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A Day in a Life: Change? What Do You Mean?

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This view is different every day… So is all of life, if we care to see it that way… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
This view is different every day…
So is all of life, if we care to see it that way…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

What does it mean to be the change you want to see? When I was a child one of my favorite things to do was to hang upside down on the monkey bars or from the branch of a tree. Suddenly the world was different! The same thing happened inside when I’d hang my head off the side of my bed or the living room couch, my hair brushing the floor. Suddenly everything was different. Doorways had trestles to step over, furniture clung to the ceiling and my mother sitting nearby was capable of the most extraordinary feats. I’d watch her get up out of her chair and walk upside down! I’d imagine being a fly, able to walk up the walls and across the ceiling all the time.

I’d often climb high into the branches of my favorite tree and see the world from a different perspective, like a queen on her throne, ruler of all I surveyed. Sometimes someone would walk by on the path beneath the tree, unaware that I was above them, watching every move they made. During such times I experienced a unique and unusual sense of power, power that in my normal life simply did not exist.

It took me a long time to realize that I did in fact have the power to change how I perceived the world, my child self innocently showing me just how easy it really was. From a different perspective, the world was new and different and I was new and different as well. How could I not be when I’d suddenly find myself in such an extraordinary position, capable of changing the world as I saw it?

Most of my childhood was spent in deep depression. Not that I was aware of what depression was, as it’s only in hindsight that I know that it was a symptom of my life circumstances. As a result, I shut down, my inner fantasy world much more interesting that the everyday world I inhabited. The outer world paled and became dull in comparison. It became routine, boring, and uneventful. I never imagined it would be otherwise. The thing that changed all that was really getting fed up with that boring world, and with myself as well. I had to find out what else there was out there!

And so I got up and got going. I looked for signs to show me what to do. Signs appeared, which led to a series of changes as I dared myself to follow them. I moved, a lot. I married, divorced, and then married and divorced again. I filled my life with children and work, with keeping active and busy, with creative endeavors. I instigated change all the time—I became a person of action! But it wasn’t until I realized that with all the changes I was making, nothing had really changed at all, and I was still the same depressed person I had always been. Something was wrong with my approach.

It was then that I realized that all the changes I’d made had been related to the world outside of me. I was constantly changing my circumstances or the people in my life, or trying to. It was then that my spirit spoke to me. It was dying. It was worn out with the boringness of the life I was living. It gave me an ultimatum, change or I’m checking out. I sensed a spiritual death was about to happen, and in fact that it meant a physical death as well. Only then did a different kind of change start happening. A series of events began that instigated the real change I had always sought. As most of you already know, that was when I began to discover another, deeper self, and the reason for the deep state of depression that had plagued me my whole life. I met Chuck and began a three-year-long shamanic recapitulation.

Suddenly the world looks sugarcoated… It's changed! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Suddenly the world looks sugarcoated…
It’s changed!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

My recapitulation brought me right back to my child self and her ability to perceive a changed world simply by hanging upside down from the monkey bars. I discovered that all I really needed to do to change myself and my life was to look at the world and myself from a different perspective! Sounds simple enough, but it took more courage to do that than any of the other things I had ever done in my life.

By my own volition, I entered a new world. Suddenly, everything began to make sense. Pieces of the mysterious puzzle of self began to fit together, the events of my life interlocking in a way that made perfect sense. I wasn’t incapable of change, I just didn’t know how to let real change into my life. It involved taking action on my own behalf. It involved not looking outside of myself for the change as I had always done—filling my life with so much doing that I had no energy left for anything else, nothing left for myself—but by looking inside. The old frantic, neurotic self was an attempt to keep the truth at bay, but it wasn’t until I turned inward, away from who I’d become in the outer world, that things changed. My perspective on everything changed, just as it had done when I was a child. From a new angle the entire universe suddenly took on a new look and new meaning. Suddenly, nothing was impossible!

So, how do we become the change we want to see? We take action. We change ourselves, from the inside out. Instead of looking at everyone else, blaming, resenting, regretting, whining and moaning about how bad we have it and how everyone else is against us, or doesn’t notice or respect us, the best thing we can possibly do for ourselves is to shut down all of that and be okay with finding out who we really are.

