the strong, the weak literally treading on the tail of the tiger. In this case, the weak is innocent, not meaning harm but in fact seeking connection. And with that the powerful tiger is accepting; it does not swallow up the weak.

To me the tiger, the powerful, is the unconscious in all its deepest transpersonal manifestations including spirit, in all its mystery. The weak is consciousness, innocent but limited in its knowledge of the vastness of self. All healing requires a fluid relationship between the weak and the strong. The I Ching is speaking directly to my question: How best to approach this great mystery of spirit? In the nine in the second place, it refines its answer, as follows:

The situation of a lonely sage is indicated here. He remains withdrawn from the bustle of life, seeks nothing, asks nothing of anyone, and is not dazzled by enticing goals. He is true to himself and travels through life unassailed, on a level road. Since he is content and does not challenge fate, he remains free of entanglements.

This answer resonates deeply with my heart, mirroring the path of heart that Jeanne and I embarked upon on that day with the witches of Castaneda’s lineage. It was my head that questioned a shift, but the I Ching answered to my heart! The I Ching produces a future reflection as well, based on this charged second line, the hexagram of Innocence, #25. Here, the point is further driven home:

When, in accord with this, movement follows the law of heaven, man is innocent and without guile. His mind is natural and true, unshadowed by reflection or ulterior designs. For wherever conscious purpose is to be seen, there the truth and innocence of nature have been lost. Nature that is not directed by the spirit is not true but degenerate nature.

To underscore: Movement that flows from the head and not the heart loses its innocent connection to spirit.

Energy of true nature... - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Energy of true nature…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Jan and I accept that we are lone wolves. We promote not; we seek not to affiliate. We attach no self-importance to our work. We strive to remain purely innocent journeyers, humbly offering our experiences that others may learn and grow. We open to the magnetic draw of spirit as it may choose to move through our works.

Jan’s latest book, Into the Vast Nothingness, published today, is another offering to those seeking the tools to take the deepest of soul retrieval journeys in this life. Our only intent is that her works may inspire and find their way to those seeking to unburden and truly align with their own path of innocence.

As for us, we remain lone wolves, navigating our own paths of innocence—quite happily, I might add!

Remaining on my path of heart,

We are very excited to announce the publication of Jan’s new book. We energetically send it on it’s way with the aforementioned intent. Here is the link: Into the Vast Nothingness. The Kindle edition is soon to be published. Updates to follow.

A Day in a Life: Time To Make The Shift

The golden moment has arrived! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
The golden moment has arrived!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

I don’t really know that much about astrology. I follow a few blogs, but I get lost in the planets, in the alignments and polarities. I find the details mind-boggling. It’s often like reading a foreign language. But even so, I know what I feel.

I woke up in the middle of the night. I was awake during the moment of the cardinal grand cross, a rare four planet pattern that occurred last night. As I lay awake, I knew it was time to make further inroads into the changes that I’ve been instituting over the past several years. “Now,” I thought to myself, “is the time to fully make the shift.”

Life challenges us all the time. Life asks us to make decisions, to face our difficulties, and to keep growing. I just have to look out the window and I know that facing my challenges is in alignment with nature, planetary or otherwise. Nature dies and then pushes through. The grass grows, the flowers bloom, the leaves appear once again.

I notice the signs that come to greet me, underscoring this time of shift. A butterfly flies over our heads as we sit in the yard, a little early we think. Two moths appear at the window, right in front of my eyes. I cannot fail to take in the significance; spirit is calling.

Spirit is always calling. As Chuck and I were discussing this morning, we are all born equipped with it. Then we lose it. We lose touch with our innocence, our connection to the wonder and the magic, but then we spend our lives looking for it. Sometimes we are doing this with purpose and at other times we do it unconsciously. But spirit calls out to us in so many ways, asking us to come back to our equipment again, that which we were born with, our connection to the energy of everything. In answering the call, we are declaring that we are ready, knowing full well that changing ourselves will take work. We put on our warrior self and we fight alongside our spirit self as we break through old worlds and old behaviors, old patterns that have kept us in bondage, so that we can achieve our own perfect grand cross.

When I began my recapitulation, it was really because my spirit was calling so loudly that I could not ignore it. Following that call meant the collapse of everything, but it also meant the beginning of new life. In shift, in change, there is death and rebirth, breaking apart and building up. Endings and beginnings are bundled up, tangled up in the process of change. Gradually the destruction turns to construction, as new structures based on spirit begin to take over and the new world that we’ve been working on for so long finally begins taking shape.

The feeling is that now is the time to implement that which has been taking shape, to not only notice the signs of spirit but act on them. We all have something inside of us, some goal, some desire, some creative urge, our spirit calling out to us in some way. My spirit once called out to me because it was dying, but now it is alive and well, living a full and productive life, but still it calls out to me: Time to go deeper still! And so I pay heed. “Yes,” I say, “time to go deeper still!”

It’s time for all of us to let spirit take us more fully into experiencing just what “deeper still” means. I’m game!

Change is good,