In containment does one learn the deeper lessons of the self. If one but turns inward and allows for truths to surface, one will face both the best self and the worst self. Yet such encounters will teach the true lessons in life, the lessons that all must hear in order to evolve.
It is not a punishment but a liberation to hear the truths of the self spoken in this manner. It is not a chore but a joy to encounter the deeper self and all aspects of that deeper self. It is not painful but freeing to face all that one is made of and know the depths of the self so fully that nothing remains a mystery.
In knowing the self so fully, one becomes an open channel for new adventures in life. One becomes empty, and detached from that which binds the soul to eternal misery, and fully available for other work. But first the inner work must be deeply sought after and fully accomplished. In containment of self is this possible.
Sit with the self daily and contend with the inner world that reveals itself. Release and relief will come to aid you if you let it, and then you will begin to notice the work of the self having effect, taking hold, revealing the mysteries that now puzzle you and keep you constrained.
Seek refuge in containment of self. That is where freedom from everything lies. In sickness and in health turn inward and ask to be shown the truth. Be patient as you wait for your inner process to get underway and gain momentum. Stay with it. Your rewards are plenty.
Thank you Jeanne and all of our guides in infinity. Channeled with love, by Jan.
Those who have returned from near-death experiences report that upon leaving their bodies and entering into an out-of-body state, their entire lives flash before them in a single instant. Every nook and cranny of life lived is relived and reviewed. This is the ultimate recapitulation experience that we will all encounter, an essential component of transitioning from this life to the next.
The Buddhists are particularly cognizant of this experience at death and spend a lifetime honing skills of detachment so they will not get caught in the trappings of fear, regret, or longing for life lived in this world. Lack of preparation for this encounter upon dying is a major karmic variable for future incarnations, according to Buddhist tradition, as one’s future life is influenced by enduring attachment or non-resolution of life lived in this world as one travels through this moment of recapitulation.
Though the Buddhists spend a lifetime preparing for recapitulation at the moment of death, within Carlos Castaneda’s lineage, shamans discovered that recapitulation could be consciously and volitionally performed while still in this world. These shamans discovered that by recapitulating before dying we not only enhance our options upon death, but vastly change our experience of life in this world. Through beginning an early recapitulation we are afforded the opportunity to make ourselves whole, and with our full energy available to us now, achieve fulfillment in this life.
As a clinician, I returned from my journey into the shamanic world of Carlos Castaneda with the knowledge that recapitulation was a tool for total healing. Regardless of the shattering impact of the most horrific trauma, recapitulation enables us to retrieve our fragmented selves and energies, as well as disentangle ourselves from the binding energies of others that have compromised our growth and fuller potential in this life.
Recapitulation is an inevitability. We will all recapitulate our lives when we die. If we can’t face and know the full truth of who we are and the life we’ve lived now, will we be able to do that at the moment of death? Will we be so overcome with fear, regret, and longing that we will have to return to relive it all again?
Excavating and sculpting the self…
The shaman’s gift of early recapitulation offers us the opportunity for deep fulfillment in this life, as well as the evolutionary advantage to advance beyond reincarnation upon completion of life in this world. Furthermore, recapitulation is a magical pass. Magical passes have been performed for centuries in the shaman’s world. Magical passes are imbued with the intent of all those shamans, and anyone who undertakes a recapitulation is supported by the vastly helpful intent set by those shamans.
Here is an excerpt from Jan’s upcoming book, On the Edge of the Abyss, the second year of her recapitulation series in which she experiences this intent: “It’s eerily apparent that no matter what arises in the unfolding of this process, in which Chuck and I are but a small part, there is a sense of everything fitting together. We both remarked on that yesterday, as if we had been thinking the same thoughts. In some way, my dreams always show me where to go next—deeper truths revealed while my conscious self is out of the way—while the memories come in such a way as to suggest that everything is orchestrated. And I sense that whatever or whoever is helping me is worried about my energy. I sense that it wants to keep me whole and safe, deeply caring that I arrive at a place of total healing.”
