Messages from Jeanne, Questions for Jeanne

#356 What To Do With The Big Baby

Today, a Reader asks Jeanne for guidance.

Dear Jeanne,
The message on July 28th also rings true for me, as I learn to detach from the old fears that served to protect me at one time, but need to be put to rest so I can learn to trust the new journey that is ahead. As my spiritual self “cleans house” to get ready for a new beginning, my emotional, and especially, my physical body are taking quite a hit. I not only have “dust bunnies” under my bed…I have “dust monsters” that have been lurking about for a long time! How can I ease some of the pain that I am in now…I don’t want to undo my progress, but my physical body is in a turmoil, as my old ways of soothing my “big baby” are not working anymore. At times I feel like all the work I have been doing is worth it, and at times I question myself as to why I decided to “look under my bed”.

Thank you again for giving me a safe place to ask deep questions that have been with me for so long, but I have been afraid to ask.

Love & Light…D.A.D

My Dearest D.A.D., your question poses a most interesting and common dilemma, what to do with the big baby, especially as life changes and you no longer want to carry that big baby around anymore. Your question of soothing the big baby is actually the wrong question to ask. It is not proper to soothe that aspect of the self, but much better to put it to rest for a very long and even permanent nap. To continue soothing, looking for new methods of soothing, or trying to find a means of keeping the big baby quiet during times of stress, etc., are all things that must be contended with in the process of giving up the big baby.

As you now notice that you have this aspect of the self, so do you have one of the biggest challenges accomplished. The big baby does exist in all who reside upon that earth plane, yet have many of you dealt quite well with this aspect of the self. I suggest My Dear One, that you do not attempt to please your big baby with a pacifier, though this is what you will seek to do in order to attain some peace and quiet. This can be a very difficult step to take because if you aren’t allowed to soothe the big baby what are you supposed to do instead?

I do not suggest being cruel to your big baby self, but I do suggest that firmness and discipline with that aspect of the self are the first lessons to learn in detachment from this aspect of self. You are an adult, not a baby. Your mental capacity is exceptional; your ability to assess the self has been on a long and arduous journey that has now arrived at a place of shift and great change. You are doing excellent work, but you must attempt more fully to place the big baby self in the crib that waits for this cumbersome side of the self.

It is too late to be carrying a big baby around with you. It is too late at night for the big baby to stay up with you watching TV or reading. It is too early in the morning for the big baby to arise with you and enjoy your solitude. You are a mother, and now must you mother your self. This is the next step in learning how to rid your self of the annoying pestering of the big baby. Mother your self now, not the big baby. By this I mean, find your tenderness and your love for your evolving adult self. Offer gentleness to her, offer guidance to her, and allow her to take some much needed time for her self, the fully eager to blossom adult self.

This aspect of self must be regarded above all other aspects of self, respected and paid attention to. This is the seeking self, and this is the self you seek to know and travel forward with. You do not want to know about the big baby self. That aspect of self is predictable, annoyingly present too often, and is not conducive to a seeking life. You don’t need to know anything more about the big baby self. You are good at acknowledging that this side of self attempts to sabotage your progress and that is enough attention. The big baby does not need anything else. So don’t think you need to attend to it, because you absolutely do not. You need to detach from it. But you must not, as I said, detach by offering it a bribe or a treat. You must stand firmly in your truth of it, but move quickly away from it and plant your self immediately in your adult self, your adult frame of mind, you adult body, your adult desires, and your adult needs. You do not need to deny that you have needs, but you must distinguish between the big baby needs and the adult ones.

You must create a balance in your adult life between needs, desires, and responsibilities. It might not be a bad idea to write down the things that are most important to you, the adult. Cross off anything that the big baby writes down. Remain firmly attached to your mature, adult adventuresome spirit self as you make this list. It will do you good, and any other Readers, to do this in order to clear away any confusion about who has control over your needs and wants, and to allow you to focus your intent from the place of adult maturity and not big baby immaturity.

I stress that you must center your self before you begin this process of listing your life’s desires, your present and your future desires. Allow your truths to be written down totally freed of the interferences of the big baby self.

Once this is done, will you have a place to focus your attention when the big baby screams for attention. Pull out your list and regain your focus on the adult self. In this manner will you begin a process of detachment from the big baby self. Eventually will the big baby no longer bother you, not even a whimper, though it takes work to allow the big baby self to know that it is no longer invited to travel with you.