Are we really powerless? Why do we feel so entitled? Who says we’re not capable or worthy? Who says we’re hopeless failures? How did we get where we are? Whose voice rattles through our head, putting us down, keeping us safe and contained? Is that how we want to live? Can we let go of our resentments? Can we free ourselves of our old ideas? Can we take full responsibility for our own life? Can we think for ourselves?

I continue to seek new perspectives, to do things differently, to consider different ideas and to take action to change myself. It’s not that hard. Read something new. Take a walk. Movement alone can bring in much needed energy, offering new fresh air into the brain and body, opening up long dormant synapses. Learn to play, sing, take up a musical instrument. Eat differently. Think in a new way. Look at life from a new angle. Hang upside down every now and then and get a new perspective on the world. Be the change you want to see by changing yourself!

Eternally in metamorphosis,
Jan

Messages from Jeanne

Readers of Infinity: Remove The Blanket!

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Here is this week’s channeled message from Jeanne and Jan. Hope it’s helpful!

Sometimes a shift happens so naturally… just in the waking up to a new day! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Sometimes a shift happens so naturally…
just in the waking up to a new day!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Argumentation accomplishes nothing. Tuning into others, compassionately withdrawing Self and needs of Self, will lead to understanding that argumentation is driven by fear. Fear resides now like a blanket over the whole earth. It is not a good blanket, not a warming blanket, but a darkening blanket. It will not lead to good, but only perpetuate fear.

In order to lift this dark blanket of fear, all who reside now upon that earth must resort to heart-centered awareness, acquiescing to the truth that you are all beings put upon the earth to solve the problems of the human race. You are all, in some fashion, charged with bringing humanity out of the darkness. In your own small way you must begin to change the world. In your own small way you must begin to lift the blanket of darkness that now grows heavy with fear and ignorance. To do so, you must first accept that all other people, in all nations, of all religions and political persuasions, as the same as you.

All who reside upon the earth are one—one energy, one awareness, one light—and yet few are aware of this oneness. Most have become immune to the truth of this oneness, so isolated and distant from the real truth of human consciousness and possibility that they cannot see more than the fibers of the blanket they live under. Beneath the blanket life goes on in a powerless fashion, one day much like the last; the unfolding of life as it happens under the metaphorical blanket not very exciting.

Yet, there is so much more beyond the confines of the blanket! Many have had experiences of this other, blanketless world, yet there are many more who are so afraid to experience the bliss of life outside of the blanket, afraid even of the light of consciousness! Is the blanket of fear really so comforting?

Now is the time to ask the self to take personal responsibility for removing the blanket that lies so heavily over you, to come out into the light and experience a new reality. It’s time to remove your personal blanket of fear, within your own life and your section of the world, and trust that the universe will greet you with open arms and take you on your unfolding journey into new life. Trust that the universe is genuinely positive and energetically prepared to guide you in a new direction as you ask yourself to step outside of your uncomfortable comfort, as you seek a new and changing self and a new experience of life upon that earth.

Ask the self to be open to something new today—even if it’s just a thought or an idea, a possibility, an adventure, a door that might be opening, a book that might lead you in a new direction. Dare the self to make a move in a new direction; take one small step toward embracing that oneness of everything. Today!

Jan's Blog

A Day in a Life: Intent—Uh-oh, It Really Works!

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Be careful in the shaman's world! What may look enticingly beautiful could be deadly if not used cautiously and knowledgeably. - Photo of datura by Jan Ketchel
Be careful in the shaman’s world!
What may look enticingly beautiful could be deadly if not used cautiously and knowledgeably.
– Photo of datura by Jan Ketchel

The Shamans of Ancient Mexico suggest that we state our intent and then let it go, that we send out a call to intent and then let the energy of intent find us, letting it bring us what we need or take us where we need to go. Sometimes our call to intent may be innocently misguided and then we can get into trouble, but if we are working on our personal growth in a sober and balanced manner we tend to be cautious and careful as we tread into unknown territory. It doesn’t pay to be inflated or foolhardy in the shaman’s world; there is too much out there that is eager to hook us and hook into us, desirous of our tasty energy. And so, when setting intent, it is best to be stably prepared for what may come.