When we recapitulate we must encounter the full truthful impact of life lived. How could it be otherwise? If we skip over that, we haven’t truly retrieved and mastered our real selves and our real experiences. However, we must keep in mind that we are protected and guided by a power greater than ourselves, by the ancient intent of recapitulation. That intent is that we fully revamp our lives, that we fully sculpt our energetic selves, and that we fully release all the burdens of extraneous energies formerly bound to the experiences of the unknown self. With this now fully-known and energetically-replenished self in charge, we are freed to live life to the fullest and to fully love the life we are living.
We gather our books, our notebooks and writing pens, and go into retreat. We leave everything else behind. Perhaps we take a cup of tea, a jug of water, an apple or two, but little else. We leave the phones, laptops, all forms of communication with the outside world, and disappear. No one knows where we are. For the time we’ve allotted ourselves, we are free.
We sit amongst the catbirds, quietly conversing or silently reading. We meditate, or perhaps even doze in our chairs. A doe and her two fawns come out of the woods and walk past. We are so invisible in our intent to retreat that they take no notice of us. We are present yet not present.
We reject all attachments, including the needs of those closest to us. On another day of retreat we sit in our canoe on calm waters. We drift, going nowhere. We let the world rumble by, all its troubles and turmoils, all its fears and desires, all its crisis and calamities. We are free.
We know what awaits us upon return to the reality of our world, yet we allow ourselves to turn from it as often as possible. In this manner we offer ourselves balance, we create a container in which to nurture our spirits. We offer ourselves sacred space in the midst of everyday life. We lift the veil of one world and enter another, rejecting the chaos that constantly seeks attachment. In the simplest of ways, at little or no cost, we seek retreat as often as possible.
Choose a new path...
Perhaps we take a walk at dawn, or at midnight. Perhaps we go to a movie. Perhaps we sit on our deck as the sun rises. Perhaps we build a fire and watch its sparks light the night. Perhaps we take a friend out to dinner and sit in a calm garden cafe. Perhaps we take a yoga class, or hike along a new path. All of these things offer retreat from the energy of the world constantly stirring around us.
Part of going into retreat, part of disappearing for a few hours or a few days, requires careful planning. It requires honing detachment by setting limits on the self and the outside world. It requires that we reject the chaos. It requires that we leave everything behind that might interrupt our retreat, anything that might interfere with our solitude. Often enough it requires leaving behind worry and fear, leaving behind the thoughts and ideas that we are needed, that we are important, that the world might collapse if we are not available every minute of every day to those who need us, want us, rely on us for whatever reasons. Going into retreat requires honing nerves of steel while simultaneously extending a tenderness toward the self that we might not ordinarily feel. Foremost, going into retreat requires rejection of all outside energy.
In turning inward, in going into retreat, in rejecting the chaos of everyday life, we learn how to care for ourselves. We learn how to detach from the critics, whether outside of us or inside. We learn how to suspend judgment: what others might think of us, what we might think of us, how the world judges us every day.
In successful retreat, we achieve calmness and contentedness. Our minds slow down; our hearts slow down. We become better givers, lovers, kinder more gentler people, because we give to ourselves, love ourselves, are kind to ourselves. In desiring to be giving beings we must first learn how to give to ourselves. In desiring to become more compassionate beings we must first experience what that means, and the best way is to practice compassion toward ourselves. In desiring to be loved, we must first learn how to love ourselves.
If we are in the midst of painful recapitulation we have already learned how to leave the world behind, for we do it every time we go into a memory. We know how to retreat, but it’s vastly important that we give ourselves sacred space for healing retreat during recapitulation too. In small increments we must learn how to care for ourselves, even though we are not used to caring about ourselves at all.
Recapitulation is forging a new self...