It is desirable to leave the big baby quietly asleep, its paraphernalia packed and placed beneath its crib, boxed away, no longer necessary, not desired, not even a glimpse. But you must take your thumb out of your mouth to start. Then one by one, every aspect that is the big baby self must be removed and packed away, no longer acceptable. This is a step-by-step process that can take years, but it must be done in order for progress to be made. It is the confrontation that must be gone through as you recapitulate too.

Everyone who does a full recapitulation will meet every aspect of the self during the work, and the big baby is one of those aspects that has to be and will be dealt with as the process unfolds. It is inevitable, but necessary for growth.

Do not focus on the big baby self, but allow your struggling adult self to consider it just another child in the family. Teach it what it means to grow up, be responsible, be in the world, and be ready to leave the nest, for that is what everyone must do in life, grow up and go out into the world.

So I urge you, My Dear Strong Seeker, to allow your mature adult self to have needs and desires, and acknowledge that fears are old habits that belong to the big baby. You do not need the big baby, so I can attest that you do not need your fears either. You do, however, need to allow your adult self to take on a new cloak of fearless daring, a new robe of safety in the world, because you are on a new journey, and you know that everything is meant for your learning progress. Find you new cloak, your new self-seeking cloak of desire for life, a real life in a world that is full of wonderful adventures.

Your physical body can handle it; you just have to accept the fact that it can. Your spirit is ready. Your old anxieties just need to be prodded over to the big baby crib and packed up there. Then see what happens. To clean house is a grand idea, just pack up a lot of old stuff as you clean and you will do well. But don’t forget to fully examine your big baby and your adult stuff before packing it away, and make sure you don’t mix them up. Keep them separate so only the big baby items get packed up and not the adult things.

Then set your intent firmly on that list of adult desires and manifest them in your life by allowing them to become your new truths of self. Carry them in your presence at all times and allow them to lead you to the new you. That is where your future lies, in acknowledging your truths.

Messages from Jeanne

#355 The Energy of Place, Home, and Environment

Dear Jeanne,
Do you have a message for humanity today?

My Dear Ones, do not get too caught up in your striving to seat your self atop your mountain of change, but allow life to lead you there. Do not push or overexert the natural flow of your being, but allow your being to be revealed to you as you do your work on the self. Do not declare your self as either one way or the other, but allow your self to grow and change and take on new characteristics as you evolve.

Had I, as Jeanne Marie Ketchel, so defined myself too much would I have never reached the attainment of energy that I now reside in. I can attest to the fact that a seeking life is also a life that requires the ability to shift and change constantly. To flow with your life requires that you allow your self the pains and pleasures that energetic flow will inevitably present to you.

Do not peg your self or pin your self down to a picture that is no longer hanging on the wall. Do not describe your self too vigorously, for in so doing may you adopt aspects that are but meant to be momentary, not long term aspects of self or personality. Flow constantly without resistance to the current of life, the energy of life. Seek always to discover why you are being shown this, or taken here, or asked to encounter that. All of you are asked to be amorphous beings. Swim in the energy of your life as the fish swim in the currents of the ocean. Feel the temperatures of the waters of life, seeking resonant temperatures and finding the streams of energy that suit you for where you are now.

If you find your self stuck then look first at the outer energy. Are your in the right energy field? Do you need to shift to a more conducive environment in order to continue your journey? Are you being asked to change that outer energy? Does it ask something of you? Does it confront you with an aspect of self that needs to be taken care of and pondered? Is your outer energetic position conducive to doing your inner work? Or do you reside in chaos? If so, why do you have a chaotic environment? Is it necessary, for you to learn something about your self?

Chaos, strife, and reticent energetics may signify that you have an inner problem that needs attention and it is but reflected in the mess you have created around you. Or it may signify that you have just landed in the wrong place. But it is up to you alone to figure out if you are being confronted with what you must learn in order to advance, or if you have just not found resonance in your place of habitation yet.

To reside upon that earth in a state of flux, must you resort often to your inner knowing self. You must know who that is and be able to hear the truths being spoken to you, sometimes quite clearly and other times quite indistinctly. But at all times must you direct your questions innerly for the truest answers.

The energy of now is very much an energy of place, of home, and of environment. It is an energy that pushes you to confront the meaning of self as a being who needs the comforts of a home, a pleasant retreat from the world, but also needs a place of inner calm, so that during this time of transition and change you may have resources that attend to all aspects of the self, including the self who resides in that world and needs things that only that world can provide.