Over the past two weeks, I’ve written about entities in my blogs, beings who seem to have come into my dream world for a reason. They’ve been absent for a week, at least I’ve had no recall of them. In fact, I’ve had little or no dream recall at all for the past week. As a result, last night, I decided to use intent to both dream and to remember what transpired in my dreams. To enhance the experience I decided to sleep with Carlos Castaneda’s book, The Art of Dreaming, on top of me. I lay in bed on my back, placed the book over my lower abdomen, and set the intent to absorb the contents of the book, to dream, and to remember what had transpired upon awakening. Perhaps it was a lot to ask.

I got the idea for the experiment from a conversation Chuck and I were having. He remembered that this was how Carlos would read books. He’d lay them all over his body as he slept and when he woke up he’d know the entire contents of the books he’d slept with. Chuck also recently read that Edgar Cayce, the American mystic and medical intuitive had done the same thing. “Yes,” I said, “I remember that’s how he read the Bible when he was a little kid. He became quite an expert interpreter of the Bible at a young age. He’d absorbed the entire book, but also the deeper meaning as well.” This gave me the idea to try it myself, mostly to see what would happen, if I would have an experience.

I already know that Carlos’s books are imbued with the intent of the Shamans of Ancient Mexico; he said this often enough. If you pick one up you are sure to be taken on a ride! The Magical Passes are imbued with that same intent too, not the least of them the Magical Pass of the Recapitulation Breath. This I am personally well aware of, as I discovered during my recapitulation. Once I began the journey, the entire universe seemed to be there with me, fully present, involved in my life 24/7. It was quite a thrilling ride! In just picking up a book about those shamans a strange and wonderful energy flows into the reader, absorbed through the words on the pages of the books, imbued with ancient intent. So, electing to place a Castaneda book over my abdomen had the potential to produce something!

Entities are everywhere, just waiting to hook in! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Entities are everywhere,
just waiting to hook in!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

I had actually placed the book on top of the covers, telling Chuck that if it fell off me during the night, perhaps he’d have an experience as well. “Okay,” he said, clearly curious. And then I drifted off to sleep. Within seconds I was startled awake by the faces of entities, black, gnarly, weathered faces, treelike, intricately carved, as if they had lived for thousands of years. “No,” I said, reasserting my intent as soon as I saw them. “Not you guys,” I said, dismissing them. “I want to have dreams!”

I fell into deep sleep. I also fell into a dreaming intensity that I have never experienced. I woke with a start after three hours of tumbling around inside nonstop dreams that were grippingly engaging. As soon as I woke up, I could not recall a thing, but boy were they intense! I decided it was enough, perhaps too much, and besides the book, which had slipped to my left thigh, was now burning my skin. Heat like I had never felt before was burning through two heavy quilts right into the skin of my thigh, which felt red hot! “I’d better stop,” I thought, and I put the book aside and fell into heavy, deep and dreamless sleep for the rest of the night.

Upon awakening, I told Chuck of what had transpired. It was a mysterious and thrilling experience, but I’m a careful treader into the unknown, and so I intend to go slowly into dreaming with intent. I do have to say though, that I woke up with great energy, more energy than I’ve had in a long time. So, something imbued in that book affected me while I slept. I’m curious to read it again and see what it might be, what might stand out. Perhaps it’s just the energy of the Shamans of Ancient Mexico as they intend it to be experienced, and if so, that’s fine with me!

On the other hand, I do know that my entities appeared for the first time in a week—those gnarly tree faces—and I abruptly dismissed them. Perhaps that gave them license to play with me a little. Maybe they were the ones who took me on a ride last night, proving to me just how much power they really have! I know they are in my life for a reason, and that I’ll have to continue my excursions into the unknown with them as my companions, for better or worse; for the time being we belong together. Whatever really transpired, it was just the right energetic experience I needed, and I’m thankful for that!

On the ride,
Jan

Messages from Jeanne

Readers of Infinity: Air Of Change

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Here is a substantial and very practical channeling message, compliments of Jeanne and Jan, to start off the week!

The signs of change are all around, breathe them in… - Photo by Jan Ketchel
The signs of change are all around,
breathe them in…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Wherever you look, there will you find what you need. Let your heart lead the way now, as you move forward into deeper life—deeper spiritual life, deeper inner life, and deeper physical life. Be present with your whole self now and you will more certainly notice the signs that abound and that surround you on a daily basis.