Recapitulation is really a time of retraining our minds and bodies, of reawakening our spirits, and remaking ourselves into a different being altogether. It’s a time of rephrasing how we think and speak, recreating our life styles and agendas to fit the changing beings we are in the process of sculpting. And so, even when deep into painful recapitulation—especially when one is in deep painful recapitulation—one must take responsibility for occasionally pulling out of the chaos and advancing the healing process. By finding some means of rejecting the chaos—however captivating it may be—one establishes balance.
Keeping in mind that the intent of recapitulation is to heal, the balance comes in learning healing activities and skills, and actually practicing them. Nothing will change if one does not act on what one is learning during recapitulation. This entails regularly stepping back from the intensity of the process and assessing the progress made. This entails reevaluating the self, appreciating the self in a new way, actually rewarding the self for the difficult work that has been accomplished. This entails reframing the state of one’s mind by offering it positive accolades as one rejects the old negative thought language. This entails learning how to be gentle, kind, and compassionate with the self, and eventually learning how to love the self.
Although recapitulation is an ongoing process of change, there will always be times when it is appropriate to reject the chaos of recapitulation—even if only for a few minutes at a time. In such moments of respite—think calm retreat—one builds stamina and regains balance that may have been lost during intense memory recapitulations. One learns how to detach from energetic attachments, nurturing one’s own reclaimed energy in the process, experiencing small doses of freedom along with a newly unfolding self.
A young woman told us of losing her phone and how free she felt. Sitting in a circle of friends, she noticed how everyone had their head down, looking at their phones, texting, reading, only peripherally attached to the conversation of the group. In that moment she clearly understood the addiction that she normally carried in her own pocket, the addiction to constantly needing to be in touch, to not missing something, to having everything at her fingertips. In that moment she saw her friends as slaves and she experienced her own freedom. Forced to break her own habit, she experienced a sense of relief, for a moment glad she had lost her phone. For a moment she basked in her own place of calm retreat.
No matter who we are, where we are in our lives, no matter what is happening, we must learn to take moments of retreat. We must learn how to reject the chaos, turn from our addiction to the chaos of life, and take responsibility for our spirits needs for calmness and balance. We must learn to nurture ourselves. It’s not that hard to do.
Do not turn from that which arises as your biggest challenge this week, My Dears, for progress lies in such challenge.
As you meet your personal agenda—come to greet you in a myriad of ways—do not sit back and let it ride over you, but gather your wits about you and swim with the current, which will take you where you need to go.
In landing upon a new shore, whether literally or figuratively, you will find the next step upon your path. Within the self lies knowledge of how to proceed, yet confrontation, conflict, and challenge must arise to guide you when all else fails.
Question the self today as to how you’ve been handling things. Are you avoidant? Do you wait for others to make your decisions for you, or are you proactive? Do you take on your fears, wrestle them to the ground, or do they hold you down in a vise grip that does not allow for real life? Have you not already experienced a glimpse of life and don’t you desire more of it above all else?
I must confront all of you with the simple fact that life is short. In the grander scheme of eternity, life upon that earth is a mere blip and with each life you live comes an opportunity to more fully become alive and accepting of your challenges. Now is a day to challenge yourself; whether innerly or outerly does not matter, though I guarantee you will be offered an ultimatum of sorts.
Are you awake enough to recognize your personal challenge of now, of this moment in your life? Perhaps “this moment” in your life has dragged on for a long time, or perhaps it is but a blink of the eye, but know that a time of shift has been prepared for you. Alignments are in place, and all you need to do is click into alignment with what is being offered.
A final note: this is positive energy in alignment. So if you are feeling especially negative and lost, I suggest you wipe away your fears and your old ideas of self and the world and look on the bright side, for that is what is being presented now. The bright side of the moon, the sun, and the coin of opportunity are shining upon you all. Do you see it?