During this time of energetic configuration is home environment, and the sense of the self in that home of utmost importance. Perhaps it is time now to seek that home, the one the self needs in order to settle down calmly and have the resources to regenerate energy from. Your environment should support your energetic needs, your needs of the inner self, as well as the needs of the outer self.

Create a home environment during this time that is conducive to the inner and outer needs of the self and you will be doing your self a favor, as the next few months will not allow much time for such homey work. Get it done now. The future energy will be pushing you to accomplish other things that will need attention, and if your home life is not straightened out so will you have to reside in chaos for longer than is good for you.

Present your self with doing the tasks that have been patiently waiting to get done. This is the time to do them. And while you are at it, repairing, fixing, and constructing, put your positive intent into every task. Ask for the good energy of calm to permeate your work with its special brand of resonance, its energy of good vibration that will last through the coming months, enabling you to do your inner work in the core of its resonant outer shield.

Build your place of protection, safety, and deeply resonant self, the self who seeks change and growth, but also allows for release of truths of self at all times. Within your abode must you allow all activities and all confrontations with the self to be legitimate and acceptable. Do not turn from your home the aspects of the self that you do not like but invite them in and learn who they truly are.

Invite in the angry ones, the fearful ones, the shy ones, the big baby ones, and the bitter ones. Invite in the mothers and the fathers and all the little children who request so much of you. Invite in the determined ones, the sad ones, the despairing and the giving up ones. Invite in the stubborn, the reluctant, resistant, and combative ones. Invite in the sweet and innocent ones who reside in your nearness, yet do you elect to push away this aspect of the self all too often as you turn away to attend to the louder screaming ones who grab your attention with their wants.

Do not turn away the greedy ones or the bitterly resentful ones. Do not turn away any aspect of the self who comes knocking at your door, for in so doing do you deny an aspect of self that you must acknowledge at some point in order to evolve.

Your ego self must constantly be confronted now as you prepare your home for whomever may seek entry. Your walls are mirrors and the reflections will show you where your biggest issues lie. Can you accept what you see in the mirrors? Can you accept the self who comes knocking and crawling in your windows?

Even though you have constructed a sound and perfect setting in which to live, do not think that it will keep out that which you need to discover about the self in order to evolve. Keep in mind, at all times, that evolution is your challenge and your goal.

Who are you? Look around you now, and know that you are that person, and that person, and that person over there too. You are everyone you meet, in some way. You are your friends and your enemies. You are your parents, your siblings, your children, your lovers, partners, and companions. You are everyone you meet, and they are you too.

Do not find fault with the self, but do find out what your faults are so that you can better understand who you are. Do not resist the self, but seek where you hide your own aspects of resistance to life. Do not abide in rigidity, but seek to find the rigid blocks you have constructed that keep you from flowing in your life. Do not construct walls of protection to keep you safe from harm, but do ask for protection as you do your inner work, asking for guidance and protection from your old ways that have not aided you thus far.

This energy of now is an energy of change, while at the same time is it an energy of preparedness for the greater changes to come. Continue your good work on the self. Do not hunker down in your room, but do prepare and neaten up your room so that your future work may be done in a well-functioning environment that will offer you ease of progress as things begin to heat up to a pretty intense energy as the time of fire and winter approaches. Think ahead, but provide for the needs of the self now as well.

Messages from Jeanne, Questions for Jeanne

#354 Your Fear is Being Routed Out of You

Today, A Reader asks Jeanne for guidance.

Dear Jeanne,
I wrestle with a very deep-seated feeling of fear every day, or more accurately, every hour of every day and night, and although I can push through the days, it has made sleep nearly impossible for most of my life. I never recognized it as “fear” until recently and have struggled with recapitulation as I encounter it at every turn. I had thought it was active as the result of sexual abuse that happened when I was a child, but I am beginning to feel that it goes much deeper than that, as it seems to permeate every cell of my body. You have said that fear can be one of our greatest teachers, but sometimes I just don’t understand how to face it when I am not really sure what it is I am afraid of. How do I detach from it? Could you please talk some more about this? Thank you very much for your continued guidance and love.

Thank you, Jan and Chuck for your continued guidance and love too.