I speak of inner matters as being of the most importance, so do not shy away from addressing them. Do not turn your back on either the innocent self or the fearful self. Do not hide from the ignorant self or the bashful self. Do not dismiss the lost or the unfeeling self, but strive for connection at a new, deeper level with all of the selves. In this manner, your wholeness will be achieved. In this manner, your life will begin to interweave a stronger, more determined intent, with spiritual prowess and focus your main purpose.

People look outwardly for purpose and meaning, and yet I say that all you need is already within. It seeks uncovering, acknowledgement, and life. To evolve, one must let the self be humble. One must accept all that one is and, without critique, explore the meaning of the deeper issues of the self. You are enough.

Yet, you must also live upon that earth, and so I say, do it with impunity. Live impeccably, yet do not deprive, starve, or deny, for such restriction will only induce craving and resentment. Balance must be firmly established and adhered to, however, for change and advancement to take place. In the beginning, this may cause difficulty, and so, a call to discipline is of the utmost importance. Once discipline is established, balance will be easily maintained.

Balance requires physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health, so strive first for these important aspects of overall health. This healthy balance requires that you do inner work while you also live in the real world. Your human situation requires this of you, and so, you must achieve balance in the situation you find yourself in, in the world you presently inhabit, if there is to be growth in a new direction. In other words, accept your life; begin where you are.

Do not berate the self, but do require adherence to certain principles of health and healthy living. Do not regret or resent the self for past or present behaviors, but take one step in a new direction each day. The simple intent to change and grow is of the utmost importance. Once better balance is achieved, once you are shorn up and feeling strong and committed, then one is prepared to turn and face the old self. In balance, it will be possible to both review and aid the old self while continuously moving forward into a new self. This is how to grow.

Create a new structure to abide by. As the world turns and the planets realign, your progress will be well supported. As earlier mentioned, the signs that will guide your progress and light your way will appear more readable, and more frequently, as you work on the self, simply because you will be in better balance with all of life. Look for these signs as you proceed on your personal journey toward balance. Define balance in your own life, to suit where you are, keeping in mind that balance will be different for each individual. Every human being must discover and enact their own set of impeccable disciplines and strategies. You are all unique, and only you will truly know what balance means for you.

Pretty soon there will be only the open road before you… and smooth sailing ahead! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Pretty soon there will be only the open road before you…
and smooth sailing ahead!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Proceed with the intent to change—this is the key to everything. Once you are well on the way, nothing will hinder your progress. The only thing that will get in the way is old behaviors, fighting desperately to retain dominance. Old behaviors are the greatest enemies any human has to face. But once your momentum is humming along at a good pace, there will be little or no interference from those old enemies, for you will provide nothing for them to attach to. Your speed and your intent will have taken over, and your future will become much more interesting than your past. That is when you will know that you have succeeded in attaining good balance, both innerly and outerly.

I wish you all well in this turning time, in this time of opportunity for real forward progress that is now upon you. Remain aware of it at all times and utilize it to your fullest advantage! Remember: Change is in the very air you breathe, so breath deeply, filling your lungs and body, knowing, at every breath, that you are aiding yourself in changing at the deepest, healthiest level.

The air of change is ready to take you deeper and further into fulfillment now. Bon voyage!

Jan's Blog

A Day in a Life: Lockdown

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Like a monk in a cell, a hermit in isolation, I bear the tension that will lead to resolution… Trapper's hut in the Manchac Swamp, La Place, Louisiana -Photo by Jan Ketchel
Like a monk in a cell, a hermit in isolation, I bear the tension that will lead to resolution…
Trapper’s hut in the Manchac Swamp,
La Place, Louisiana
-Photo by Jan Ketchel

My entities are active. I wrote about them last week, introducing them in all their finery, their insistence upon being in my life. I get that they are necessary if I am to evolve, as they present what more or less lies at my core, my fears and truths alike, and what I must face in the world outside too. So, I’ve done a full recapitulation, why do I still have to deal with entities? you might ask. Well, as far as I know, if we are alive and living upon this earth we all have to deal with entities. It’s just the way life is.

Awareness of their existence is the first big challenge. Have no doubt, they will come; it’s what they are programmed to do. In fact, once we study them, we realize they’ve been present during our entire lifetime. It’s only when we are ready to see them as entities that we will begin to more readily recognize and work with them. After a while we begin to know them on a deeper level, as they come repeatedly, like old friends, bearing the same messages until we no longer need to hear them. We do not need to seek them out, that is dangerous activity, instead we must be patient and alert. We must find out who they are, why they have attached to us, and if they truly belong to us, as there are entities out there that may not really be appropriate for our growth, and those kind are best expelled, though they too hold some message of significance for us. And so, after my dream encounter with my entities last week, I expected they’d return at some point. And they have.

