All posts by Chuck

Chuck’s Place: Thinking, Feeling, Relationship

Thinking… Feeling…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Thinking and feeling are two diametrically opposed psychological functions. Although they share a judging characteristic in common their methods of assessment are very different.

Thinking is an analytic process that breaks down what it perceives into component parts which it then logically compiles to explain why things happen as they do in reality or how to make specific things happen in reality. Thinking freezes reality, like taking a picture, and then fragments this static image into component parts. Thinking defines itself as capturing objective reality and rendering it knowable through its abstract vocabulary of thoughts.

Feeling, in contrast, assesses reality based on a subjective energetic reaction that registers in the body with an emotional affect defined as feeling. Thus feeling would look at an object in the world and decide if it had value based on the feeling it evoked when perceived through the senses. Whereas a thinking person might be drawn to purchase a picture based on the success of the artist and the quality of the craftsmanship, a feeling person might reject the painting because it elicited a feeling of boredom or distress. “How could I possibly have such a depressing painting in my home. I don’t care what it’s worth, it’s worthless to me!”

Feeling, in contrast to thinking, stays connected to the dynamic whole of a person or a scene. In order to make its assessments it needs access to a fluid interconnectedness with another being. In fact this allows feeling to continually refine its assessments, as it may change its feelings about someone or something as it experiences them more fully in different situations.

In the area of assessing human relationship, thinking and feeling, as might be expected, approach things very differently. Thinking might determine that a potential partner makes sense if they share similar interests, educational backgrounds and hold compatible goals. In contrast, feeling might value a more instinctive reaction of attraction to a potential partner to determine the worthiness of pursuit. Clearly, both functions have their legitimate place in such a significant enterprise as pursuing a relationship.

Many a relationship has failed because a purely instinctive basis does not offer enough to meet the requirements of a fully committed relationship. On the other hand, a purely logical choice of partner that adds up fully on paper but lacks an instinctive connection is destined for serious trouble.

Clearly, thinking and feeling both have their valid contributions in deciding upon a serious commitment in relationship. Sometimes it’s wise to table the feeling and listen to the mind, sometimes it’s wise to stop thinking and follow the program of the feeling.

Though inherently oppositional in nature and function both thinking and feeling have a valid place in decisions of relationship and ought each to be consulted and given their due. Thus with Descartes we might agree: I think, therefore I am, but add: I feel, therefore I am alive!

Thinking and feeling,

Chuck

Chuck’s Place: It’s All In The Name

John’s Gospel begins with the statement, “In the beginning was the word… and the word was made flesh.” A new child is assigned a name from which its life “fleshes” out.

Surnames are a given. They issue from the ancient lineage, the journey of one’s genetic tribe, a substrate of the deeper unconscious self, filled with many possible manifestations, “oh, he has his eyes, her nose, his temperament,” as the newborn is fitted into the ancestral backdrop of the tribe.

What's in a name? More than you think! - Photo by Jan Ketchel
What’s in a name? More than you think!
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Despite the power of the ancestral lineage, the more operative, active name for this life we are in is our first name. This name is assigned, by parents, by whatever system of whim or obligation, to be the name we will be known and defined by. In contrast to our ancestral surname, our first name is how we will be most known in this life.

Outwardly, our name carries with it all the associations our family might have with that name, as well as associations to others with a similar name, not to mention the famous or significant personalities who have been identified by the same name. In short, the expectations and perceptions of the outside world will color and define who we will be seen as in response to our given name.

Inwardly, all names derive from ancient archetypal roots that are associated with qualities of nature, myths, and gods. Hence, our name activates archetypal qualities that are expressed as central themes in our lives. For example, I was assigned the name Charles at birth after my vibrant maternal grandfather, a self-made man. Charles issues from the Germanic karlaz, which translates as free man.

I can think of no better words to capture the leading motif of my own life. I left my family as a teenager and struck out on my own, seeking freedom. I was drawn to Carlos Castaneda, a derivation of Charles, who taught complete freedom from the social order and the freedom to travel as a free spirit in infinity unencumbered by dogma. Carl Jung, another derivation of Charles, has been my other ultimate guide to freeing the self from the intrusion of dissociated or unknown aspects of the self.

