The earth quakes from below and the winds blow from above as threatening words rock the safety and stability of our world. No reassurance can be trusted from without; we must find our safe place within.
When I was a young boy I pleaded in prayer for a direct experience of God. My prayers were answered in a shattering vibrational experience that overwhelmed my consciousness. The buzz of billions of crickets filled my ears as vibrations became vividly colored and ferociously persistent. I was certain that I would soon dissolve into nothingness. Somehow I managed to hold on long enough for this numinous state to release me from its grip and return me to normalcy.
Once the door to this experience was opened it returned frequently over many years. Every time it showed up I was confronted with annihilation. One day I had the idea to imagine myself as a driver of a race car. It worked. I discovered my safe place behind the image of a steering wheel, my hands gripping the wheel, gaining some control by riding the vibrations. Embodied in this image I could race in circles, carving a boundary of self to withstand the disintegrating force. This image was to preserve my consciousness and sense of self in countless perilous encounters.
Years later I was preparing to leave America, perhaps for good, with my young wife, Jeanne. This was a great leap into an adventure we both desired, but beneath the surface was a serious question as to whether or not our relationship could continue into the next phase of our lives.
Before we left we found ourselves at Great Adventure Amusement Park. I hated, avoided all roller coasters. I decided to challenge myself to find a safe place on a ride called Lightnin’ Loops, the scariest roller coaster imaginable. I needed to take a leap to prepare myself for perhaps an even greater leap into the unknown.
I was secured in my seat. The ride began. I closed my eyes tightly and consciously breathed, relaxing my muscles. As the ride crept up to the zenith, where it might plunge forward or backward—either way a terrifying drop—I intensified my command to go calmer, relax, and breathe!
I succeeded in staying calm throughout that entire first ride and then through subsequent rides, as I obsessively repeated the ride using the same approach, but with eyes open, going even deeper into calm. My safe place evolved, as my ability to call my intent to go deeper into calm evolved. Incidentally, we did set off on our great adventure and left America for a time, confronting the possibility of the annihilation of our marriage and our union, with eyes wide open, acquiescing to the process by going deeper into calm.
For years, like many people, I avoided dental visits so as to not have the experience of numb mouth for hours after a procedure requiring novocaine shots. I always had the fear that I might accidentally bite my tongue because I simply couldn’t feel it until the novocaine wore off. One day I decided to request that the dentist drill a cavity without using novocaine. He reluctantly agreed, reassuring me that we could and might have to stop and administer novocaine, as the pain would likely become intolerable.
Inwardly, I decided to master the pain by simply defining it as a sensation, and also a signal to go calmer. The truth is, I never needed novocaine again for cavities or crowns. I don’t recommend this approach to anyone, but do want to stress the power of intent and self-suggestion to ride through what might commonly be considered very threatening circumstances.
In our current world, nature and rulers are undermining our most basic security. We must turn inward to find our security and control in this free-fall of a world we now find ourselves in. We can access our safe place to successfully ride through these times by using our intent and our self-suggestion.
We cannot stop the world from changing. Mother Earth is in the midst of contractions as she reshapes our world. However, we can access our own inner ark to navigate her waves of contractions. That ark is in our intent.
Go deeper into calm. Breathe. Let every shockwave be interpreted as a signal to go even deeper into calm. Forge a secure boundary around yourself. Steady as you go.
Peace & calm,