Love,
Debbie

My Dearest Debbie, it is not simply a matter of detaching from fear that you must contend with, but you must truly discover why it covers you so heavily. Why do you carry this burden of fear? Why do you feel that it permeates every cell of your body? Is this a true perspective? Or have you elected to settle for that perspective and accept your cloak of fear, rather than reject the notion that it is yours to take on?

Does your fear permeate you because you allow it to seep in? Are you inviting it in daily and nightly? Do you open the door to it because you prefer that door over any others? Is fear safer than the absence of fear? Do you wish to remain in a place of fear out of fear of the unknown? Fears of the truth of the self? Fear of discovering your true potential because it may point out to you that you may not have things right yet? Does fear point out to you that your struggles may not be over, yet you elect to declare that they are done? Have you forgotten to look under your bed for the dust balls that need to be cleaned out?

Where are you headed in your life now? Who will accompany you if you drag with you still that heavy dark cloak of fear? Is it possible that it has long been your old teddy bear that is now no longer quite the comfort it once was because you are no longer the child who needed it as protection and safety?

Fear at one time guided you, kept watch with you, and kept you alert so you could be ready for the inevitable beast knocking at your door. Fear was your companion as you sat watchfully waiting. Fear was your friend. Do you not see how fear has been your partner through life, keeping you on your toes, alert to danger, offering you protection so that you were ever wakeful and prepared?

Now have you determined that the cloak of fear does not sit comfortably upon your adult shoulders. You have outgrown it, and your body is telling you that fresh air and new ideas are ridding you of the old deep-seated and permeated fear. This new air is seeking to push out the old fear. New thoughts about the self, new ideas of life, of relationship, and of your place in the universe are pushing at and disrupting the very cell structures that you have lived with all these years.

This is your discomfort, My Dear; the restructuring of every aspect of self that comes as you do your recapitulation. Your fear is being routed out of you by your progress during recapitulation. But you still have much work to do, for fear sits deeply planted, just as old ideas of the self do, and the old habits do. It is possible to replace those old ideas of self, as you have now experienced during your inner work. But you must realize that the process is not a swift and painless one, for it involves not only your mental self and your spiritual self, but your body self as well.

Your entire physical and psychic self is being forced to change. Your physical body, once so cowering in fear, is standing up straighter now. It wants to walk freely, unburdened of that heavy cloak. It seeks to remove it, literally, from your body by pushing out and off the old energy of fear that has so weighed you down. You have not needed it for many years, yet have you continued to wear it, out of habit of comfort.

To truly change now, must you continue to understand energy, for this is a question of replacing your old energy with your new energy. As you recapitulate, so are you inviting a change in inner atmosphere. You are replacing stale old air with fresh new air. You are pushing out old energy that is worn and used, and replacing it with new energy generated by your inner self as you do your work.

You have been unearthing a lot of memories, a lot of old ideas of the self, as well as discovering your child self as an innocent being. This is what recapitulation offers you, the opportunity to re-experience the self differently, with the caveat that as you do, so do you move out of you the old stagnant energy that has sat resident for so long.

So yes, my Dear Debbie, your cells are bursting with the new fresh energy pushing in to your physical energetic self. Of course you will feel uncomfortable once again, even as you did in the past because as that new energy pushes in, so does the old energy of fear get pushed out, activated against its will, but present in its protecting of being shoved out of its habitual hideout.

Your body does not want or need that fear any longer. Your spirit self is protesting against its rallying push to stay resident. But you must remember that you are constantly recapitulating. And that process is not just one of going back, but it is one of constantly going forward too, pushing out the old energy and replacing it with new energy.

So yes, your physical self, your mental self, and your spirit self all must learn what it feels like as this process unfolds. As old habits and ideas of the self are forced to be re-examined, dissected, and removed particle by particle, so will you actually have to feel the changes taking place inside you. And these changes, positive as they are, can be as equally disruptive as the clearing out process and the shift in perspective that you are offering your self.

This process of recapitulation that I speak of so often is allowing you to change. And change at this time in your life is being presented in all aspects of life, inner and outer, spirit and body, mental and practical. Your old habits of self are being asked to shift now, as you interact in the outer world with your changed self in charge.

And you are protesting all these changes. Yet does your spirit push at your reluctant ego self, asking you to allow the energy of change to push through your open doors and windows and show you that fear is but an illusion now, no longer needed, but also no longer wanted either. And that is what you must ultimately realize. Your child self and your adult self no longer want the companionship of fear, but your body self has not kept up with the process. The body holds the last vestiges of your inner work still captive. Let your body release and you will free your energy to really grow now.