With consciousness comes freedom. Together with the teachings of Carlos and Carl, I have been able to extend my reach for freedom in my clinical work, helping others to recapitulate and gain freedom from the blockages of their unknown selves.

My wife was given the name Jan because her mother, as a new teacher, saw young girls struggling to write out their long, complicated names. This led her to determine that girls were dumb, and thus she gave her own daughters short, three letter names, perhaps so they might not appear dumb to future teachers. It wasn’t until later in life that Jan learned this was the reason for her name, but nonetheless the determination that girls and women are just not as smart as boys, applied to her personally before she was even born, has been one that Jan has had to struggle against and prove otherwise her entire life.

In the outer world, when Jan lived in Sweden, she was called up for military service, for Jan was a man’s name in Sweden. Outwardly, naming a woman Jan proved rather foolish. This is the name made flesh.

John, of which Jan is the feminine form, was the name of several Biblical characters and disciples of Christ, including the one I quote at the beginning of this blog. It is an important name borne by saints and popes, as well as royalty. Not dumb after all. At the deepest archetypal level, the Hebrew derivation means God is gracious, and I cannot think of a better description of Jan, who has channeled her way to God at the level of her soul, for she is utterly gracious. Of course, it does not escape me that her Soul Sister in infinity, Jeanne, also derives from the same root, John. As a child Jan never liked her name, but now is quite pleased to have it!

It is interesting to study the roots of the name Donald, given current world conditions. Donald is derived from Old Celtic elements dubno (world) plus val (rule). Thus, one who possesses this name may indeed be challenged with the issue of power and world rule. How one would manifest or resolve this charge could vary greatly, but the underlying motif of reckoning with an urge to rule broadly is likely inevitable.

Here one is reminded of the Don, the term affectionately applied to the Italian Mafia godfather who plays a paternalistic role, as well as don being applied to the Nagual, the leader of a shamanic party, as a sign of respect.

When we explore the etymology of our first name, it is valuable to broaden the exploration to include mythological parallels. For instance, a Lauren, whose name derives from laurel, might explore the myth of Daphne and Apollo where transforming into a laurel tree was Daphne’s sanctuary.

In Carlos Castaneda’s lineage it was recommended that people play with renaming themselves, as a tool to erase personal history. The exercise was intended to break the energetic constraints imposed by the expectations attached to one’s given name.

This practice reminds us that though our lives may have been largely defined by the outer expectations and inner archetypes that define and control a name, we are ultimately free to move beyond those constraints and be in charge of our own destinies.

I do suggest, however, that before we move beyond our given name, we explore it fully in the flesh, and realize and resolve the challenges it has presented us with in this life.

Named and Nameless,

Chuck

Chuck’s Place: Acceptance

The other day a blog flew out of me entitled Enantiodromia. It was slated for publication today. The next night I woke up several times with dreams about acceptance. I got up yesterday and acquiesced to writing a new blog entitled Acceptance.

Jan got up yesterday and quietly channeled the Soulbyte for the day. She read it to me. It was all about acceptance and acquiescence. Of course, I’d shared nothing of my nighttime adventures nor morning resolve with her before she channeled. It’s just how things flow.

Enantiodromia defines the phenomenon of a total reversal from one action to another; what goes up must come down. One day I had completed a blog, the next I swung to scratching it and writing a new one, this one here.

My dream in the night began with an encounter with a tired middle-aged, somewhat unkempt, poorly shaven merchant going through the motions of collecting payment for a needed service. He showed no enthusiasm as he dealt with customers; he was a bit of a curmudgeon and I strongly doubted the value of his service given his unfriendly attitude. Just a bored merchant, exploiting a human need, not even happy about all the money he was collecting. I deeply felt the meaningless of his routine life, yet he continued it without question.

Next, we were at a courthouse, in a lunchroom on a break. The merchant sat eating alone. Another man became deeply outraged at the merchant for his unethical, insensitive attitude toward the people who were buying his services. As he protested loudly, I deeply felt his need to confront the merchant for this lack of care to the true needs of the people dependent upon him.

