A first. Jan emailed me her proposed blog for this week, an excerpt from her forthcoming book, The Edge of the Abyss. I say “a first” because generally Jan writes and publishes her blogs before I even know what they’re about. She rarely knows herself until she sits down to type.
As I read her proposal, I cringed protectively. I was concerned that the description of reality she was sharing would be too potentially triggering for those who might read it. It’s incredible writing, with deep value for those who choose to read the book, but I felt it needed to be wrapped in the protective warnings her books offer.
This protective cringing occurred the week before when Jan had published another excerpt from her book—I cringed for the same reason. And once we had discussed my concerns, Jan put a warning on the blog and on our Facebook post regarding the potential for triggers to those who are doing deep work in confronting their own traumatic events. And so perhaps there was a part of Jan that uncharacteristically decided to pass this new blog by me before electing to publish. Her own attachment to her personal experiences at this point is gone, her only concern now is to help people, to show them the way to freedom.
I’m reminded of Taisha Abelar’s cohorts* having to stop her from bringing her two inorganic being friends to an evening lecture at Omega in 1995. They were concerned about the potentially shattering impact that this broader encounter with reality might cause the members of the audience—a visitation from the fourth dimension, a dimension generally hidden behind the veils of the third eye. Taisha merely said, “Oh, really?” She hadn’t even considered the possibility, so used was she to their presence in her own life.
When I expressed my concern to Jan, she immediately agreed. Like Taisha, she simply hadn’t considered this concern, so deeply detached personally she finds herself from the world that once froze her in traumatic ice. Things that once horrified her no longer phase her. She matter-of-factly discusses them and moves on, no triggers.
When Carlos Castaneda advised that we suspend judgment to journey into the true nature of reality, into life beyond judgment, he was taking us deeply into accepting what is, freed from the parameters of what we find acceptable. Only in learning how to suspend judgment will our experiences in the world of true reality have deeper meaning and value. Recapitulation opens the door to fully knowing and accepting what was, however horrific, freeing the self to fully be able to encounter reality without the cushion or necessity of veils. Such was Taisha’s experience; such is Jan’s experience.
Most importantly, however, is that we consciously decide to take the recapitulation journey. As Jan pointed out in her alternative blog this week: When we are ready we will know more fully what we need to know. Perhaps it won’t be this spring or this life, but spring will come, and new life will blossom.
As we discussed Jan’s proposed blog we decided to throw a coin, to let the coin decide. And so we asked infinity whether or not Jan’s first blog should be presented. “NO!” came the response. And so, without attachment, Jan acquiesced and went on to write something else.
The decision to read or not read Jan’s next book is a decision that people will have to make for themselves, in full awareness of the disclosure of the depth of truth to be encountered in its pages. The long awaited book arrives in a few weeks!
* Taisha Abelar and her cohorts Carol Tiggs and Florinda Donner Grau were the apprentices, along with Carlos Castaneda, of don Juan Matus.