Place your self in the hands of the energy of the universe now. You are safe. You are an adult deciding to take the journey of truth and recapitulation. You are innocence and knowledge combined. You are strength and weakness, purity and darkness, anger and happiness, sadness and bitterness combined. These things and much more are in you, and they need reconciliation, and they need release as new energy moves in.

Your challenges in life will return often to test you. That is why you have them. That is why fear has been your constant companion because yes, it is offering you the opportunity to discover something else about your self that you have not quite fathomed. As you pretend to accept it as your burden and teacher, yet do you not hear what it is saying to you. So used to its presence are you that you have not listened to the fact that it is constantly telling you new things, and not the same thing over and over again, as you perceive. It is and has actually been telling you many different things, but you have kept your hands over your ears so you couldn’t hear what it said. It constantly asks you to change, to think differently, to act differently, and to become a different Debbie.

That is your challenge now, to truly dare to become a different Debbie. A Debbie who is unafraid, doors and windows wide open now, with the energy of the universe shifting you and pushing you along on your journey of truth, but also on your true journey.

Find your new inner resonance, and even as it keeps shifting and changing on you, keep up with it. It asks you to speed up now, don’t get lost by being too slow. Keep up. Even if you can’t quite grasp the meaning it offers, move on with it, trusting it and the journey you are on. You haven’t quite decided to trust your own journey. But you really should. It’s meant for you to grow and evolve with. It is your reluctance that stands in your way. As much as you want to grow, you allow your reluctance to clothe you in your old cloak of fear, rather than swiftly throwing it off and barging ahead, which is what your spirit is pushing for, your spirit is insisting that you push ahead.

Find your way to trusting your journey, My Dear One, and you will find that the questions will all be made clear, answered and resolved. Good Luck. Reluctance begone!

Messages from Jeanne

#353 Recapitulated Energy Belongs to You

Dear Jeanne,
Do you have more guidance and advice for us today?

Yes, I do. Be aware that as you do your recapitulation so will old habits, comforts, and desires attempt to circumvent the progress you inevitably will make by capturing your energy. There will be attempts made on the energy you free during recapitulation, to steal it from you. But this freed energy is meant for you and should not be allowed to float out of you and into another, whether friend or foe, comfort or discomfort, resonance or not. Recapitulated energy belongs to you!

Remain aware that as a result of recapitulation will you be releasing an increment of your spirit self, a fragment that has long been held in captivity. It has remained lost in the past, perhaps uncomfortably so, in a place of negation or deep uncertainty. But now during recapitulation will you perceive the truth of its captivity and release it from the old binds that have held it back from progressing with you in life. As that energetic particle of self is revealed and subsequently allowed release from the past, so must you recapture it for use now, allowing it a place in your true spirit self, with intent for its mergence in your energy pool.

Avoid falling into rewarding the self in an old fashion for the work of recapitulation that you do. Instead focus on the next moment of recall and subsequent release. As you do your recapitulation work, so will you discover the rhythm and pattern of your own process. Not everyone will have memories or bodily sensations daily. But some of you may experience a bombardment, an intensity that will taper off for a period until the next bombardment comes. Others will have sustained intense release of memory. Whatever process your body and spirit present you with, so must you accept it as your recapitulation procedure.

Do not attempt to force, curtail, or conduct what is not naturally occurring. Do not attempt to create a recapitulation that is not true or ready for recall. Your body, your environment, your psyche, and the worlds you inhabit will offer triggers enough. Your dream world is one of these worlds I speak of. Your daily life is made up of many worlds too, and these worlds must be accepted and respected for the information they offer you.

Learn to interpret how your own worlds work with you. Your experiences will not be as another’s, but your experiences will only be succinctly apparent to you as you begin to understand how your recapitulation is going to be laid out and conducted. Let it happen, but be ready to take back your energy as it is released, without losing it again to some other greedy force. Such greedy forces are present at all times. They may be in the form of old habits, laziness, or simply as naturally occurring processes in your daily life. But you must begin to question more often how you want to use your energy.

As you recapitulate, your worlds may intersect. They may blur and confuse you, but it is up to you to remain always anchored in reality, as I spoke of yesterday. Your heart center is your number one place of anchoring. It is your place of knowing and naked truth. It is your place of self, true self, and this is where your energy must be placed, both as it is returned and as it is tugged at by outside forces.