All is part of the whole... - Photo by Jan Ketchel
All is part of the whole…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

Just as I was about to merge with this man’s agitated emotion and action, my attention was drawn to another, older man, sitting in the cafeteria with a broad, calm, welcoming smile on his face. I watched him scan the room with his eyes, in complete acceptance of everyone in the room, of all the stages of life and folly, seeing everyone as part of the greater whole of life, everyone having a place in it. Suddenly, I was relieved of the tensions of the merchant’s mood and that of the activated protestor—I too was in acceptance of the wholeness of everything.

Life is bipolar. Electricity requires positive and negative poles. Rivers require high and low locations to flow. When we are in the river of life energy—as I was as I felt the energy of the merchant and the agitated protestor—we find ourselves impacted by the tension between the opposites and tend to identify with one or the other. A different resolution comes about if we can step outside the river of energy and notice how everyone is part of and necessary to the entire picture. This leads to a comprehensive acceptance, as presented by the third man in my dream, the calmly smiling onlooker.

Of course, acceptance does not simply mean sheepishly acquiescencing to how things are. However, it does start with a valuing of all persons or things present as necessary parts of the whole, all as equal and necessary in the greater picture. Tao might be better served with a change in attitude, but polarity is the reality of life in this world.

To seek resolution through blame and dismissal only increases the probability of retaliation in an enantiodromic reaction to one-sidedness. In contrast, acceptance of the value of all parts, no matter how polarized, sets the stage for real negotiation.

Blog delivered,

Chuck

P. S. You might also want to listen to this week’s audio channeled message re: the river of life: The Individual Path

Chuck’s Place: The Trickster King In Us All

I recommend a viewing of Netflix’s The Crown. This modern exposition of the sacred transformation of the human being, anointed and born again as the divine queen in the cathedral, portrays the rich and basic archetypal substrate of the human psyche; the same archetypal substrate that has us project onto our president the ordering of the life of our nation, believing the presidency to be the design, for us, of the divine.

Who should wear the crown? - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Who should wear the crown?
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

America, of course, long shed itself of the silliness of the monarchy, but we could not erase our psychic predisposition to find sacred order and balance in our president. Our coronation at the cathedral is the ballot box, our king is our president, in whose presence we are equally predisposed to encounter the awe and the awful.

With President Obama, the earthy black shadow rose to kingship and he glowed with progressive intelligence. America, having apparently valued its shadow, appeared to be on the cusp of anointing the feminine to her goddess rank, just in time to rescue the ailing Earth. But alas, America was unexpectedly charmed by the Trickster King, Donald Trump.

What becomes evident is that America did not resolve its shadow by electing Obama. The shadow was stored beneath the surface and the trickster took full advantage of exposing it and tapping into its energy. We were not ready for the goddess. We hadn’t truly reckoned with the shadow.

The Trickster King is the full embodiment now of that shadow, and we must reconcile with it. In a nutshell, that shadow is the ultimate ego self who exalts itself in godly towers. This is the ego that truly only cares about itself, its needs, its wants, its security, its power. This is the ultimate individualistic ego that feels no responsibility for the safety and needs of the world, only insofar as it impacts its own interests. It’s alway only about “me and mine,” it says. In fact, “me” has become extremely narrow by definition, as the impetus now is on a “pure” America, where only those truly entitled to the Kingdom may reside.

As a psychotherapist, I have experienced marriages, families, friendships, business relationships, and relationships within the medical caregivers community experiencing major earthquakes as the fault lines of greater connection have been shattered and threatened by the divisiveness of this election. The grassroots impact of this election has indeed infiltrated even the sanctuary of the bedroom.

America is forced to face and reconcile with its huge shadow in all relationships in daily life in order to find its way to genuine connection where the ground will be properly prepared for the election of the feminine. We have a lot of work ahead of us.

We must face the truth, that though we have long espoused in our faiths and politics heart-centered compassion, the truth is, we mostly live at the level of self-centered survival. Apparently, it is necessary for this to be acted out and lived under our current kingship. Let us not make the mistake of an earlier generation that projected as a nation their divine center onto their divine king: “Adolf Hitler is Deutschland, Deutschland is Adolf Hitler.” *

It is not my intention to identify Trump as Hitler but to draw attention to the human tendency to invest leaders with the divine and follow them blindly.

