I have a pain in my shoulder. I notice that when I’m distracted or busy I don’t feel the pain; it simply doesn’t exist until I put my attention back onto my shoulder and remember, “Oh yes, I have that pain in my shoulder.” Immediately, I feel pain again. Why is it that the pain sometimes exists and sometimes doesn’t? Is it real to begin with?

I think about other scenarios where I think something and it manifests. One day, Chuck and I were gathering wood for the wood stove at our wood pile. Chuck was reaching high up on the stack while I was reaching down to some small logs on the ground below him. I suddenly heard a voice warning me to get out of the way, that a log could fall on top of me. As soon as I heard the message to get out of the way, I started to pull back. At the same time, as Chuck said, “a log leaped off the pile” and landed on my finger. OUCH!

I wondered if my thinking that a log could fall, actually caused the log to fall. Did my thought create the outcome? Do thoughts have that much power? Sometimes, I might think a thought and then tell myself to dismiss it, that it’s not something I wish to invite into my life, and in such cases the thought does not manifest. Can we really control our lives by our thoughts? Do WE have that much power? These questions have interested me for a long time.

We limit, inhibit, and control ourselves in the way we speak to and about ourselves. We tend to label ourselves, saying that “I am this” or “I am that.” We compare ourselves to others, give ourselves commands and definitions, make statements about ourselves that have impact, not necessarily positive, even if we might intend them as encouragement, such as, “I have to change, I must lose weight, I have to exercise, get into shape, eat better, etc.” We say, “I have to do this or that,” or “I should.” It’s also common to complain about what we think we can’t change. “I can’t… I shouldn’t… I’m not… Why aren’t I…? How come I can’t…?”

I do the same. I tend to say things like: “I have to get into balance. I have to get calm. I look tired today.” These things may have positive underlying intentions, but they in themselves are not helpful. When I notice myself saying these things I apply a little self-hypnosis and turn those phrases into affirmative, self-empowering thoughts. “I AM in balance. I AM calm. I look GREAT today!” When I do this, I notice that I feel differently. The more I say it, the more it becomes true.

Self-hypnosis is really just about offering suggestions to the self. We do it all the time, without even thinking about it, telling ourselves a myriad of things every day, plenty of negative self-talk, most likely, because we have been trained to notice only our imperfections. It might be time to try out some positive self-hypnosis for a change, to discover that real and lasting change comes from within, and that positive suggestions have positive impact.

If we actually listen to what we say to ourselves on a daily basis, how often we say negative or demeaning things to ourselves—I’m lonely, I’m bored, I’m a loser—the more lonely, bored, and the more of a loser we become. Our thoughts are that powerful!

So, watch what you say to yourself. You might be able to prevent a lot of unnecessary pain. If I had dismissed the thought of that log falling on me, might I have prevented my finger from getting crushed? I don’t know, but I’m sure going to try to avoid unnecessary pain in the future!

How can we do that? How can we avoid pain? How can we change our thoughts? We might begin by asking ourselves some questions, depending on our circumstances: Did I bring this pain on myself with my thoughts? Did I invite this challenge into my life? What thoughts do I tell myself that have created my life? Are my thoughts generally negative or are my thoughts generally positive?

Once we discover our own personal method of self-talk, we take the next step of using new language to empower ourselves. Self-hypnosis is an agent of change, but using it is our choice. Are you ready to take responsibility for the self and wake up this power within?

We enter new territory as we give positive, supportive suggestions to the self. “I am healthy. I am happy. I am fit. I am losing weight every day. I am beautiful. I exercise and I am in good shape. I eat right and I am healthy.” As we say these things to ourselves we become them. Yes, we have the power to change ourselves!

About a decade ago, when I was in the middle of my recapitulation, I discovered that I was always expecting everything in my life to be difficult. I expected bad things to happen to me because that was my experience. I expected my car to keep breaking down, people to disappoint me, to be lonely and sad, to always be depressed. One day, I got so fed up with things going wrong and with being depressed that I declared I would no longer be accepting bad things. From that moment on I would only accept good! That very day things began to change for the better. It was in that moment that I discovered just how much power my own thoughts had.

Gaining control over how we speak to ourselves, is a fine practice to accompany our work on becoming kind, loving, and compassionate beings. As we practice putting our attention on our thoughts—the patter that runs through our minds, day and night, about what we should or should not do or be—we will turn those thoughts on their ears. We will take back our power, turning negative energy into positive energy.

As we study how our own negative self-talk affects us, as we change the messages we constantly give to ourselves, we gain understanding in the difficulties that others face. We learn compassion when we realize that we are no different from anyone else.

We really do hold the power to change, the power to create a new reality, simply by how we talk to ourselves.

Here is a positive, self-affirming hypnotic suggestion to say to yourself: I am calm, I am in balance, and I have the power to change,
Jan

NOTE: During the writing of this post my shoulder did not hurt one bit! Hmmm…