Look up from your reverie and catch a ray and then walk the path it lights up for you. That is the direction to go in now. Notice how everything is perfectly lined up for you. Do not hesitate or doubt what you are being shown, for this is the path of life, in this moment clearly revealed. The only real challenge is for each one of you to shift the self out of your slump, out of your pit of despair, and out of your despondency so that you “see” it. And then, as I said, dare the self to click into alignment and ride the energy without fear. And even though fear will attempt to accompany you, it will find no handhold, especially if you directly challenge its presence.
Go without fear into the life that awaits, for as I said, it seeks you. Though it may at first appear to be the most challenging of circumstances, in the end it will lead you into new life. What are you really afraid of? I gather it is nothing tangible, and if it were, it would not matter in the least, for if you align with the energy of now, nothing can stop you from achieving your dreams, even dreams you have no inkling of. It’s your choice, but I suggest that you face the dream and greet reality, a new reality.
Thanks to Jeanne for today’s message! Channeled, with love to you all, by Jan.
In Monday’s channeled message, Jeanne spoke of achieving balance through limitation. In her Wednesday blog, Jan wrote of the alchemical process of transformation through fermentation. The agent of that alchemical change is the limitation of a sealed container that sets the stage for nature to transform. Today, I focus on shaping and curing that sealed container. Like a ceramic vessel heated in a kiln, the container for our inner process of individuation must prove worthy of withstanding the many trials of heat that arise and serve our quest for wholeness.
Since waking this morning, the creative daemon has been stirring: fire energy, trial by fire. Already I’ve seen three people. The universe aligns with the creative daemon as I see its challenge reflected everywhere. I carefully channel it. Now, in an open space of time, it’s time to write my blog, but the creative fires are way too expansive. Everywhere I turn the world is ablaze. If I try to write now, I’ll be taken too far afield. The fire is too unwieldy, ungraspable except in its most gaseous intuitive sense.
The real trial is one of containment, and so I know I must find my way back down to earth, into the containment of the cool soil. I turn to the matter of my physicality, my body container as a form to regulate the fiery energy and expansive pressure of the creative daemon.
I’ve been gifted the images of the praying mantis and Buddha beneath the bodhi tree this morning. Images of stillness. Heeding these messages from the universe, I roll out my yoga mat and facing East, the direction of the rising fireball of the sun, I invoke the stillness of the Buddha and perform the Buddhist magical pass of prostration. Then I sit and engage in yoga pranayama breathing. The mind stills as the fiery energy begins to settle more into the rhythmic waves of the ocean. My awareness flows deeper into connection and regulation of the energy contained within my body. Deepening awareness of blockage and tension flow into softening and release. I move into yoga’s magical passes of asanas, working calmly with the creative fires still vying for my energy, my attention, my awareness.
“Not now,” I tell it. “Now is for forging the calm, preparing the container to channel your creation, your message, in a blog, soon to be undertaken.”
I finish yoga and choose to forego food or a magical walk. The body is calm and I know not to disturb it now. I’m ready to take on and be present with the daemon, to work together in the process of creation.
As I open the door, inviting the daemon in, the energy that greets me is intense. I remind myself to breathe, to unclench my jaw, to pause and release. My body has been forged as the container for this alchemical process of transforming the creative energies within me into a—hopefully—cohesive blog.
Eventually we emerge...changed
The body is our container in this world. The body is the vessel that connects us to the wellspring of our instinctive energies, as well as the infinitude of our energetic essence. When we walk, run, do yoga, golf, go to the gym, do magical passes, swim, exercise or meditate, we are forging our alchemical vessel to better serve our deeply sought after transformation into wholeness. Each time we are overwhelmed by the fires of recapitulation we are challenged to turn to the body container and engage in forging activity, just as I did this morning as I wrestled with the overpowering energy of my creative daemon. Eventually, we discover that out of the container a new calm, cured, self emerges.
Okay, now I can set this down, a message released through the alchemical process of containment. And now I may nourish my physical body in another way, with some fermented food, and then go off to a walking meditation, calmed and slowed by the midday sun for further curing of my vessel.
