A Day in a Life: Impediments—Real Or Imaginary?

There's always a reason for the wall! - Photo by Chuck Ketchel
There’s always a reason for the wall!
– Photo by Chuck Ketchel

I channel a word, a word that sets in motion the challenges and inspirations for the day ahead. We see it reverberating throughout the day, its significance hard to miss. Sometimes we post these words on our Facebook page, as a Soulbyte, a simple and concise thought or idea that will hopefully be helpful, or sometimes we post words from other sources of wisdom. It has always been my intent to use my channeling ability in a way that is helpful to others, and so I have been looking into expanding what I am doing.

The process of learning to speak rather than write the channeled messages has lately been foremost in my personal exploration. Several impediments have arisen, one being my controlling mind, which by the way was yesterday’s word! Control is different, I learned, from discipline, which was the followup word to control. Control is what the mind does, making us think we are in control, but in reality we are not. Nature is really in control. How we work with what nature presents us with takes discipline. Today’s word, impediment, naturally arises as we consider what it means to give up on the idea that we are in control of anything. The truth is that we just can’t control what happens to us, but we can look at what is presented to us as a teaching tool, offering us the opportunity to change and grow.

As soon as I hear the word “impediment” a huge wall immediately appears in front of me. I am like the little mouse in the Leo Lionni picturebook, Tillie and the Wall, wondering what is on the other side. I am sure that I must get beyond the wall. My first instinct is to get over, around or under that wall, letting nothing get in my way. But if I sit and meditate, if I get calm, I begin to realize that the wall, the impediment is there for a reason. I’m supposed to learn something from it. It might just be that I’m supposed to take a momentary pause, not rush ahead but bide my time, sitting in the tension of my enthusiasm until the time is right. When the time is right, suddenly the wall disappears.

At other times, the wall is there for a very good reason. It’s saying Stop! Don’t go this way! It might also be there as a guide to learning discipline, the other word that is so helpful as we learn to navigate life with awareness. As we let go of control and face impediments we must utilize discipline. It takes discipline to enact intent, whether it’s intent that we set for ourselves or that has been set for us by nature and the unfolding of life. Sometimes we are fully aware of this intent, at other times it may take us a while to figure it out, even years or lifetimes.

Anyway, back to my own process. I intend to evolve my channeling into a new format. I’ve gotten so comfortable with the writing format, almost complacent, and my evolving self feels inhibited by it, wants to change, to become available in a different, more flowing way. Hopefully, in the not too distance future, you will be able to listen to the messages from Jeanne. In the meantime, I have some personal impediments to work through, so the wall I am facing at the moment is not just a pause wall, but also a teaching wall.

Discipline the wandering mind… - Photo by Chuck Ketchel
Discipline the wandering mind…
– Photo by Chuck Ketchel

The problem is that, as a synesthete, my brain activates several senses at the same time, so that when I channel as I have been—by writing—more of my brain is occupied and thus happy. When I speak a channeling, that other part of my brain, normally busy with writing, wants to be involved. Often it offers helpful images, but lately this other part of my brain has been interfering, inserting its own agenda—thinking, assessing, and judging! It’s been annoying the heck out of me, so I’m devising new ways to keep it occupied so the messages come through totally pure and unadulterated. It’s a process and a good one for me to be challenged with. So, for the time being, I face my wall. I sit in the shadow of it, learn what I must, and bide my time, knowing full well that when the time is right that wall will disappear and the way will be clear to proceed.

If I could only discipline my synesthesia! But that, I have to accept, is just the way my brain naturally works! You see, nature is really in control, but there are ways to work around it! Oh, and by the way, the little mouse, Tillie? She applied discipline to her wondering, dug a hole under the wall, and discovered that on the other side were other mice, just like her. What once appeared so mysterious and foreign was really very familiar, but the work she had done in getting to that place was well worth it, opening a pathway to new interactions and expanded life. This is what we too learn as we face our own walls, our impediments and challenges, our inhibitions and complacencies. Once we slow down and face our fears and desires, in the true reality of life as a never-ending process, we discover that we are right where we need to be, surrounded by the energy of nature in constant motion, asking us to get busy and dig a tunnel to new life!

Learning to speak all over again,
Jan

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