Return awareness constantly to your heart center. This is good practice at all times and not only when recapitulating. Place intent and awareness in this central aspect of true self and anchor your thoughts and energy there. This will allow for calmness, but also clear thinking, and clear understanding of the need of the self to find a home. This is the place where your decisions must be made from, for they will be correct decisions, though you may not want to rely on them yet or listen to them. But that is part of the process of life, to make choices in how to use your energy.

As you know, whatever choices you do make are the correct ones, for they will lead you where you need to go in order to learn what you must. Do not consider choices to be wrong choices or bad choices. All choices are right, though it may take you some time to understand what I mean by this. Attempt to find the lessons being learned, the truth of self being revealed, and the guidance being offered.

As I have been teaching you about recapitulation lately, so do I offer you this final guidance today. Do not fault the self for the past. But hold the knowledge that it was perfectly right and necessary, every inch of it, every action, every activity, and every stumbling step you took, whether willingly or unwillingly. Your recapitulation will show you this process, but only if your adult self is in on it. Your adult self is the one who has the ability to explain and contend with the protests and judgments of others still resident in your psyche.

In recapitulation do you attempt to free not only your buried memories and truths, but to also release the impositions of others on your journey. These things may be judgments, critical scolding voices, teachings of conventional authorities, doctrines and proclamations that you have carried in your sinews throughout your whole life. Automatic responses may often be the most true ones, but they may also be the most ingrained false ones as well.

Continue to find your truths. Find your own true voice. Find your own true thoughts, your own true feelings, your own true beliefs. Find your true heart centered self. But most of all, know that the process of recapitulation is a process of rejuvenation, even as it is a process of breaking down the old structures that have held you in place all these years. Find your own strong structures centered in your inner heart knowing. This is the strength that will become the foundations for pure energy to build on, relying on the truth of self and the truth of your self as an energy being.

Focus on recapitulation means focus on growth. It allows for change to happen, with acceptance of the self as many-faceted and living in many worlds, acceptance of the self as able to facilitate energetic responses of truth and intent, and acceptance of the self as available to fully experience the self as energy.

So don’t you want to protect the energy self? I think you do, and I also know that as you experience your recapitulation and discover what it means to have access to more than one world at a time, so will you desire the experience of the self as pure energy more and more. Once you’ve understood what it means, there is rarely the desire to go back. But the choice to go forward must be constantly in your awareness as you do your work. Once it is flowing, so will your energy pick up the momentum and guide you more smoothly. Good luck!

Messages from Jeanne

#352 Your Body is Your Vehicle; Your Energy is Your Reality

Dear Jeanne,
Do you have guidance for us today?

Do you not fathom that the world is not as your eyes perceive it, but as your knowing heart and inner eyes see it? Do you not understand that the things that you wonder about and question regarding the unseen are very legitimate and true queries of what reality is? I know that I present you with many ideas of energy and of how the inner world works, but I also know that these are the things you want validated. So I can attest to the facts of the unseen as being as equally real as the world you live in, that world of touch and taste, and sound and vision. The worlds I speak of, the parallel universes, also have the same senses of taste, smell, sound and vision, touch and feelings to enable you to know the reality of them.

Use now your inner knowing of the validity of your experiences to feed your attempts at gaining clarity. During your recapitulation work you will be confronted with those very real senses, feelings, emotions, and atmospheres of other times, other worlds, other realities. And these are your signs that you are really there, really able to transfer your awareness to other realms. Do not dismiss the reality of your trips into places of old. Learn what you can. Retain your awareness while there, pushing aside fear, the old fear and the new fear to gain a new perspective, even as you retain a foothold in the present.

During recapitulation is it essential that you retain even a thin thread of attachment to your present existence, for that is the thread by which you will return and replant your self back in now as you make your journeys into your jungles of past life and past lives.

You must prepare as an explorer does, understanding that you may encounter the unexpected, but with proper care and preparation may you not be thwarted by what you encounter. To perceive fear while venturing into another world may get you into trouble, for it can capture you in itself, keeping your awareness caught there, rather than allowing your awareness to overcome the fear so that clarity may reign. What I am asking you to do today is to go to battle against your fears. They are your biggest enemies, but also your biggest challenges and teachers as well.