This is how my entities approached me this week, in another dream: I am in a hotel room, on a high floor in a hotel in New York City. I sense that I am being watched. I’m pretty calm, but pretty tense as well. I know that Chuck is downstairs waiting for me, but also that he expects to wait a long time. I don’t seem to be doing anything special in the hotel room. I’m just waiting, but for what? I’m not sure. I go into the bathroom and close the door. Suddenly, I’m aware that someone has locked me in. My sense of there having been someone else in the room with me confirmed now. I try the doorknob. Yup, it’s locked from the outside. Through a chink in the doorframe I see a man sitting in a chair, his back to me. I can’t see his face, but I recognize his clothing, similar to the colorful clothing worn by my entities as they first appeared. My reaction is one of caution. “Do not give anything away,” I tell myself, “stay calm and quiet.”

I don’t want the entity to suspect that I am aware of his presence, which is pretty absurd thinking, since we both know that I’m fully aware of him. At the same time, I decide that calmness, stealth, and planning are my best options. Once again, I am aware that Chuck is waiting for me downstairs in the hotel lobby, that he will become suspicious and come looking for me. At the same time, I’m aware that he won’t even think of coming, because our agreement has been that I can handle things on my own, that I have come up to the hotel room on my own, for a reason that only I know.

I get very calm, soberly calm. Barely breathing, I steady myself and contemplate the situation I’m in. I could find something to pry open the lock on the door. I could somehow break open the doorframe, widening the chink that I can see through. I’m not totally without resources. I already know I will get out, that all is not lost. I feel trapped, however, my spirit suffering in spite of my knowing that this situation, untenable though it feels, is not totally hopeless. I look through the crack in the doorframe again. The entity sits without moving, his back to me, his head still. Almost like a statue he guards the room, his energy like that of a museum guard, non-threatening, but intent upon his task. I don’t really feel threatened by him, only by my own predicament. Once I realize this, I know I must stay inside the locked bathroom and figure some things out. Indeed, I am here for a reason.

Upon further contemplation, I realize that I am being pushed to reconcile something within myself, that this really has nothing to do with the entities in my life, but only with tensions and frustrations within my deeper self. The entity is merely a conduit to my facing this. Why must my spirit be held captive? Why has my psyche conjured up this lockdown situation? What part of me feels jailed or needs jailing?

While I ask myself these questions, there is another part of me that savors the isolation, the time to do deep work, and when I wake up that is what I take with me, the opportunity to sit in deep inner contemplation, my time in isolation well guarded, my entities pushing me to evolve. Even my dearest companion, Chuck, is aware of this, respectful of my need to withdraw into inner silence, as I am aware that he will not come to disturb the situation, that he will not, in fact, be coming to rescue me. This is my gig.

I have been given the go-ahead to do some deep work. This is all that matters now. I find it significant, just as we come into the season of the year when normally we open ourselves to the outside world, to gathering, sharing, giving and receiving, but all of that pales in comparison to what really matters, the deeper issues of the self in this world. I already know that I will be of no help to others if I do not help myself first.

And so, I turn the fear and paranoia of the first part of the dream, the sense of being watched and held captive, on its ear. Instead, I welcome my captor. I intend to let my spirit guide me through this process. In order to discover what I must, restraint and limitation must be enforced. If I am to evolve to a new level, I must force myself to endure a shift. And this is how I am being asked to shift now; to go into isolation for a time, to become innerly quiet and bear the tension, to be resolved to my situation and make the most of it.

I accept that one of my entities has come to guide me through this process of deeper self-contemplation, guarding my door, so that I may be undisturbed, even by those closest to me. The inner journey can only be undertaken alone. And so I thank my entities for their presence in my life at the same time that I face my spirit and ask it to tell me what is going on, what’s happening at a deeper level? I await the answer. In the meantime, I remain fully present in the rest of my life as well, even though I am locked in a cell, contemplating deeper issues. This situation, I am aware, is the next step on my journey.

Locked in and bearing the tension,
Jan