We must thank and respect our trickster president-elect for mirroring our truth to us, but must individually, as true Americans, secede from the monarch, withdraw the projection from the Trickster King and face the truth of our own inner kingdoms. We must face our own ego king self, and ask: Who will rule the personality? The ego, or the  the divine Self within us?

Time to go into the tower and restore balance... - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Time to go into the tower and restore balance…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

The Self is the divine spark within us all who rests in the truth of our heart center. Our ego’s task is to realign and truly embrace the rule of this heart center and in so doing release us from its own egocentric worldview.

As we succeed in this individual effort we become like the ancient Taoist rainmaker who in restoring balance within triggers the restoration of balance without. As the rains return, the crops are nourished and life thrives anew. Sometimes those rains must provide great floods for life to truly be renewed. Never lose sight of the ark of the heart. It’s near, dear, and a definite lifesaver.

Remaining heart centered,

Chuck

* Quote from C. G. Jung’s Visions Seminars Volume 2, p. 1332

Chuck’s Place: Making Do

The following guidance may not satisfy the anxiety, fears, and anger of the moment, but I am obliged to pass on what I received from my trusted guide of 45 years, the I Ching, when I asked the following question: What is the correct attitude in this coming time of darkness?

Out of the darkness the light will rise again... - Photo by Jan Ketchel
Out of the darkness the light will rise again…
– Photo by Jan Ketchel

The reading I received was hexagram #54, The Concubine, Making Do. Please be advised that though the hexagrams of the I Ching are archetypes, that is, configurations of energy that remain unchanging, the manifestations or actual representations of the archetypes change with succeeding generations. Thus, the anachronistic notion of a concubine in today’s world represents an unacceptable condition that one is forced to live with. Advice is offered in how best to survive it and have influence in a time of Making Do.

For better or worse, America married Donald Trump on November 8, 2016. The bride of Obama, the progressive populace, has been displaced and relegated to the lowly status of concubine. We all remain part of the same Union, but she/he, who until now enjoyed dominance in governance, must now come to know and be led by the other side. That other side has attained the legitimacy of the White House, and so it stands.

The I Ching does liken this national predicament to a family that houses both a legitimate wife and a concubine. Though both women live in the same home only one has legitimate power. We are at present a nation completely divided in half, but with only one half legitimately represented and in power. Hatred and blame will only further the divide. The overarching principle that is accentuated in hexagram #54 and is key to weathering through the divide is affection. As the I Ching states: “Affection as the essential principle of relatedness is of the greatest importance in all relationships in the world.” We must not forget this most important advice as we enter a new era where affection seems already greatly lacking.

The first moving line of hexagram #54, nine in the first place, offers special counsel stressing the correct decorum for one relegated to a lowly status while nonetheless finding a safe and meaningful place within the nation. The guidance is clear: withdraw modestly into the background, do not attempt to overstep bounds or usurp power that one is not entitled to.

In a second example offered by the I Ching, a man of lowly influence is friends with a prince and is taken into his confidence. This man remains tactfully in the background behind the ministers of state and though hampered by his status, as if he were lame, he is nonetheless able to accomplish something by quietly working behind the scenes.

The key to the guidance here is the checking of hubris, entitlement, and self-importance. If one can tactfully withdraw attention from oneself, one may indeed exert influence. In the shaman’s world this is the exercise of losing self-importance when under the dominance of a petty tyrant. By dropping self-importance, the ego, one is able to accomplish something that ultimately brings down the tyrant.

Nine in the fourth place of hexagram #54 offers additional special guidance, depicting a maiden who refuses an alternative arrangement to a legitimate marriage. Through her patient, virtuous waiting she is rewarded with a late but most fulfilling marriage. The guidance here is patience and containment. Remain inwardly true to your values and ideals though the tension of the time of waiting and the challenges presented over the next four years will be great. In patient acceptance of where things are, but inwardly remaining true to and keeping alit the true light in the heart, we will indeed be rewarded with a new dawn.

Finally, though the I Ching advises that for the present we must “make do” with a highly virulent and volatile predicament, in patience and containment, it stresses that the light will again be restored and reassert its guiding influence over the darkness that now descends upon us. Eventually, it teaches us, the right light will shine again, for the future of this hexagram is Spring: the return of the light.

The I Ching translates as, The Book of Changes, that is, all things must pass, nothing is forever.

Peace,

Chuck