Your fear is pointing out to you where you must recapitulate. So if you have been wondering how to get started on your journey into your self, go to your biggest fear and confront it. Place your self before it with awareness, rather than allowing your self to fall into its waiting arms. If you rush up to it and go right into its embrace as you have done many times so will you but remain caught by it, unable to see it clearly, but comforted in knowing that you are in a familiar place.

I suggest that you stand back and observe what all of your senses, your emotions and your physical body are feeling and doing as you observe your great fear standing before you, looming over you with it fangs dripping and its claws pulling at you. Go to your own body, go inside, and find out what is happening in there, rather than wrap up in the blanket or the net that fear attempts to throw over you.

Question your attachment to your fear. Why do you need it? Why do you resort to it over and over again? Why does it cause such anxiety and restlessness inside you? Allow your inner sensations to respond to you, while your clear head of knowing asks the right questions.

Do not allow the big baby to reach for its usual pacifier. Do not allow the inner you to run and hide either. Do not pull out the tent you carry on your back for protection, or the armor you burden your self with. Instead use your senses, use your clarity, and use the truth of your bodily responses to tell you what is going on.

Be as an explorer, an investigator. Take notes; document your reactions, your attempts to flee, your old habits, as you once again stand before your fears. Study your self. Become a scientist. You are the experiment. That is really all recapitulation is about. You are going on a scientific exploration into the self. As an observer now must you dissect the self and fully understand why you do the things you do, not questioning and answering in the old way, but questioning and answering with the new truthful way.

Question and answer now in your nakedness. Remove your old habits, your padding, your means of protection and avoidance, and present your self to your self now as a purely innocent human being, fallible, imperfect, nakedly present, wanting to really learn about who you are. Your ego is your biggest defense, and this you must learn to shed. It may take some time because an ego is something you have been taught to strengthen, but it is in fact merely blocking you from your truths.

Can you accept the fact that you are a big baby in diapers, who wants to be taken care of, fed, and tended to? Well, if you can allow your self to accept that aspect of the self, then you are well on the way to shedding that tough shell of an ego that you have been polishing and spiffing up all these years.

Remember what I have said about energy? That you are all energy? If you are but comprised of molecules of energy, then what does it matter if you are a big baby? And what does it matter if your ego is overpowering you at every turn? And what does it matter if you can’t find your way? If you can accept that you are nothing more than energy, then can you let go of all the thoughts and ideas of the self you think you must uphold too.

Energy is not simply nothing but molecules though. Once you discover your own energetic sense of self, will you understand that you are comprised of everything. But you can only have access to such knowledge of everything if you have no ego to get in the way. A big ego, including a big baby self, will sabotage your knowing of everything, and it can get you into trouble, inviting in negative aspects of the dark side, and that is not what you are seeking now.

As you work on your self, as you do your recapitulation work, please remember that what you seek is truth of the self. You seek to strip down the untruths and the props that have been so useful during your life in that one world, but are not at all viable in other worlds. You must find your trusting innocent self again, and become armed only with the knowing of what it means to be an energetic being in order to understand and navigate other worlds.

Your recapitulation work will lead you to seeing and believing what you experience as your truths. Your work in other worlds may seem unreal when you step back into your daily life, but know that it is energetically more real than the hand before your face. Use that hand to ground you as you confront your beastly fears. Look at it constantly to ground you in the reality of self, to remind you to stay in your body and to investigate your self as a scientific experiment. Use your body to guide you. For even as you are pure energy, so do you reside in that body for a reason; to learn what it means to be alive, to learn what it means to be energetically present, and to learn what it means to be an energy being capable of being in two worlds at once.

Your body is your vehicle; your energy is your reality. See where the two of them take you next. Stay with them both as they lead you into other worlds, the world of the inner self first, then later, once you have learned how to travel within the self, may you be ready to travel beyond the self.

So work on the aspects of the self that I have laid out today: the ego self and the big baby self. First accept them and understand them, utilizing them to get you where you can access your energy self, your body self, and your knowing self, all of these things based in the truth of the self. Learn who you truly are, letting go of your old ideas, notions, judgments, and captured movies of the self that you play over and over again. Break up and throw away everything you think you are and start over with nothing but your energy self. Then will your recapitulation really start. For the true energy self is fearless, brave, all-knowing, and eager to shift the journey into one of truth and exploration.

I will speak more on this again soon. Time to go now.

Chuck Ketchel, LCSWR