Jeanne Marie Ketchel
Channeled by Jan Ketchel
Dear Jeanne,
Last night, I dreamed this question: Who is really in charge? In my dream I felt that it referred to integrating all the parts of the self, by first identifying those parts and how they operate. Is this the next step in our inner work?
My Dear One, inner work requires taking full responsibility for the self and, yes, that includes all aspects of the self. One must fully understand how one operates under many circumstances and in many different roles, taking full responsibility for each of these separate aspects of self, those who are known and those who are unknown. In order to more fully explore this process one must understand that this is very deep inner work. It is a process that is mostly played out innerly. As each part of the self emerges it plays its role, most assuredly innerly, having its way there before it ever emerges in the outer world, before it shows itself in an outer way.
The inner process is most intriguing in this manner. Your inner self may shift and a new self emerge long before you are aware of it. And, yes, it may be triggered by what is happening outside of you, but more often than not it is triggered by your own inner workings and this is where your task must focus: on determining who is really in charge inside you. This requires taking full responsibility for the inner self, for all the parts of the self, those who are most often present, those who slumber, and those who attempt to emerge and live in your worlds, both inner and outer.
Who is in control? Who is making you do what you do? Who is creating the havoc and the dilemmas that you face? Who is responsible for your attitudes, moods, feelings, emotional states, and your choices and challenges? Well, who do you think? You are, of course!
Being able to accept full responsibility for the self requires taking responsibility for the inner self as well as the outer self. It requires identifying and studying who you are and how you operate in the world, but more thoroughly how you operate inside of you. And you are really the only one who can do this because you are the only one who is present inside of you.
You may think that you are infected with energy of another, and for all intents and purposes you may be, but that does not relieve you of the fact that your own inner energy, of one sort or another, has been awoken by such an invasion. Do not dismiss any coincidences as merely that, as merely passing things of insignificance, for if you do that you will lose an important point that must be noted. Inner work requires just that, inner work. And who better to do such work than you, the inner you.
I suggest, in order to get to the bottom of the inner process, that you make note of all the parts of the self that emerge. Note how they appear, how they seep into your inner world, how they act once there, and how you feel as a result of their presence. Then you must find a means of acceptance, because this person you may suddenly find yourself to be is in fact you, as odd as that may seem.
You can have many parts without being crazy. You can have many parts and, unless you pay attention to them, you may not know they are there. But once you turn inward and investigate how they operate inside you, you will recognize them and know they are indeed part of you. This process is a process of taking full responsibility for all aspects of self. In so doing you are learning the first steps in integration of self.
I do not ask you to love all these parts of your self, for I do not find that possible until you really get to know them and allow then to speak up as to why they are there and what message they have for you. Only in fully understanding their role in your life will you one day be able to love them, but until then you might as well accept that you may not even like them, so loving then is not an option either.
Find out who you are inside the self. Take full responsibility for all aspects of the inner self by acknowledging the fact that you are really quite mysterious, especially to your self. Allow your self to investigate the true meaning of each one of your inner parts, their roles and their processes, how they work inside of you and what they are showing you about your self. Treat each part with reverence and wonder, for they have found ways to present themselves to you through all your defenses and pretensions, through your oblivion and your denial.
Be amazed at the process that you confront each day, for each day is different. You are different each day too, but you must find out just what that means and take full responsibility for being that new inner being and fully explore the possibilities and potential being offered as you do your inner work.